Age old problem. Been seeing this new girl. She has a great job cool as hell really like her but we have not discussed exclusivity. Other girl I was dating before is now just begging for dick and only wants to come over and bang. Should I ride the 2 chicks wave? I'm afraid karma is going to get me.

[Edited on July 23, 2017 at 10:30 PM. Reason : *your]

7/23/2017 10:29:32 PM

The fact that you already feel 'guilty' shows you caught feelings for said female. So there's that.

7/23/2017 10:34:30 PM

I did man. I like her. Fuck you're right

7/23/2017 10:39:58 PM

If you haven't actually discussed being exclusive, you get a free pass for banging other chicks on the side, even if she's been monogamous all along. It's one those few technicalities you can actually get away with, so just be glad that you realized you caught feelings and can break it off cleanly with the other chick before she finds out you're a player. Also, keep your mouth shut.

7/23/2017 10:54:54 PM

I told side piece not to come over. My gut ended up telling me not to do it

7/23/2017 11:06:41 PM

This situation will happen again though. Weird spot to be in

7/23/2017 11:23:56 PM

I think this is the broeist thread in TWW history. Someone prove me wrong.

[Edited on July 24, 2017 at 12:20 AM. Reason : Also weird your favorite thing about your main chick is her job]

7/24/2017 12:20:08 AM

Well when you've been through a slew of unsuccessful women and bartenders it's nice to go out with someone who has their shit together

7/24/2017 12:58:01 AM

Time to have 'the talk' so either way you know where you stand with the new lady. If she wants to step it up, great! If not, you can have your side piece too, also great!

7/24/2017 8:04:07 AM

I like that this thread assumes OPs object of affection isn't going through a dozen dudes a week just because he likes her

7/24/2017 8:39:01 AM

Quote :

"Time to have 'the talk' so either way you know where you stand with the new lady."

I feel that, but "the talk" can be a major turn off ya know?

7/24/2017 9:38:39 AM

Quote :

"It's one those few technicalities you can actually get away with"

Even if you can technically get away with it, she will NEVER let you forget it or live it down as long as you are together. Fifteen years and two kids later, I still like to give my husband hell about it. Just because I can and it amuses me.

7/24/2017 10:02:31 AM

Booty call new girl, if she says no, throw it to girl 2



jk, I don't know the first thing about dealing with two chicks. Been with my wife since I was 15

7/24/2017 10:04:21 AM

Quote :

"I feel that, but "the talk" can be a major turn off ya know?"

More of a turn off than putting your dick on ice while you could be downtown on Other Girl?

7/24/2017 11:13:37 AM

Quote :

"Even if you can technically get away with it, she will NEVER let you forget it or live it down as long as you are together. Fifteen years and two kids later, I still like to give my husband hell about it. Just because I can and it amuses me"

yeah, but that' why I said:

Quote :

"Also, keep your mouth shut."

As long as she doesn't find out about until they've been dating for long enough for it to not matter (prob at least a year or two), he's fine. If she asks him point blank NOW, that's another issue, but going out of his way to volunteer the info isn't a great idea, since 'technically' he didn't do anything wrong.

7/24/2017 11:23:46 AM

Step 1) Invite both of them over
Step 2) Introduce to them the concept of Menage a Trois
Step 3)...

Step 4) Profit

7/24/2017 11:26:08 AM

Quote :

"Well when you've been through a slew of unsuccessful women and bartenders it's nice to go out with someone who has their shit together"

QFT

7/24/2017 11:29:09 AM

Are there any dogs involved?

7/24/2017 11:45:13 AM

Quote :

"Are there any dogs involved?"

If so, get a jar of peanut butter and you can get rid of both broads.

7/24/2017 12:13:56 PM

Quote :

"Just because I can and it amuses me."

this is the most fucked up thing in the thread so far

7/24/2017 12:14:41 PM

I don't understand this bullshit idea of "the exclusivity talk." Do you not ask up front whether your partners are having sex with anyone else? Do they not ask you? That's so fucking irresponsible. When they ask, do you lie or what? Fucking scumbag move. All because you don't like labels or you don't want to settle down. Fucking nauseating.

Like just from a personal health perspective, even, not even considering the compassion and respect you ought to have. Jesus Christ.

[Edited on July 24, 2017 at 12:21 PM. Reason : ///]

7/24/2017 12:20:49 PM

If you're having unprotected sex, then yeah that's pretty irresponsible.

But if you are using protection (the responsible thing to do), it's kind of assumed that you're not blindly trusting the person with your genitals/personal welfare.

At least that's how I've always looked at it.

7/24/2017 1:12:15 PM

Quote :

"Do you not ask up front whether your partners are having sex with anyone else? Do they not ask you?"

I've never been in a point in any relationship where I felt the need to ask those questions. You either know you're exclusive with someone or you don't. If you don't, then you're clueless.

7/24/2017 1:49:53 PM

We are halfway exclusive. We had a STD chat and we've both been tested and are both clean. She is on the pill so I haven't been wrapping up. I didn't fuck the other chick because it would be fucked up to bang someone else then go back and fuck her without being tested in between. She is also responsible about that shit so she's not gonna be banging a bunch of other dudes raw then fuck me. But either of us could wrap up and fuck someone else. So we are exclusive to raw sex but not all sex.

7/24/2017 3:22:28 PM

Quote :

"She is also responsible about that shit so she's not gonna be banging a bunch of other dudes raw then fuck me. But either of us could wrap up and fuck someone else. "

These two points were discussed?

