when/where was yours, anything funny happen?

my dad was kinda like mr. mackey on south park when i was 15

Quote :

"i hear you've been hookin up with stephanie, wear a condom, cause kids are bad mmmkay"

he probably wanted to say because shes a disease ridden slut

8/12/2008 7:52:53 AM

I didn't even get a talk at all. I got two books, i can't remember the titles though.

ah ha, thanks to Amazon, here they are:


and I think this was the other one, it was much less childish anyway




[Edited on August 12, 2008 at 8:02 AM. Reason : ]

8/12/2008 7:55:19 AM

my dad found my condoms and said whew that was easy...

8/12/2008 8:02:49 AM

My step-dad bought me my first box of condoms, my mom walked in on me losing it and promptly turned around and said, "Finish up and then we need to take C****y home". My dad called me and asked me about it later.

I didn't have the "talk" other than, use protection, babies = bad.

8/12/2008 8:20:04 AM

yeah, i was in high school and my dad kinda figured i was messing around with my gf.

one day he's like, "umm, i don't know what y'all do or if she's on the pill or whatever, but don't get her pregnant. i can't afford another kid. i'll buy you some condoms if you need me to." I said, "don't worry, i got it covered." don't know if he took that to mean that i had it covered with a rubber or if i had things under control. i meant the latter, but whatever.

that's all i really got in ways of a "talk".

8/12/2008 8:42:18 AM

i didn't get the talk either. had sex ed in 8th grade, so i guess my parents figured that the pubic school system took care of it for them.

8/12/2008 8:44:37 AM

i never got why people had "the talk"...i thought everyone knew what fucking was by like age 12

[Edited on August 12, 2008 at 8:46 AM. Reason : ^^agreed...thats about the only talk i got was that my stepdad would buy me condoms]

[Edited on August 12, 2008 at 8:52 AM. Reason : \/ fine]

8/12/2008 8:45:53 AM

no talk

^ psh id say more like 12
^^ ha hahahahaha
and i think my mom felt the same way about school covering everything
[Edited on August 12, 2008 at 8:49 AM. Reason : ]

[Edited on August 12, 2008 at 8:52 AM. Reason : oh well]

[Edited on August 12, 2008 at 9:00 AM. Reason : oops]

8/12/2008 8:48:17 AM

Never really had a "talk"

My mom would randomly ask me if I was having sex and of course my answer was NO!!! lol

Now if I'm sick or something she's like "Is there any chance you're pregnant?!?!?"

8/12/2008 8:51:09 AM

^^he said he had "sex ed" in 8th grade...not sex

[Edited on August 12, 2008 at 8:54 AM. Reason : way to tell everyone when you lost your virginity]

8/12/2008 8:53:30 AM

Quote :

"so i guess my parents figured that the pubic school system took care of it for them. 8/12/2008 8:44:37 AM drunknloaded "

ahahahahahaha, true juxtaposition in a thread

8/12/2008 8:53:38 AM

Quote :

"one day he's like, "umm, i don't know what y'all do or if she's on the pill or whatever, but don't get her pregnant. i can't afford another kid. i'll buy you some condoms if you need me to." I said, "don't worry, i got it covered." don't know if he took that to mean that i had it covered with a rubber or if i had things under control. i meant the latter, but whatever."

yeah, this is similar to my dad. The closest thing to "the talk" we ever had was when i broke up with my first serious girlfriend after my freshman year of college. My dad goes "so, um, we don't have to worry about her calling you in a week saying she is pregnant do we?" And I replied "no dad, we took precautions." and that was that.

8/12/2008 8:54:10 AM

it's a shame that buttsek's parents never told him not to let dude's bust nuts over his face

they created a cock smoking monster!

8/12/2008 8:56:04 AM

^^^^ haha nevermind then

[Edited on August 12, 2008 at 8:58 AM. Reason : hks]

[Edited on August 12, 2008 at 8:59 AM. Reason : ah]

8/12/2008 8:57:09 AM

hah

i won't tell my story

but i'll just say that was an interesting night

8/12/2008 8:57:47 AM

did your parents know you were gay when you had the talk or were they still under the impression you were straight?

8/12/2008 8:58:21 AM

that was the night they found out i LOLed them all was gay

suffice to say i didn't want them to find out... and even if i did, this was not the manner in which i wanted them to find out... heh

[Edited on August 12, 2008 at 9:00 AM. Reason : .]

8/12/2008 8:59:45 AM

damn i bet that was awkward...i'm guessing you having loving/understanding parents

[Edited on August 12, 2008 at 9:05 AM. Reason : \/ ]

8/12/2008 9:02:10 AM

you'd be wrong

8/12/2008 9:03:58 AM

did they find a zucchini and bottle of vaseline in your room?

