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 Message Boards » » So about 5 minutes ago Page [1]  
punchmonk
Double Entendre
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someone walked in our front door and I heard the screen door close. I get out of bed and walk into the living room. Some random person is standing in our living room and all I see is a silhouette of them. I scream "Oh My God!!!!!" and they start bumbling with their words.
Our next door neighbors walk in our house at 2:30 in the morning with cookout and were in the process of removing their shoes. The guy goes, "Wait, we don't have an upstairs."
Who does that? How do you walk into a house that is completely not set up like your's and the outside appearance is completely different?
I was a bit freaked out. At least I know how I will react next time there is a real robber in the house.

[Edited on March 6, 2009 at 2:41 AM. Reason : ...]

3/6/2009 2:40:58 AM

simonn
best gottfriend
28968 Posts
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get a handgun while it's still legal!

3/6/2009 2:42:07 AM

punchmonk
Double Entendre
22300 Posts
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18300!!

3/6/2009 2:42:43 AM

simonn
best gottfriend
28968 Posts
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i'm beginning to make the preparations for my 20k party.

3/6/2009 2:43:38 AM

Tiberius
Suspended
7607 Posts
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ahahaha

awesome

this reminds me of the guy that used to live up the street from me on Brent Rd who would always get trashed and come back to our place

one time he was beating on the door at like 2AM and 69 wielded a shotgun at him, guy fell down the porch stairs and landed on his back in his haste to leave, and never came back after that

3/6/2009 2:44:06 AM

wwwebsurfer
All American
10217 Posts
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these things called locks - do you not own any?!

3/6/2009 2:46:40 AM

simonn
best gottfriend
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^ lol, i didn't even think to ask why your door wasn't locked... but why wasn't your door locked?

3/6/2009 2:47:16 AM

NeuseRvrRat
hello Mr. NSA!
35386 Posts
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3/6/2009 2:47:20 AM

Aficionado
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when i lived in UH, there was a guy that tried to get into his room in our apartment, drunk off his ass

my roommate and i were all, he doesnt live here to his friend helping him home

as soon as drunk guy left, he threw up all over the breezeway

we were about 15 seconds from having a huge mess in the apartment

3/6/2009 8:42:12 AM

grimx
#maketwwgreatagain
32337 Posts
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3/6/2009 8:43:01 AM

LaserSoup
All American
5503 Posts
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Quote :
"these things called locks - do you not own any?!"


Or you could have used your powers of telekinesis to push them out the door, but not before grabbing the bag of Cookout.

3/6/2009 8:45:09 AM

needlesmcgir
All American
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Did they bring you cookout? I just would have been mad that they didn't bring me cookout.

3/6/2009 9:25:19 AM

Ragged
All American
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Quote :
"get a handgun musket while it's still legal"

dont need a permit for that

3/6/2009 9:30:38 AM

hershculez
All American
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I about 3 years ago I was a server at The Olive Garden in Cary. This couple came in, sat down, and ordered their drinks. When I came back to the table the lady asks me "Can we have the Lobsterfest menu?"

::sideways glance:: "what?"

"Where is the Lobsterfest menu we saw on tv?"

"Um, ma'am, you two are at the Olive Garden. Red Lobster is next door".

Haha they were so embarassed that they paid for their drinks and gave me $10 for wasting my time. It was pretty funny.

3/6/2009 9:34:45 AM

Aficionado
Suspended
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fuck a handgun for home defence

you need a shotgun

no permit required and you have modern technology

3/6/2009 9:34:48 AM

Sweden
All American
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3/6/2009 9:35:27 AM

AndyMac
All American
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I don't ever lock my door

But I also live in a town of about 1800

3/6/2009 9:35:58 AM

ScHpEnXeL
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qntmfred's ninja skills would have saved you

3/6/2009 9:36:39 AM

hershculez
All American
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I think they are only aplicable to wood monsters. It's hard to do flips and cartwheels and whatever else he does to the wood monsters in your living room.

3/6/2009 9:38:47 AM

ScHpEnXeL
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do you not realize who you're talking about?