7/24/2017 3:54:30 PM

it was implied through a look

7/24/2017 4:17:46 PM

^lol nice

7/24/2017 4:41:20 PM

Quote :

"But either of us could wrap up and fuck someone else. So we are exclusive to raw sex but not all sex."

you've already got the ideal relationship structure. no need to mess with this.

7/24/2017 4:48:52 PM

Somehow I doubt that relationship structure has been explicitly outlined or you wouldn't be feeling guilt over the side chick.

7/24/2017 5:11:33 PM

It's completely detailed and defined...







In his head.

7/24/2017 5:29:13 PM

Quote :

"So we are exclusive to raw sex but not all sex."

Quote :

"Been seeing this new girl. She has a great job cool as hell really like her but we have not discussed exclusivity."

7/24/2017 5:36:53 PM

Quote :

"Well when you've been through a slew of unsuccessful women and bartenders it's nice to go out with someone who has their shit together"

hmm. maybe this says more about you and your low standards for messy 'relationships' with other women than it says about her actually having her shit together...

7/24/2017 5:55:26 PM

I felt guilty because my gut tells me she isn't banging anybody else.

7/24/2017 6:11:54 PM

salt ITT

let us know how the convo goes

7/24/2017 6:13:24 PM

Quote :

""She is also responsible about that shit so she's not gonna be banging a bunch of other dudes raw then fuck me. But either of us could wrap up and fuck someone else. ""

No the points were not discussed. I was laying in her bed yesterday morning and she made a comment about how she's not used to having a guy in her bed. That it's been a while etc. She isn't a serial whore in my observed opinion. No attention or daddy issues. if she were to fuck someone else she would respect me at least and have him wear a condom. But no, nothing has been explicitly discussed.

Quote :

"hmm. maybe this says more about you and your low standards for messy 'relationships' with other women than it says about her actually having her shit together... 7/24/2017 5:55:26 PM"

Valid point. I haven't made the best decisions in the past. Hence this thread

[Edited on July 24, 2017 at 6:19 PM. Reason : .]

7/24/2017 6:16:39 PM

Quote :

"if she were to fuck someone else she would respect me at least and have him wear a condom."

that's what you'd like to think, isn't it?

7/24/2017 6:28:22 PM

maybe go with: if you are seeing other dudes plz to tell me about it

7/24/2017 8:27:20 PM

^yeah. May have to roll with that. I'll have that convo after we hang out a couple more times.

7/24/2017 8:32:22 PM

turns out, that girl is smath's wife

7/24/2017 8:39:52 PM

Quote :

"turns out, that girl is smath's wife "

7/24/2017 9:19:25 PM

Quote :

"if she were to fuck someone else she would respect me at least and have him wear a condom. "

She's letting you raw-dog it, so you can guarantee she would do the same with someone else. Once they go all-natural, its very difficult to go back.

7/25/2017 9:01:35 AM

Quote :

"She's letting you raw-dog it, so you can guarantee she would do the same with someone else. Once they go all-natural, its very difficult to go back."

Thing is I talk to her throughout the day/until bed every day that I don't see her. People who are out banging other people usually lose contact with you while with other said person. I am fairly certain I am the only guy she is seeing. Which is why I didn't bang the other girl on Sunday night

7/25/2017 9:08:19 AM

Not saying she's banging someone else...just saying that if it does end up happening, there's going to be dick-skin rubbing those walls.

[Edited on July 25, 2017 at 9:13 AM. Reason : .]

7/25/2017 9:12:43 AM

Quote :

"if it does end up happening, there's going to be dick-skin rubbing those walls."

lol 10-4

7/25/2017 9:17:42 AM

7/25/2017 11:28:19 AM

Do the right thing, man, which you have been so far.

Have the convo with her, and if all goes well, stick with her and drop the other one permanently.

Quote :

"If you haven't actually discussed being exclusive, you get a free pass for banging other chicks on the side, even if she's been monogamous all along."

Do not agree. That's mean and ugly. And wrong.

7/25/2017 11:33:54 AM

Quote :

"but we have not discussed exclusivity"

Quote :

" I talk to her throughout the day/until bed every day that I don't see her"

Yeah you're exclusive. Better have that talk if needed sooner rather than later. Wait too long and she'll start wondering what you've been up to once you do bring it up.

7/25/2017 12:06:17 PM

Quote :

" I talk to her throughout the day/until bed every day that I don't see her"

You're either her exclusive partner or her gay bff. Pick one.

7/25/2017 12:12:00 PM

Quote :

"Do not agree. That's mean and ugly. And wrong."

No, it's not 'wrong,' unless you have a Pollyanna, Victorian era view of sex and think that the only 'moral' way to have sex is to practice monogamy. Horseshit.

Is it unethical to sleep with other people when you haven't have an explicit conversation about monogamy? 'Technically', no, but for a lot of people it's either a 'maybe' or a firm 'yes', but those are due to cultural norms/expectations. And like some of us have said, she could very well be doling her snatch out like a revolving door at Sears, because she might be wanting to get away with the same 'technicality'


But as I said, the fact that he'd feel guilty about it shows that there was an unspoken expectation of monogamy. Why? Well, because they probably have feelings for each other and violating that tacit agreement would be a selfish, fucked up thing to do.

Life is filled with 'technicalities' and people get away with them all the time. He actually did the 'right' thing in this case, because he knew if she found out, it would probably hurt her. I even provided a logical 'cop-out' for him to justify his behavior later on if he wanted to and he still didn't take it.




[Edited on July 25, 2017 at 12:18 PM. Reason : .]

7/25/2017 12:13:49 PM

next

7/25/2017 12:40:50 PM