8/12/2008 9:05:26 AM

^

8/12/2008 9:05:53 AM

my talk was when I was 11 in front of my friends "birth control doesn't work, look at the three fucking little shits I got" then she went to tell what type of birth control each kid broke the odds on.

8/12/2008 9:05:54 AM

penile dingle berries ftl

8/12/2008 9:06:11 AM

Quote :

"did they find a zucchini and bottle of vaseline in your room?"

more like my boyfriend



..well shit, i guess i ended up sorta telling the story anyway...

8/12/2008 9:07:01 AM

^oh shit!
they musta freaked.
were yall nekkid and getting it on or something?

8/12/2008 9:08:20 AM

^ Is fapping

8/12/2008 9:09:19 AM

they seriously picked the worst time to have the talk

8/12/2008 9:09:19 AM

never really had it

my dad found my stash of condoms when i was in high school but really didnt know what to do

fortunately, he said that he wasnt going to tell my mom because then i would have never heard the end of that shit...probably, the nicest thing that he has ever done for me

[Edited on August 12, 2008 at 9:10 AM. Reason : 

8/12/2008 9:09:24 AM

"let me get one of those son, dont want your whore of a mother to get pregnant again"

8/12/2008 9:09:57 AM

when i was a freshman mom gave me a pack of condoms and told me whatever I did please be careful.

8/12/2008 9:11:26 AM

Quote :

"^oh shit! they musta freaked. were yall nekkid and getting it on or something?"

basically

8/12/2008 9:12:08 AM

^6 I have this fear that my parents would walk in on me. like this HUGE fear. Then I think how fucking terrible and fearful gay people must be of thier parents walking in of them.

[Edited on August 12, 2008 at 9:13 AM. Reason : agghhhh]

8/12/2008 9:12:11 AM

i never had sex in my parents house. that is the best way to assure they will not walk in on you.

BACK SEAT OF MY JEEP FTW

8/12/2008 9:13:47 AM

DJ then you just have the cops, not fun either.

8/12/2008 9:16:21 AM

i used to call my mom's durango the shaggin wagon, with the 2nd and 3rd row folding seats, till she found a condom wrapper in there one day, and it was back to contortoinist style in my mustang

8/12/2008 9:16:46 AM

I tried it in my old camaro one time. Definitely, FTL. My Jeep Cherokee, FTW, except for the whole me being too tall (even when the back seat is down), so I have to bend her over the front seat to bang it out the back!

8/12/2008 9:21:19 AM

i never had the talk...at least, not that i remember

maybe i blocked it out or something

8/12/2008 9:21:56 AM

Yep...my mom totally rented this movie and made me watch it.

8/12/2008 9:24:07 AM

^ someone embed

8/12/2008 9:59:50 AM

I never had the talk. But I'm not worried about getting her pregnant because we have sex standing up

8/12/2008 10:01:47 AM

Quote :

"I never had the talk"

damn minorities, all my tax dollars are takin care of yalls kids because you can't wrap that shit up or keep it in your pants

8/12/2008 10:03:58 AM

^^ no, no...girl on top is the only way to go, because gravity will keep your splooge getting all the way up in there

^ i don't have any kids (yet, or that i know of)

[Edited on August 12, 2008 at 10:04 AM. Reason : .]

8/12/2008 10:04:28 AM

having sex in water helps too

8/12/2008 10:05:42 AM

i keep a bottle of the morning after pills by my bed, and if the girl doesn't wanna take it, I crush it up and put it in her orange juice

8/12/2008 10:09:24 AM

^ like you do the night before with rufees?

8/12/2008 10:41:28 AM

^ LOOK, DON'T JUDGE, OKAY?

8/12/2008 10:47:50 AM

date rape ftmfw

8/12/2008 11:02:37 AM

My mom and dad sat my sisters and I down when I was in the 8th grade and they were in the 9th and told us to wait until marriage for sex. Now my sisters and I are so fucked up in the head. My family used to be sooo fucking religious back then. My sisters are 24 still virgins and I'm 22 and on the brink of rebelling (a little late, I know)... My 19 year old brother is the only one who escaped... He missed our family's fanatical religious phase. He bustin' it up every chance he gets, with no feelings of guilt

8/12/2008 11:04:42 AM

i remember when the retard on LA Law found him some steamy dervish trim. everyone started freaking out. gave him a bunch of bannanas and rubbers and stuff. they were all like "we don't your fucked up ass cranking out any spawn ok"

8/12/2008 11:06:15 AM

i hate religious nuts

8/12/2008 11:07:01 AM