Homer- "Dumb it down for me Doc"
Dr. Hibbard- "We are going to cut you open and play with your ticker"

Homer-"... A little dumber"

12/23/2002 5:24:49 PM

Marge: Question 1: Name one of your child's friends
Homer: Lets see uh, Barts friends, well there's the fat kid with the thing, uh, the little wiener who's always got his hands in his pockets!
Marge: They want a name, Homer, not a vague description!
Homer: Okay....Hank?
Marge: Hank? Hank who?
Homer: Hank....Jones!
Marge: Homer, you made that up

[Edited on January 8, 2003 at 6:35 PM. Reason : foo]

1/8/2003 6:34:39 PM

A rude Frenchman? Well I never!

1/9/2003 9:08:00 PM

Any Comic Book Guy quote wins in my book. One of my favorites:

CBG: Oh, Captain Janeway. Lace: The Final Brassiere.
Oh hurry up, I'm a busy man. Ugh, this high-speed
modem is intolerably slow. (The download is interrupted
by a banner advertisement) Hey, what the? Huh, the
Internet King. I wonder if he can provide faster nudity.
(scene changes to Homer's office)

Homer: Welcome to the internet my friend, how can I help you?

CBG: I'm interested in upgrading my twenty eight point eight
kilobaud internet connection to a one point five megabit
fibre-optic T-1 line. Will you be able to provide an IP
router that's compatable with my token ring ethernet LAN
configuration?

Homer: (after long pause) Can I have some money now?

courtesy of http://www.snpp.com

1/9/2003 10:14:19 PM

TV Executive: No, no. Lets try a family that hasn't been on television forever . . . lets try the Simpsons.

1/9/2003 10:23:25 PM

Moe: Well, That's pretty dumb.
Homer: Extended Warranty, How Can I lose?
Moe: Perfect!

1/10/2003 4:37:20 PM

[annoying ass doorbell Marge is trying to fix]...

Your father traded in the tools for M&M's again.

1/10/2003 5:11:56 PM

The key to getting out of jury duty is to tell them your prejudice against all races

1/11/2003 1:18:48 PM

I assure you that nothing can possiblie go wrong. That's...possibLY go wrong...that's...the...first thing that's ever gone wrong...

1/11/2003 1:23:20 PM

German Guy: Gott in Himmel! Who'd've Thought a nuclear plant could be such a death trap!

1/11/2003 1:31:49 PM

Drunk Homer: See the family consists of five people: Marge, Bart, Girl Bart, the one that doesn't talk, and the fat guy, Oh how hate him! [falls on his ass]

1/11/2003 3:43:27 PM

ur monkey bit my kid again

1/12/2003 7:59:52 PM

Stupid Flanders, you're a genieus.

1/12/2003 8:04:00 PM

haha- what was homer's e-mail address?

chunkylover162@aol

haaa.

"favorite book: magazines "

1/12/2003 8:50:27 PM

I thought it was chunkyhomer52@aol.com, but I don't really know.

Do you think that shit's for real?

1/12/2003 8:56:41 PM

as real as homer.

1/12/2003 9:03:01 PM

Whee... http://us.imdb.com/Quotes?0096697

1/12/2003 9:37:52 PM

I thought it was chunkylover52@aol.com. I know the chunkylover part is right, not sure about the number.

1/13/2003 9:18:51 AM

lisa: not so fast, poindexter!

skinner: *gasp* poindexter?!?!

1/13/2003 6:34:06 PM

"tates like burning"

-Ralph Wiggum

1/13/2003 6:35:02 PM

there is a Poindexter in the College of Management

1/13/2003 6:47:13 PM

Marge: Homer sitting that close can't be good for you.
Homer: Talking while the tv's on can't be good for YOU.

1/19/2003 8:08:16 AM

Home Security Guy: But surely you can't put a price on your family's lives!
Homer: I wouldn't have thought so either but, here we are.

1/19/2003 8:13:08 AM

Mexican Version of Millhouse (after being rejected by "Lisabella"): Que malo! Once again I must sugar my own churro!

1/19/2003 8:17:06 AM

"Ralphie, Sarah, it's me, Chief Wiggum"

1/19/2003 1:53:00 PM

Oooooh 300th episode is on next Sunday!

2/9/2003 8:27:01 PM

"The grass is greener on Flanders' side" -- Homer
hehe

2/9/2003 8:30:19 PM

Quote :

"Maybe it's the beer talking, but you got a butt that won't quit"

-Homer Simpson

2/9/2003 9:06:27 PM

the sign outside of the church where Homer threw a kegger:

"Let there be light beer."

2/9/2003 10:18:34 PM

The better sign was "God: The First Tony Soprano" or something similar.

2/9/2003 11:28:33 PM

Flanders: " Oh... why does he always win me over? His darn skull is hypnotic."

Homer: " I just got promoted, and I owe it all to yes-I-cannibis! (walks out of the room) We have a kitchen?!?!?!"

[Edited on February 10, 2003 at 12:00 AM. Reason : second best episode]

[Edited on February 10, 2003 at 12:01 AM. Reason : a]

2/9/2003 11:57:50 PM

FYI: on Letterman in a few, Homer's supposed to read the Top 10 List.

2/13/2003 11:40:48 PM

Top 10 Reasons why Homer is glad to be on Letterman:


hahahah "i'm happy to be re-united w/ my college lover, biff henderson."
" Marge always puts out on vacation."

2/13/2003 11:58:51 PM

Barney:

"r-e-l-a-p-s-e, that's what drinkin' does to me, sock it to me , sock it to me, sock it to me."

2/16/2003 10:05:58 PM

"Lisa's bad dancing is making my feet sad."

2/18/2003 4:23:06 PM

Tappa Tappa Tappa

2/18/2003 4:25:52 PM

Mick Jagger: "Everybody's naughty....and freeze!"

2/18/2003 11:34:02 PM

Ya call that an anchor?!?!

2/18/2003 11:35:04 PM

I cant see through metal, Kent!

2/18/2003 11:36:17 PM

Half of my paycheck goes to Bart. The other half goes to my wife in Vegas. What's left for Moe?

2/18/2003 11:52:58 PM

and close with the matrix

2/18/2003 11:56:09 PM

"hot stuff, comin through"

2/19/2003 12:19:11 AM

"Star wipe!"

2/19/2003 11:01:11 AM

3/3/2003 6:43:05 PM

"The leprechaun tells me to burn things!"

3/3/2003 7:32:34 PM

3/4/2003 5:25:52 PM

Otto: "You know those guitars that are like...double guitars?"

3/6/2003 3:39:42 AM

Moe telling Homer to take off his expensive pants "yea that's right I rob now"

3/6/2003 7:48:12 PM

When I was your age, 50 cents was a lot of money.

Really?

Naah.

[Edited on March 17, 2003 at 11:27 PM. Reason : Do you want to change your name to Homer Junior? The kids can call you HoJu]

3/17/2003 11:26:37 PM

mmmmmm... beer

3/18/2003 12:09:16 AM