IMStoned420 All American 15485 Posts user info edit post |
you're kinda like a zombie 10/4/2008 5:03:57 PM |
Airbag Suspended 12921 Posts user info edit post |
k 10/4/2008 5:04:03 PM |
chembob Yankee Cowboy 27011 Posts user info edit post |
this hasn't been done before
Quote : | "Hi. You're probably new to the Wolf Web. In fact, I'm willing to bet you're new to college in general. It's an exciting time, isn't it? I'm sure that you have been exposed to many ideas and perspectives you'd never realized existed, and you're just bursting with enthusiasm at the thought of sharing a few ideas of your own with your peers now that you find yourself in an academic environment that seems perfectly suited to such an exchange.
Why don't we go a little further? Odds are you consider yourself very intelligent. In fact, you're probably so intelligent that you've figured out all the quirks and kinks of organized religion--or at l east Christianity. Yeah, that's it, isn't it? You were probably raised in a Christian household and resent that upbringing for limiting your personal freedoms, so it's only natural that you'd seek to undermine Christ's teachings and save others from having such a faulty belief system for their own good. Pretty cool of you, isn't it? You've really got it together.
FUCK YOU YOU STUPID FUCKING FAGGOT COLLEGE KID
LET ME TELL YOU A SECRET
NONE OF YOUR THOUGHTS ON RELIGION ARE RADICAL OR EVEN THOUGHT-PROVOKING
IT'S NO SECRET YOU GOT THEM OFF A FUCKING WEBSITE
WE'VE ALL READ THE PROSELYTIZER QUESTIONNAIRE TOO
NOTHING YOU CAN SAY IS GOING TO LEND A FRESH OUTLOOK
DO YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND
THAT FOR SEVERAL FUCKING CENTURIES NOW
SOME OF THE MOST EDUCATED PEOPLE IN THE ANNALS OF HUMAN HISTORY
HAVE DEVOTED THEIR LIVES TO ANSWERING DEEPER THEOLOGICAL CONCERNS
THAN YOUR PETTY BULLSHIT
ABOUT THE DISCREPANCIES IN THE GENEALOGIES OF CHRIST IN THE GOSPELS?
I MEAN
HOLY FUCK
DO YOU THINK YOU'RE THE ONLY COCKSUCKER WHO EVER NOTICED THAT OR SOMETHING?!
WAKE THE FUCK UP
YOU'RE STILL JUST A STUPID KID
AND WHAT YOU'RE TRYING TO DO IS SHAMEFUL
INCONSIDERATE
AND DISRESPECTFUL
BECAUSE MAYBE YOU'RE TOO MUCH OF A PUSSY
TO LIVE ACCORDING TO A STRICT MORAL CODE
AND MAYBE YOU'RE TOO MUCH OF A PUSSY
TO ACTUALLY TRY AND DEVELOP A STRONG, HONORABLE CHARACTER
BUT THAT DOESN'T MAKE IT RIGHT
FOR YOU TO ATTACK MILLIONS UPON MILLIONS OF PEOPLE
NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU TRY TO PLAY THE VICTIM
TALKING ABOUT HOW THEY "FORCE THEIR BELIEFS" ON YOU
BY HANDING OUT A FUCKING PAMPHLET
I MEAN HOLY FUCKING CHRIST
WHAT YOU'RE TRYING TO DO IS TEN TIMES WORSE
GET OVER YOURSELF ALREADY
THIS REBELLION AGAINST MOMMY AND DADDY ISN'T IMPRESSING ANYONE
WE'VE SEEN IT BEFORE
YOU ARE NOT THE FIRST
YOU ARE NOT EVEN REMARKABLE
STOP ARGUING WITH GARY
HE IS MAKING A FOOL OF YOU
I SWEAR UPON THE BODY AND BLOOD OF THE PIERCED FUCKING JEW KING
THAT IF YOU PULL THIS SALISBURYBOY, SYLVERSHADOW KIND OF SHIT ON ME
YOU WORTHLESS WICCAN PANTYSTAIN
I WILL SPLIT THE TENDER TISSUES OF YOUR WEEPING ASSHOLE
WITH A HARDCOVER EDITION OF THE NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION
OF THE HOLY FUCKING BIBLE
YOU THINK YOU'RE SO FUCKING SMART
I'D LIKE TO SEE YOU DO THE SAME SHIT WITH ANY RELIGION
BESIDES CHRISTIANITY OR JUDAISM
WITH SOME BOOK BESIDES THE BIBLE OR THE TORAH
YOU AIDS-FELCHING CUM FLAKE
SO PUT THAT IN YOUR FUCKING PIPE YOU JUST BOUGHT FROM BUDDHA'S BELLY
THE FIRST WEEKEND YOU WERE UP HERE
AND SMOKE IT
YOU FUCKING FAGGOT COLLEGE KID
and that's my word." |
-FroshKiller10/4/2008 5:09:05 PM |
AndyMac All American 31922 Posts user info edit post |
Because we die and are reborn in the spirit? 10/4/2008 5:13:08 PM |
IMStoned420 All American 15485 Posts user info edit post |
Also because you eat human flesh 10/4/2008 5:25:33 PM |
AndyMac All American 31922 Posts user info edit post |
Metaphorically speaking, yeah I guess so.
Also, we are all incestuous because we consider everyone "brothers" and "sisters," even our spouses. 10/4/2008 5:27:50 PM |
vinylbandit All American 48079 Posts user info edit post |
^^^^ I was trying to recite that to Jen last night and failing miserably, but I couldn't think of a place where it was posted. 10/4/2008 5:43:37 PM |
SaabTurbo All American 25459 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "that would work
IF THERE WAS A GOD" |
10/4/2008 5:45:07 PM |
JBaz All American 16764 Posts user info edit post |
I eat bread, does that make me a bad person? 10/4/2008 6:18:22 PM |
zxappeal All American 26824 Posts user info edit post |
Any religious zealot comes off as being an opinionated, rabid prick.
