* You have a wheelchair up on blocks in your front yard.
* You rigged up a beer cooler powered off your chair batteries.
* You wear cowboy, biker, or work boots, even though they're hard to put on and you can't walk anyway.
* Your joystick [which does not live up to its name] is a billiard ball, car stick shift knob, beer. tap, or similar item.
* You ever thought about jacking your chair up 2 or 3 feet.
* You have swampers on your wheelchair and no fullsize spare
* You replaced your seat with a Barco Lounger.
* You found the above BarcoLounger at the side of the road.
* You have ever thought about smuggling moonshine in the tubing or battery compartment of the chair.
* You, while in your wheelchair, ever made any roadkill.
* You browse truck catalogs looking for ways to soup up your wheelchair.
* Duct tape and zip ties play a major role in your repair and maintenance plan.
* You named your wheelchair the the YARRRRchairger
* Even your wheelchair can't pass inspection.
* You entered your wheelchair in the demolition derby, but had fuel delivery issues.
* Your wheelchair is a dually with a full Banks turbo kit.
* Your wheelchair has a built-in jager machine.
* Your wheelchair is equipped with a class III hitch and toolbox.







[Edited on November 4, 2006 at 10:47 PM. Reason : .]

11/4/2006 10:44:42 PM

cant pass inspection thats funny

http://raleigh.craigslist.org/for/224560298.html

11/4/2006 10:47:35 PM

^^AHAHA, gg, 22/10.
^damn, i would totally get that if i had the cash to blow.

[Edited on November 4, 2006 at 10:58 PM. Reason : .]

11/4/2006 10:57:04 PM

YARRRRR!!


A pirate walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened, you look terrible!"

"What do you mean?" the pirate replies, "I'm fine."

The bartender says, "But what about that wooden leg? You didn't have that before."

"Well," says the pirate, "We were in a battle at sea and a cannon ball hit my leg but the surgeon fixed me up, and I'm fine, really."

"Yeah," says the bartender, "But what about that hook? Last time I saw you, you had both hands."

"Well," says the pirate, "We were in another battle and we boarded the enemy ship. I was in a sword fight and my hand was cut off but the surgeon fixed me up with this hook, and I feel great, really."

"Oh," says the bartender, "What about that eye patch? Last time you were in here you had both eyes."

"Well," says the pirate, "One day when we were at sea, some birds were flying over the ship. I looked up, and one of them shat in my eye."

"So?" replied the bartender, "what happened? You couldn't have lost an eye just from some bird shit!"

"Well," says the pirate, "I really wasn't used to the hook yet."

11/4/2006 10:58:38 PM

i'm actually like 0.00001% disappointed that i'll most likely keep the left leg. i'd have the raddest prosthesis ever. like a 10ft. vertical and run 60mph+.

oh, and kick people's nuts into their throats.

11/4/2006 11:06:57 PM

http://www.apparelyzed.com/wheelchair-racing.html


Yarrr!

11/4/2006 11:16:47 PM

this is what you need Ivan

http://www.tankchair.com/

11/4/2006 11:31:13 PM

WTF

11/4/2006 11:52:44 PM

that is some shit

11/5/2006 12:48:36 AM

ok, what happened to Ivan? i must've missed something.

11/5/2006 1:01:22 AM

Two vultures sitting in a tree. One vulture sees a man in a wheelchair going down a hill. He taps the other vulture and says " Say, look Fred........ Meals on Wheels"

11/5/2006 2:04:25 AM

http://www.tshirthell.com/store/product.php?productid=517

11/5/2006 2:14:47 AM

hey Ivan can we sneak some PBR into you? When you get out we are renting the goat for a night all you can drink PBR

11/5/2006 3:08:24 AM

Put the mystery beer trash can on the wheelchair and let people chase him around the parking lot for free beers.

11/5/2006 3:31:18 AM

Quote :

"ok, what happened to Ivan? i must've missed something. "

11/5/2006 3:54:49 AM

he fell off a bike or something. i think i told him to do that in a thread once. oops.

11/5/2006 3:57:53 AM

It was a good bit more that just a fall, so I don't think it was your fault.

11/5/2006 4:22:46 AM

another pretty bad bike wreck. worse this time though. i'll post details/pics when i get out, hospital's network won't let me upload anything. i'm a magnet for cagers

11/5/2006 7:50:58 AM

Quote :

" * You browse truck catalogs looking for ways to soup up your wheelchair. "

hahha

11/5/2006 10:38:40 AM

well on the upbeat note, continuing the actual gimping:

*you ask the doctors whether your cast/braces/walker have been trail-rated before you put them to use
*you have your hospital TV on discovery channel's monster garage every time it comes on
*you got your IV lines converted to 3/4 inch PVC plumbing
*you are asking the hospital maintanance stuff whether they have surplus industrial grade air compressors and surgical-grade dewault drills for sale.
*when going into surgery, you ask for a laptop with an internet connection instead of anestesia.

11/5/2006 11:29:41 AM

damn dude, get well soon

11/5/2006 12:53:13 PM

damn man, i believe you have me beat, but on a good note, we have an '83 deville to get ready for next year's derby

11/5/2006 12:56:56 PM

somebody not see you? at least they stopped this time.

