For cases like that, I just tell them to backup their data (or I do it for them) and I reinstall the OS. Nobody's computer is worth 6+ hours of my time hunting down viruses.

Next time, I tell them, use protection.

3/11/2009 2:14:04 PM

Yeah that's what I figure I'll do. I don't think she even has much on it other than some work papers. Besides I'm not even officially IT. I just do it so we don't have to fly our IT admin up from the Atlanta office everytime someone loses connectivity. I know exactly what she did. She got that damn MS Antispyware crap

3/11/2009 2:39:21 PM

I havent used anti virus in like 4 years probably. I know I should use something but no problems so far.


[Edited on March 11, 2009 at 4:23 PM. Reason : ]

3/11/2009 4:21:03 PM

15:02 clear out anything there
15:02 and type:
15:02 \\*******\
15:03 it opens your shared folder and you can drag it to the desktop to create a shortcut.
15:03 K, JUST A MIN.

15:05 WHERE IS THE KEY FOR THE "/" JUST THE OTHER DIRECTION

3/12/2009 3:07:48 PM

Note: All comments are paraphrased and names removed to protect the guilty.

User: Please help, my Verizon Broadband USB Card does not work in my laptop ... but I checked and it works in my husband's laptop just fine, I think a setting on my laptop is broken, but I don't really know how that stuff works anyway. Thanks!!

Me: Um. Ok. *run tests, sure enough can't get it to work no matter what, call Verizon tech support*

Me to Verizon: I've run these tests ... and she SAID it works on her husband's laptop ... however, I can't get it to work, what am I doing wrong?

Verizon: Well, looking at the logs, she hasn't even been connected since November 23. *has me run special utility diagnostics on the card* ... Yep, looks like the card is broken and she was actually pulling a Wifi connection and just thought she was using our service ... I'll ship a new one out to you.

Yup, I figured as much...

3/12/2009 3:36:24 PM

Quote :

"qntmfred NOW HIREABLE 23054 Posts user info edit post no turn it off asap 3/15/2009 10:04:39 PM seedless All American 21341 Posts user info edit post its been for about an hour ow[sic] is it still ok? 3/15/2009 10:05:47 PM"

3/16/2009 3:13:22 AM

http://www.brentroad.com/message_topic.aspx?topic=561440&page=1

what a 'tard

3/18/2009 5:28:01 PM

Quote :

"I havent used anti virus in like 4 years probably. I know I should use something but no problems so far. "

You have at least a 1/2 dozen pieces of malware on your system, guaranteed.

3/18/2009 9:06:26 PM

its very possible. I havent had any problems with my last computer and I have had this laptop for a year and a half and have had 0 problems (have always had adaware and spybot but havent had virus protection)...until my string of bad luck this past week (the internet portion could be related to malware)

-battery died last night (wont charge, says its inoperable)
-my laptop has stopped connecting to the internet

after that I did run AVG and my unused copy of Norton from turbo tax and it came up with nothing and I still havent found a solution to the internet connection. (http://thewolfweb.com/message_topic.aspx?topic=561058)

3/18/2009 9:27:40 PM

viruses are so last decade.

you dont need an AV if you're careful about what you download.

( spyware is another story )



[Edited on March 18, 2009 at 11:34 PM. Reason : ]

3/18/2009 11:33:31 PM

BUt who wants to be careful about what they download?

3/19/2009 12:57:36 AM

this guy today

he was complaining that there were 2 copies of his dock and menu bar on his screen

turns out the n00b had set his desktop wallpaper to be a screenshot of his desktop...

3/19/2009 1:08:24 AM

3/19/2009 6:58:02 AM

Quote :

"viruses are so last decade. you dont need an AV if you're careful about what you download. ( spyware is another story )"

yea I always have kept my spyware. As far as downloading, I am very careful about what I dl and what sites I visit.

3/19/2009 7:45:21 AM

AV programs are a resource hog that often conflict with operations of legitimate programs. their worth no longer even remotely approaches their cost.

I haven't had an AV program for 2 or 3 years. I just use a free spyware sweeper once every few months. and even then, it doesn't ever find anything significant.

3/19/2009 11:24:38 AM

i haven't used antivirus in 5 years. i used to do spyware checks every couple months but haven't had to do that in about 3 years

3/19/2009 11:31:03 AM

well thats why I havent had any on any of my computers for ~4 years

I just installed and ran those this past weekend since I have been having really weird computer problems for the past week. neither of them found anything though.

3/19/2009 11:31:21 AM

malwarebytes ftw

3/19/2009 11:31:37 AM

Quote :

"this guy today was complaining that there were 2 copies of his dock and menu bar on his screen turns out the n00b had set his desktop wallpaper to be a screenshot of his desktop..."