3/6/2009 9:47:11 AM

punchmonk
Double Entendre
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Quote :
"these things called locks - do you not own any?!"


I forgot to lock the door after my friend left at 2am. She, my friend and I had an amazing conversation that was pretty emotionally draining so I went to bed thinking I had locked the door. Lame.

3/6/2009 10:05:23 AM

Jrb599
All American
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so you get out of bed, have your run in with the neighbors, then post on TWW.


I think you may have a TWW-addiction.

3/6/2009 10:07:00 AM

oneandonly
All American
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HAHAHAHAHAH I know somebody that did exactly that... except passed out on the neighbors couch... still thinking it was his house... and I really hope he reads this Best story of my life.

3/6/2009 10:11:02 AM

Skack
All American
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Quote :
"I don't ever lock my door

But I also live in a town of about 1800"


I'm pretty sure >1 in 1799 people are criminals.


Quote :
"Who does that? How do you walk into a house that is completely not set up like your's and the outside appearance is completely different?"


______ is a helluva drug!

3/6/2009 10:11:19 AM

punchmonk
Double Entendre
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My friend and I were laughing about it afterward bc I was so embarrassed that I wasn't more hardcore about getting people out of my house at 2:30 in the morning. I kept getting these visions of being shot in the chest by a shotgun. My body was shaking so much for about 15 minutes.

[Edited on March 6, 2009 at 10:14 AM. Reason : ...]

3/6/2009 10:13:24 AM

Slave Famous
Become Wrath
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qntmfred sounds like a hell of a husband

"hey baby go see about that mystery intruder, I'm trying to catch up on sleep here"

3/6/2009 10:15:29 AM

punchmonk
Double Entendre
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nah...he was there too.

3/6/2009 10:16:09 AM

qntmfred
retired
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hey i was busy ok. i had to go clean the piss out of my drawers

i was in the office at the front of the house at the time so i heard them come in. but punchmonk had a cooking party last night and we kept the front door open (except for the glass outer door). one of her friends didn't leave till around 2 so when i heard the door open i thought she came back to get something. when i heard them talking it didn't sound like anybody i knew so i came out and saw it was the neighbor's teenage daughter and i guess her bf. they were just standing there like idiots so there was no need to transform into ass kicking mode. i helped them along by reminding them this wasn't their house and they left. fun.


[Edited on March 6, 2009 at 10:21 AM. Reason : .]

3/6/2009 10:16:40 AM

dustm
All American
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Freshman year in Tyler Hall some guy came in our room in the middle of the night, walked up to my roommate('s bed) and proceeded to whip it out and piss everywhere. My roommate woke up in the midst of this and managed a "what the hell are you doing?" before the guy zipped it up and left. I have to say our room was right across the hall from the bathroom which could be confusing if you were a drunk douchebag. Completely understandable considering they mistook the laundry room for the bathroom on numerous occasions, which was mirrored down the hall from the bathroom. As for why our door was unlocked I am not sure.

3/6/2009 10:18:40 AM

iphotou
All American
13047 Posts
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Quote :
"I about 3 years ago I was a server at The Olive Garden in Cary. This couple came in, sat down, and ordered their drinks. When I came back to the table the lady asks me "Can we have the Lobsterfest menu?"

::sideways glance:: "what?"

"Where is the Lobsterfest menu we saw on tv?"

"Um, ma'am, you two are at the Olive Garden. Red Lobster is next door".

Haha they were so embarassed that they paid for their drinks and gave me $10 for wasting my time. It was pretty funny."

3/6/2009 10:19:25 AM

ScHpEnXeL
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I have a few stories of this.

Many times random people came crashing into my apt thinking it was the one on the floor under me that partied constantly

The best though was when my buddy was getting sick at a club and went to sleep in the car. He def slept in the wrong fucking car and was still in there when the people who owned the car got in it.. Luckily they were cool and didn't beat his ass or anything. Twas funny as shit.

3/6/2009 10:20:16 AM

Slave Famous
Become Wrath
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Once at ECU I got up to piss at like 4 am on a weeknight and there's some random dude crapping in our sink

he sees me and lols and holds his finger up to his lips like "Shhhhhhhh, don't tell anyone !"

