My new position has me sitting next to hospital support people (3). We have some mean tech support people *laughs*. Mind you these are one sided but hella funny.

1) "Hello?"
"It's not deleting? What did you do?"
"Did you right click on the item and select delete?"
"What do you mean you can't right click?"
"Yes the delete key works too"
"What do you mean it doesn't have a delete key?"
"Sir we don't support Ipods".
*click*

2) "Prog support"
"No the system is online"
"Did anything pop up in the bottom right hand corner saying computer disconnected?"
"Did anything pop up in the bottom right hand corner saying computer disconnected?" (said louder)
"Did anything pop up in the bottom right hand corner saying computer disconnected?" (said very loud)
"Then answer my question"
"No sir I don't think you're stupid but you aren't telling me what I need to know"
"Yes sir you have to have that cable plugged in the ethernet port to have internet connection"
"I'm sorry it's in your way"

3) "Prog support"
"no"
"no"
"no"
"yes but.." (interupted)
"sir.." (interupted)
"you're no..." (interupted)
"Go ahead!"
"I'm a what?"
"Yes sir I'm retarded" (she says sarcastically)
"Mentally handicapped. That's what retarded means"
"Sir I'm not going to argue about what retarded means"
"You're not getting access"
"I'll be glad to tell my mother that"
"That sounds painful"
"Promises promises"

at this point I can hear the screams of some male voice coming on the line.

"Call him! I'd love to hear his reaction to this recorded phone call"
"Yes sir we record all calls"
"I bet your sorry"
"Have a good day too".

8/8/2006 10:20:49 AM

haha, Raige i want your job! you have some of the funniest tech stories ever

8/8/2006 10:40:33 AM

http://www.overheardintheoffice.com/

8/8/2006 10:48:24 AM

^^ I've gotten lucky enough to work with great people with great senses of humor.

8/8/2006 10:52:33 AM

Raige's job does indeed seem amusing

8/8/2006 11:02:27 AM

Haha good site

1) VP, using Instant Messenger: How do I type a smiley face that means, "I'll cut you."


2) Electrician: I think I may have made a mistake.
Owner of office: Ya think so? What gave it away, the flames?

3) Interviewer #1: You have had many jobs at that same company. Can you describe your work environment?
Forty-six-year-old proper woman: My company liked to move us around a lot so we got experience in different departments.
Interviewer #1: Was this a standard practice?
Woman: Oh, yes. They did that for everyone working at the restaurant's HQ. Every six months we would move from department to department. We liked to call it "tossing the salad."
Interviewer #1: Excuse me?
Interviewer #2: [Spits out his water.]
Interviewers #3,4, and 5: [Look away and laugh uncontrollably]
Woman: I got my salad tossed every six months, but in the past year moved it up to every three months. It's all part of the manager training program.
Interviewer #6: Did you like getting your salad tossed?
Woman: Yes, I did.
Interviewer #6: It must take some getting used to. We have never tossed salads here, but that is not to say we won't someday.
Woman: I would highly recommend it.

8/8/2006 11:08:45 AM

that site IS great




Co-Worker #1: Kids are just a built in excuse to call in sick. If Carl* can call in because his kid is sick, I should be able to call in sick because I'm hungover.
Co-Worker #2: Wouldn't that be every day then?
Co-Worker #1: No, I mean too hungover to work.

8/8/2006 11:45:08 AM

Quote :

"Department Head: So, can we update your job description tomorrow morning? Employee: No, I have a color correction session to attend. Department Head: Well, I notice you don't take lunch. You're usually at your desk. What about then? Employee: I do take lunch. I just eat at my desk and read a book or something. Department Head: Well, how about doing something more productive with that time? Do you want to meet then? Employee: No."

8/8/2006 12:03:23 PM

Tall tourist: Hey, they just said Union Square; is that our stop?
Big-Haired tourist: Our stop is 5th Street.
Conductor: The next stop will be 8th Street.
Doe-Eyed tourist: Is that our stop?
Big-Haired tourist: Our stop is 5th Street.
New Yorker #1: There isn't a stop for 5th Street.
Big-Haired tourist: Then how do we get to Central Park?
New Yorker #2: You should get off and go the other way-- 5th Avenue.
New Yorker #3, as doors open at 8th Street: But wait until Canal. Otherwise you'll have to pay the 2 bucks to get back on the train.

Big-Haired tourist wanders off the train without his tourist counterparts.

Doe-Eyed tourist, as the doors are closing: Wait. Why did he get off?
Tall tourist, to doors: Open up.
New Yorker #2, as the train pulls away: Do you have cell phones?
Tall tourist: No, ma'am.
New Yorker #4: Well, at least his hair looked good.

--Downtown R train

Overheard by: good lord, the tourists are in season







haha I can so see that happening in front of me

[Edited on August 8, 2006 at 1:04 PM. Reason : bad tourists]

8/8/2006 12:55:43 PM

not exactly overheard...but here's a section of the logs from our internal irc server just now.

Quote :

"[coworker 1] what's the command to mount var? [coworker 2] mount /var [coworker 1] hehe [coworker 1] dammit, I feel dumb [coworker 2] got any other complex questions for me? [coworker 1] where do babies come from? [me] mount /wife"

8/8/2006 1:27:08 PM

That website is 20 pages, each page taking ~4-5 minutes to read. Wouldn't recommend reading if at work right now.

8/8/2006 1:30:29 PM