SUP DAWG I HERD YOU LIKE TO ADMIN SO I PUT A DESKTOP IN YO DESKTOP SO YOU POST LULZ IN TECH TALK

3/19/2009 11:44:45 AM

Time to call myself out.

customer couldn't get a 3550 fastE port to link to a 3560 GigE port when both sides were hardcoded to 100/full. Auto/auto on both sides worked fine.

I immediately started looking at PHY level debugging, given that the older 3550 used a broadcom PHY, and the 3560 uses a newer Intel PHY. nothing obvious, no known issues.

Had our co-ops set up a recreate in the lab, I see the same issue, ok time to file a bug (while scratching my head that no one had ever reported this bug before).

I was adding some cables on another recreate, and decided to steal the crossover cable from the aforementioned setup, and nearly shit my pants when i saw the two switches connected with a straight through cable.

durrrrrrrrrrrrr

auto-mdix.

fuck me

Call up the customer, and sure enough, he's using a straight through. I should have had this solved in 5 minutes. And of course the development engineer assigned to the bug laughed at me when i told him what happened.

[Edited on April 22, 2009 at 11:14 AM. Reason : adsf]

4/22/2009 11:13:56 AM

that's pretty funny.

4/22/2009 11:21:28 AM

i've always hated crossover cables

4/22/2009 11:25:33 AM

auto-uplink is one of the best things ever developed for networking

4/22/2009 12:02:24 PM

guy at work: i think my computer is messed up
me: why?
guy: well everything is printing kind of sideways
(i look at printer..about every half inch everything is offset about 1/16 of an inch. everything worked fine a day earlier)
me: computer is fine, printer is messed up. i'll go grab another one
guy: NO, it's not my printer. i mean, look at those lines, it has to be my computer
me: palm face 1
(i bring my laptop over, plug it in, print the same file, have the same result)
me: see, it's the printer
guy: NO, it must be that file you were printing. that file probably has a virus or something
me: palm face 2.
me: just let me try another print real quick to be sure.
guy ok, but i know that's not it
(swap printers..problem is solved)
guy: wtf, why would a bad printer print like that when it was fine a day ago..that makes no sense

palm face 3

4/27/2009 8:35:05 AM

you guys sure bitch a lot about the people that keep you employed

4/27/2009 9:06:12 AM

i'm not bitching

i think it's pretty funny. i don't get why people don't listen to the guy that is getting paid to fix their shit though

4/27/2009 9:15:41 AM

Quote :

"i don't get why people don't listen"

that's really the only "bitching" you're hearing...

4/27/2009 9:32:51 AM

Quote :

"you guys sure bitch a lot about the people that keep you employed"

there are 2 types of IT groups in companies and both aren't always present in all companies - IT groups that support the people that bring in the money and IT groups that bring in the money - it sounds like you've only experienced the former

4/27/2009 9:37:19 AM

Quote :

"auto-uplink is one of the best things ever developed for networking"

For consumer grade networking gear, sure.

It's terrible for enterprise networking gear.

cdubya will disagree if he sees this post

4/27/2009 9:59:19 AM

this is why i live in fiber world. You cant cross fiber (i dont care what the numbnuts that wired my lap say with all the flipped overhead patching..... nothing on earth works passing though that shit so why why why, do the cables exist)

4/27/2009 1:02:51 PM

Time to call myself out. My XP machine at work looks like it has a computer virus. This will be the first computer virus I've ever had. So far random google searches are redirecting to unrelated pages. I can't access the command line or regedit. I have no idea how I got the virus. The machine has anti-virus and anti-malware apps. It's behind a firewall who's settings are best described as paranoid. The sketchiest site I browse on my work machine is TWW. I feel like a n00b.

I'm running full anti-virus scans at the moment and I'm trying to figure out how to regain access to regedit and the command line. I'm hoping that I can save myself the hassle of reformatting, but it's not looking good.

4/27/2009 2:23:33 PM

i mean, does safe mode not even work?

4/27/2009 8:18:03 PM

my xp install at work has gotten so fucked up a couple of times I couldn't start explorer.exe

hd corruption thanks to a bad hdd or bad raid controller

4/27/2009 9:08:27 PM

Quote :

"Note: All comments are paraphrased and names removed to protect the guilty. User: Please help, my Verizon Broadband USB Card does not work in my laptop ... but I checked and it works in my husband's laptop just fine, I think a setting on my laptop is broken, but I don't really know how that stuff works anyway. Thanks!! Me: Um. Ok. *run tests, sure enough can't get it to work no matter what, call Verizon tech support* Me to Verizon: I've run these tests ... and she SAID it works on her husband's laptop ... however, I can't get it to work, what am I doing wrong? Verizon: Well, looking at the logs, she hasn't even been connected since November 23. *has me run special utility diagnostics on the card* ... Yep, looks like the card is broken and she was actually pulling a Wifi connection and just thought she was using our service ... I'll ship a new one out to you. Yup, I figured as much..."