11/5/2006 1:28:36 PM

damn ivan. hope you get better.

11/5/2006 1:53:06 PM

damn dumbasses

i hate a cager

i'm gotten out unscathed by a couple of feet a couple of times...i guess you just got unlucky.

11/5/2006 1:54:05 PM

damn son.
glad you are alive

11/5/2006 2:13:20 PM

when was the accident and you were on Igor's bike?

11/5/2006 2:29:00 PM

wreck was oct. 31st and yeah, i was rollin the hawk. i hate i tore it up, but i think it should work out good for him on insurance with some $$ in his pocket and the bike fixed.

pretty sure the dude didn't stop for his stop sign. that's what he was charged with anyway. there's a real slight curve there, i didn't see him till the last second (too late).

despite the jokes in this thread, i am VERY fortunate to be keeping my left leg. initial indication was that i would lose it below the knee. it will still be a very long road to recovery, and what amount of use i'll regain is unknown. my right leg and left hand are broken as well, but should heal 100% no problem.

i've payed some heavy dues over the past 1.5 years to ride, with my wreck last year and now this. i think this is it for me. at least until i move somewhere MUCH less populated, or can afford the luxery of transporting a bike to such places regularly.

11/5/2006 4:01:22 PM

it was defenitely the scariest haloween i've ever had.

11/5/2006 4:14:51 PM

haha

11/5/2006 4:23:24 PM

jesus fucking christ. either ivan is full of shock in that one pict or he is one hard dude just blankly staring at the camera..

ill vote on the second.


'tis great you would think of the tdub community when you are in the hospital... brings tears to my eye.

that accident is scary as hell. it's making even me reconsider owning my lil sv seroiusly! if that fucker pulled off and i was on the bike.. in that situation i would would be in debt millions or at least hundreds of thousands.. i have no insurance to cover that to me if it happens to me on the bike and the fuckker pulls off.

also... damn igor .. now ur bikes going to have a salvage title.. i wonder how much they will sell it back to you for

11/5/2006 5:40:25 PM

damn son, get well

http://www.123greetings.com/general/getwell/gen_getwell_ani6.html

11/5/2006 5:48:35 PM

Quote :

"i have no insurance to cover that to me if it happens to me on the bike and the fuckker pulls off."

you're riding a motorcycle without having health insurance?

11/5/2006 5:50:37 PM

no i have health insurance.. just doesnt cover me on a bike.. i said this about a year ago b4 i got one. yeah i know it's dumb to ride like this and im just asking for it.

11/5/2006 5:54:47 PM

you do know you have to have health insurance to be a student... or else the university can drop you.

11/5/2006 6:00:29 PM

what you do it you tell em you fell off some stairs when you get to the hospital

11/5/2006 6:01:34 PM

haha

i have health insurance. it doesnt cover motorcycle accidents or accidents at sporting events. or something like if i went to watch some nascar and a bleacher falls or something and i dont get money from the place then i think im screwed then too. but i dont watch much nascar anymore

[Edited on November 5, 2006 at 6:06 PM. Reason : .]

11/5/2006 6:06:04 PM

ivan u still have ur motorcycle license when this accident happened?

11/5/2006 6:10:50 PM

Glad to hear you are keeping your leg. By the looks of the pictures it was almost gone Get well soon!

11/5/2006 6:29:16 PM

holy shit man.

get well soon.

11/5/2006 6:49:58 PM

Glad to hear you are going to keep your leg Ivan. Gimme a shout if you need anything.

11/5/2006 8:43:13 PM

Holy shit that's a horrible accident, but at least you're gonna keep the leg. Hope you get well soon man.

11/5/2006 10:51:05 PM

That looks horrible man. I hope you recover well.



[Edited on November 6, 2006 at 9:31 PM. Reason : -]

11/6/2006 12:17:44 AM

>.<

11/6/2006 12:24:26 AM

so how long did Ivan stay in the hospital?

11/6/2006 12:28:13 AM

jesus christ dude. take care of yourself and hope you get better.

i always said....i like my 4 wheels. fuck bikes. ain't ever getting on one.

11/6/2006 1:11:21 AM

DID? I am sure he is still there for a week or so I think. If it be up to him he would be at the goat prolly right as we speak hahahahaha

11/6/2006 1:16:11 AM

Quote :

"so how long did Ivan stay in the hospital?"

He's going to be in the hopsital for a few more days still. Take him some cute little messican midget hookers.

Now that the docs think he can keep his leg, reconstructive surgery starts tomorrow or Tuesday.

11/6/2006 1:28:25 AM

Quote :

"Was that the driver of the car?"

nah, that's one of my friends. there was a couple people hanging out at my house helping pwnt work on his bike that left shortly after i did and came up on the scene. he used to be an ER nurse at rex, so i assume he had some purpose behind the towel. it at least helped keep any more debris, etc. get in there i guess. good to have some people you know giving you some comfort while you wait for the meat wagon too.

leaving my room in a few minutes to go in for a few hours of surgery. mostly in the left leg, some on the right.

11/6/2006 10:00:16 AM

good luck, ill try to get out there tonight to see you.

11/6/2006 10:06:47 AM