Of course, pot zealots come across the same way.
Flaming liberals.
Rabid republicans.
gay people.
black people.
rednex
white people
Muslims
Christians
Never really heard Jews be that way
Mechanics
Lawyers
Doctors
shitdiggers
jizzmoppers
and so on and so on
and scooby dooby dooby 10/4/2008 6:23:31 PM |
quagmire02 All American 44225 Posts user info edit post |
^ 10/4/2008 6:33:13 PM |
redwop All American 1027 Posts user info edit post |
Mindless zombies who live their whole life driven by fear. Sorta like the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown. He was so obsessed and afraid to question the existence of the Great Pumpkin he did not go trick or treat and missed out on all the fun. 10/4/2008 7:48:59 PM |
puppy All American 8888 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | " Mindless zombies who live their whole life driven by fear. " |
sadly, that's true.
but yeah, this "zombie" theory is nothing new. I was sitting in church the other week thinking the same thing. (yes, my mind wanders and I don't really pay any attention to anything being said. I only go for the illusion of a "good girl")10/4/2008 8:21:56 PM |
SaabTurbo All American 25459 Posts user info edit post |
^ STOP THAT SHIT SON. YOU'RE ONLY PERPETUATING THE CYCLE. 10/4/2008 8:23:11 PM |
sawahash All American 35321 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "Also because you eat human flesh" |
that depends on which denomination you are.10/4/2008 8:23:17 PM |
SaabTurbo All American 25459 Posts user info edit post |
YOU VEGGIE FAKERS THINK IT'S NOT REAL. ONLY THE REAL NON-FAKERS EAT THE MAN FLESH. 10/4/2008 8:24:34 PM |
puppy All American 8888 Posts user info edit post |
^^^ I'm not a son, but yeah, you are probably right. 10/4/2008 8:38:13 PM |
sawahash All American 35321 Posts user info edit post |
I think the best way to be a Christian is to constantly ask questions and search for the true answer. 10/4/2008 8:39:12 PM |
SaabTurbo All American 25459 Posts user info edit post |
^^ LOOK, I DON'T CARE WHETHER OR NOT YOU'RE A SON, SON.
^ THE BEST WAY TO BE A CHRISTIAN IS TO QUIT. 10/4/2008 8:40:19 PM |
tromboner950 All American 9667 Posts user info edit post |
^^[/thread]
[Edited on October 4, 2008 at 8:40 PM. Reason : .] 10/4/2008 8:40:24 PM |
puppy All American 8888 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "I think the best way to be a Christian is to constantly ask questions and search for the true answer. " |
that may be the real reason I'm still hanging in there. But I've been going "LOL WUT?" to most of what christians say.10/4/2008 8:42:22 PM |
SaabTurbo All American 25459 Posts user info edit post |
YOU'VE REALIZED IT'S A HUGE PILE OF BULLSHIT AND I'M VERY GLAD.
NOTHING THEY SAY MAKES SENSE BECAUSE IT'S 100% SPECULATION.
"GOD HAS A PLAN" = "I HAVE NO EXPLANATION FOR WHAT HAPPENED AND I HAVE NO IDEA OF WHAT WILL HAPPEN"
"GOD WORKS IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS" = "I HAVE NO EXPLANATION FOR WHAT HAPPENED"
"EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON" = "I HAVE NO EXPLANATION FOR WHAT HAPPENED"
"YOU JUST HAVE TO HAVE FAITH" = "I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT WILL HAPPEN"
[Edited on October 4, 2008 at 8:46 PM. Reason : ] 10/4/2008 8:44:16 PM |
sawahash All American 35321 Posts user info edit post |
^^I do that a lot. But you know too many Christians actually believe the Bible literally...I mean when I meet someone who does that I just do :carl face: 10/4/2008 8:46:16 PM |
SaabTurbo All American 25459 Posts user info edit post |
SO NOW YOU ADMIT THAT YOU CANNOT TAKE IT LITERALLY, WHICH MEANS YOU HAVE TO INTERPRET IT, A PROCESS THAT IS COMPLETELY SUBJECTIVE, WHICH IN TURN MEANS IT'S COMPLETELY FUCKING WORTHLESS.
[Edited on October 4, 2008 at 8:48 PM. Reason : ] 10/4/2008 8:47:37 PM |
tromboner950 All American 9667 Posts user info edit post |
Saab, refer yourself to the chunk of copy-pasted text from FroshKiller.
You're sounding just about as fucking stupid as him right now. Seriously, kill the caps.
Also, kill the 100% absolute certainty... typically people who express complete and total certainty in an idea aren't really that smart.
[Edited on October 4, 2008 at 8:52 PM. Reason : .] 10/4/2008 8:49:45 PM |
SaabTurbo All American 25459 Posts user info edit post |
I'VE MET THAT RETARDED FAGGOT AND THAT COMMENT IS NOTHING SPECIAL. 10/4/2008 8:50:59 PM |
Str8Foolish All American 4852 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "SO NOW YOU ADMIT THAT YOU CANNOT TAKE IT LITERALLY, WHICH MEANS YOU HAVE TO INTERPRET IT, A PROCESS THAT IS COMPLETELY SUBJECTIVE, WHICH IN TURN MEANS IT'S COMPLETELY FUCKING WORTHLESS." |
haha nope10/4/2008 8:51:56 PM |
SaabTurbo All American 25459 Posts user info edit post |
YEP SON.
YEP. 10/4/2008 8:53:32 PM |