That was funnay

5/9/2009 8:04:33 PM

<input type='text' width=110 name='txtRedirectSearchBox' id='txtRedirectSearchBox' onkeydown="DefaultButtonID='btnSearchBox';HandleEnterKey(event);" /> 
<select name='ddSearchBoxCategories' id='ddSearchBoxCategories'>
<option value='0'>x</option>
<option value='157' >x</option>
<option value='96' >x</option>
<option value='75' >x</option>
<option value='125' >x</option>
<option value='1' >x</option>
<option value='71' >x</option>
<option value='161' >x</option>
<option value='88' >x</option>
<option value='51' >x</option>
</select>
<input type="image" align="absmiddle" name='btnSearchBox' id='btnSearchBox' src='/store/buttons/Panel_Azure/btnGo.gif' onClick="return Button1_onclick();" />

<script language=javascript>
function Button1_onclick() {sQuerryStringValue = document.getElementById("txtRedirectSearchBox").value; 
sCategoryID = document.getElementById("ddSearchBoxCategories").value; if(sQuerryStringValue!=''){ 
location.href ='/store/Search.aspx?SearchTerms=' + sQuerryStringValue  + '&CatID=' + sCategoryID;			
return false; }
else{ 			
document.getElementById("txtRedirectSearchBox").focus();
alert('No search criteria entered.');
return false;} 
}
</script>

5/12/2009 5:33:43 PM

message_topic.aspx?topic=566232

5/12/2009 5:44:32 PM

I keep hearing the phrase "what about a pop-up?" coming from the office next door.

5/12/2009 5:59:45 PM

Quote :

"function Button1_onclick() {sQuerryStringValue = document.getElementById("txtRedirectSearchBox").value; sCategoryID = document.getElementById("ddSearchBoxCategories").value; if(sQuerryStringValue!=''){ location.href ='/store/Search.aspx?SearchTerms=' + sQuerryStringValue + '&CatID=' + sCategoryID; return false; }"

goddammit

5/13/2009 9:51:10 AM

Hello my name is I don't know how to use wait/notify and I make $65/hr. I am a generally grumpy baby boomer with a sense of entitlement and that isn't my job syndrome.

while (running) {
if (this.results != null) {
running = false;
return this.results;
}

try {Thread.sleep(1000);} catch (InterruptedException iex) {}
if (localTimeout++ > timeOut) {
running = false;
}
}

5/13/2009 11:09:04 AM

^where is that from? looks very familiar somehow

5/13/2009 12:50:42 PM

message_topic.aspx?topic=566849



[Edited on May 22, 2009 at 6:16 PM. Reason : .]

5/22/2009 6:16:07 PM

A couple from notalwaysright.com

Quote :

"At Least It Got A Spot-Free Rinse by admin Me: “Welcome to ****! How can I help you today?” Customer: “Yeah, my keyboard won’t work.” Me: “Okay sir, what happened?” Customer: “Well, it got dirty, so I ran it through the dishwasher.” Me: “You what?” Customer: “Ran it through the dishwasher. I did it once before and it worked. So, can I get a new one? "

Quote :

"Sure, But It’ll Make You Yelp by admin Me: “Tech support, how may I help you?” Caller: “I have to pay this fee and I need to get to y’all’s website.” Me: “Sure, our address is [website URL].” Caller: “I don’t want your address. I want to know where to go on my computer.” Me: “Sir, that’s the address of our site. All you need to do is type it in your browser’s address bar.” Caller: “Oh, so do I stick that in my Google?”"

^...just wow

[Edited on May 22, 2009 at 6:40 PM. Reason : dff]

5/22/2009 6:40:11 PM

5/28/2009 8:32:33 PM

^^ On the dishwasher one, out IT guys actually did that to ~10 keyboards and we no longer have beer Fridays

^Haha, that still shows up, check the third entry, too

5/29/2009 8:17:50 AM

GOD DAMN IT. "Can't you just WebEx in and fix it?" is my least favorite line to hear from customers.


Every call today has been like that. "I don't feel like actually trying or listening to your advice, just webex in while I jerk off.".

It's up there with "While I've got you on the line..." and "Nothing changed, it just stopped working!".. <sigh>

5/29/2009 10:02:19 AM

http://apina.biz/17049

5/30/2009 5:57:05 PM

That shit's dangerous, man.

5/30/2009 7:34:33 PM

Complete fake, but funny nonetheless:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y4D2rQFN3z0

What amazes me is companies are willing to pay one person for over six months to fix something that could be solved by one to two weeks worth of consulting. Costs of the consulting are about half that of the salary to pay that one person. Not to mention calculated costs (if you want to add them) of lost business / productivity. All how it appears on the books though.

[Edited on May 31, 2009 at 9:08 AM. Reason : .]

5/31/2009 9:08:13 AM

spoken like a true IBM consultant

5/31/2009 11:05:07 AM

set em up

6/1/2009 2:50:59 PM