Quote :

"I want a woman who is prepared to admit that what she wants from a man is a big c*** and a lot of money. I am fed up with women always claiming that what they find most sexy is a sense of humour. Because it isn’t true. I know this because I am hilarious. Way more funny than most of the slack-arsed, car-obsessed, office wonk baldies you’ll meet in a wine bar on a Friday night, and yet I practically never get laid. If it were true that women are turned on by a man who makes them laugh, Woody Allen wouldn’t have had to marry his own daughter."

Quote :

"I’ll be honest, in five years of marriage, I quickly learnt to be too afraid to imagine the perfect woman. If I had even so much as looked off into the middle distance and begun to picture a half-Swedish, half-Japanese, permanently 25-year-old, 5ft 8in bisexual gymnast with a medium cup, a penchant for tastefully slutty cocktail dresses and an erotically feisty side that meant arguments about the Iraq war always deteriorated into sex rather than slammed doors, my wife would have known."

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/men/article4790198.ece

LOL

10/14/2008 12:37:06 PM

aha

10/14/2008 12:38:45 PM

apparently him and i have the exact same desire for the perfect woman.

10/14/2008 12:39:07 PM

Quote :

"She speaks when she's spoken to, smells lovely and has a big nose"

fuck that, i'm SO done with JDate

10/14/2008 12:39:23 PM

Quote :

"She speaks when she's spoken to, smells lovely and has a big nose"

sounds like he wants a Golden Retriever

great, leave the human women to the rest of us

10/14/2008 12:57:45 PM

^i lol'd

10/14/2008 12:59:11 PM

Quote :

"my imagination couldn’t hold a candle to the real thing. The best part of falling in love with Claire was discovering all the things I didn’t know I wanted or needed."

It's true the other way

I really enjoyed this article.
And especially these parts:

Quote :

"Our daughter was born last week. Claire was pulling faces I’d never seen before and crushing my hand in hers. “Does anyone ever manage to do this without the swearwords?” I asked the midwife. Oh, yes, she said gently, through the torrent of obscenities. It struck me then that Claire, in her mind probably far from her best or most elegant, was incapable of not looking good, and even her swearing had a kind of grace to it. I’d never seen Claire, or anyone, look so beautiful. Then I saw my daughter, and that’s a whole other story. "

Quote :

"That is obviously a lie. A man trap. She will read this and I won’t be allowed to go to Tokyo or Stockholm or bisexual-gymnast meets ever again. So, obviously, my perfect woman is my wife. But there are ways to improve on perfection. First, the perfect woman would show far greater tolerance of her perfect man’s habits. She would allow, for example, just off the top of my head, not that I have a list or anything, the following: sugar in tea; a healthy scepticism of yoga and/or arnica; at least one curry a week; nonorganic deodorant (ie stuff that works); and free rein in Blockbuster at least twice a year (free rein to include films with explosions in them). Second, she’d intuitively understand and accept that she was the less accomplished driver. And map reader. And satnav operator. "

Quote :

"Either way, my ideal man changes every three minutes. I’ve got the romantic attention span of a trainee painter-decorator. "

10/14/2008 3:22:53 PM

Quote :

"sounds like he wants a Golden Retriever great, leave the human women to the rest of us"

\

ahahah

10/14/2008 3:35:15 PM

I feel sorry for the golden retriever.

10/14/2008 9:21:36 PM

Quote :

"If it were true that women are turned on by a man who makes them laugh, Woody Allen wouldn’t have had to marry his own daughter."

10/14/2008 9:42:22 PM