I didn't wanna mess with him since he was completely naked except for a shirt which he had pulled over his head Cornholio style

so i pissed in the pisser, then peaced

I thought it might have been a dream till I woke up the next morning and went in there to brush my teeth

There were three turds in the sink and someone had written "Fuck you Kyle" with shit on the mirror

Kyle was my roommate

3/6/2009 10:23:16 AM

qntmfred
retired
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when I was at State, i lived in a house near The Goat and we were having a party and pretty much everybody had left when a 16ish year old came into the house. we figured he was friends with somebody at the party so we didn't think too much of it. but the kid was acting really weird like he was high or drunk or something. after a few minutes of talking to him, we realized he was not supposed to be there. turns out he was mentally challenged and had WANDERED AWAY FROM HIS PARENTS AT THE KMART 2 MILES AWAY. after a little while we managed to get a phone number from him and eventually reached his parents who came to pick him up.

3/6/2009 10:24:21 AM

ScHpEnXeL
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^^ahahahha

[Edited on March 6, 2009 at 10:24 AM. Reason : ^^'s]

3/6/2009 10:24:30 AM

Master_Yoda
All American
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^^^

damn dude. I hope you got the roomie to clean up.

3/6/2009 10:59:28 AM

hershculez
All American
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Quote :
"Freshman year in Tyler Hall "


Where is that? I thought I knew all the dorms.

3/6/2009 11:08:25 AM

dustm
All American
14297 Posts
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ECU

3/6/2009 11:09:08 AM

Slave Famous
Become Wrath
34079 Posts
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^^^Nah we left it for the Janitor

3/6/2009 11:10:24 AM

BubbleBobble
BACK IN DA HIGH LIFE
115312 Posts
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I was expecting this to end with

THEN WHO WAS PHONE?

3/6/2009 11:16:07 AM

elkaybie
All American
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my brother and i lived in the same place in college at different times...he first for 2 years, then i for 4. one night during the 2nd year i lived there, a friend of his came barging in WASTED asking where my brother was...i called the poor sap another cab and sent him to my brother's new place

3/6/2009 11:49:25 AM

Arab13
Art Vandelay
45181 Posts
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you didn't bother locking the door? shit you should do that at night at least....

Quote :
"these things called locks - do you not own any?!"


i guess the door will probably be checked if it's locked now huh?

[Edited on March 6, 2009 at 12:30 PM. Reason : lulz]

3/6/2009 12:26:53 PM

Fareako
Shitter Pilot
10238 Posts
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Wow. I hope you get your neighbor back, lol. You should walk into their house tonight and stand there staring blankly at all the 'new furniture' qntmfred got you.

[Edited on March 6, 2009 at 12:45 PM. Reason : V I wonder who that could be.]

3/6/2009 12:40:06 PM

qntmfred
retired
41220 Posts
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^^i'm not gonna say who but ONE of us has a habit of leaving the car garage door open with the lights on when she comes home from work at night. i think that'll be checked better too from now on :p

3/6/2009 12:44:11 PM

punchmonk
Double Entendre
22300 Posts
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shit, man. Why do you have to call people out like that? I am sure whoever you are talking about would not appreciate you talking about her like that.

3/6/2009 4:58:46 PM

Wolfood98
All American
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Slave famous that story was fucking awesome!! HAHAHHAHAAH..I feel sorry for that janitor but it was still funny as shit. No pun intended.

3/6/2009 5:19:03 PM

simonn
best gottfriend
28968 Posts
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Quote :
"I don't ever lock my door

But I also live in a town of about 1800"

watch out for the meth fiends.

3/6/2009 8:44:37 PM

Cansnuts
All American
10151 Posts
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i walked in to someone's appartment thinking it was my friend's once... pretty sure i was sober. i just backed away slowly.

3/6/2009 8:46:51 PM

khcadwal
All American
35165 Posts
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i've done this before. it was weird. i was sober, also and during the day but still. it like hurt my head when it happened because i was super confused.

3/6/2009 8:48:57 PM

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