I had an internship this past spring that was perhaps the best experience of my life. When I came home I cried a little because I missed my new friends. I was particularly close to one of the buyers there - he was always checking on me, offering to help with the kids (he had 6) when I was sick, staying late when I did if no one else was there so I wouldn't be alone in the building, always had some piece of insight or a boost in the right direction when I was stumped on some aspect of my project, and was the single most encouraging person I've ever met. He even organized a farewell dinner for me, and he actually cried - in public - when he gave his "thanks and goodbye" speech to our little group. Picture a 50-year-old short, balding, but somehow not fat Italian crying in Applebees ... you have to admit, it's pretty funny, but that's the kind of guy he was.

I just got a call that he died tonight of a heart attack. I kept telling myself this last two months I'll call when I'm done with this or that ... I never did. I wish I had. We stayed in touch last semester, but I let things fall to the wayside since Christmas. Needless to say I'm *quite* upset. I can't do much from here for his family, but I plan to at least write a letter with condolences and my own thanks and goodbye ... not sure yet if I'll send it to the office or his wife, but I'm leaning towards wife because I know if I were in that position I'd appreciate knowing that he made a difference - really made a difference, not just worked himself into an early grave. I haven't decided if I'll go to the funeral. I don't know if I'll have the money or if it'll even be appropriate if I can work the cash issue out.

With all the suicide things around and then things like this - it's another unpleasant reminder that our days with the people we care about are numbered one way or another. Make the most of them.



[tww is a blog]

2/15/2007 11:08:09 PM

Death is a not-so-gentle reminder to cherish the ones around you.

Sorry for your loss.

2/15/2007 11:10:29 PM

here today, gone tommorrow.

That's all we are: a moment's folly.

2/15/2007 11:12:36 PM

Anna Nicole?

2/15/2007 11:18:22 PM

I am sorry to hear of your loss.

2/15/2007 11:20:00 PM

no ... his name was Gene Onesi - he was a Buyer at the executive level in strategic sourcing for DuPont.


Does anyone know if something like this would be an excused absence? I'm guessing not, since he's not a blood relative.

[Edited on February 15, 2007 at 11:31 PM. Reason : .]

2/15/2007 11:24:33 PM

depends on the prof id say

2/16/2007 12:13:23 AM

yep

[Edited on February 16, 2007 at 12:15 AM. Reason : dublpost]

2/16/2007 12:15:44 AM

sorry to hear about your friend.

its always appropriate to send condolences to the family.

its always appropriate to go to the funeral if you are able.

his wife and family will absolutely appreciate your effort.

a funeral is always a legitimate excused absence even if not a blood relative (within reason, obviously you're not going to a different one every month). just give your profs the courtesy of notifying them before you leave, rather than waiting til after you come back.






[Edited on February 16, 2007 at 12:45 AM. Reason : ]

2/16/2007 12:43:14 AM

I'd give my instructors notice as more of a courtesy than anything else. If you have somewhere you need to be, go there and skip the class. Just don't make it a frequent habit.

2/16/2007 6:09:11 AM

2/16/2007 11:49:47 PM

bummer

2/16/2007 11:54:17 PM

sorry to hear about your loss
please go to the funeral if you can
a very good friend of mine died and I didn't even know it until AFTER the funeral . . . i have felt awful ever since, please go to the funeral

2/17/2007 1:05:01 AM

bl g

2/17/2007 12:53:42 PM