the most important thing ive learned from my years of therapy to treat depression (which stemmed from a motor skills imparement which has caused a lot of trouble for me over the years and made me feel quite inadequte at times) is this: think of what you want, what makes you happy, what keeps you stable (not manic), and just go with it. there are always things we want. is that thing realistic? will it benefit you a week from now? a year? a decade?

dont ask too many questions tho, just go with what makes you comfortable.

2/13/2006 11:55:35 PM

Quote :

"I've had pretty bad insomnia and have lots a lot of weight (~20-25 pounds even though my diet hasn't really changed). I also used to love to run and swim, but haven't really felt like I had the energy to do that."

someone may have already said it, but if you don't really feel depressed, then that could be a sign of some other physical malady. You might want to go to a doctor about that (my brother, who may read this, lost a lot of weight, and it turned out he had kidney disease).

2/14/2006 12:00:32 AM

I'd say do a combination of sorts. There were a few mentioned in particular:

1) Get motivated to exercise, and make sure to eat at least somewhat healthy. Make sure to eat breakfast. Cut out caffeine, drink water.

2) See a physician first. Don't go to the Student Health Services - if your parents are truly concerned and if you don't have health insurance (I don't know if you do, but 'if'), ask them to foot the bill.

3) If the doc rules out all the physical, ask him/her for a referral to a psychiatrist/psychologist. Make sure it's someone that you feel like is actually listening to you. My mom is seeing one for anxiety/depression and she's mentioned a few times that it doesn't seem like he's actually listening.

4) Considering your history you might want to check symptoms of post-traumatic stress syndrome. My mom lost her sight over time, and it's been difficult for her to deal with that, I'm sure.

It is easy to not notice what's going on with yourself, with outsiders noticing pretty easily. If depression is pretty rampant in your family, it's worth a serious consideration, as you are doing. Keep in mind too that depression is much more common in women, so the fact that more of the family that were listed in your post were women kind of tells me it might not be as much of a family issue as they seem to think it is. However, you mention your grandfather's problem, so...

Look at your family and how healthy they are. If they're healthy, and tend to be pretty happy, but are still on anti-depressants, then I'd be concerned more than if they are unhealthy or have rough relationships. It seems like in that situation they're more likely to be depressed for reasons other than activities/emotions that contribute to depression.

But anyway the combination of what various other posts suggested seems to be the best way to go.

My husband has trouble getting to sleep. He eventually does, so it's not insomnia, and he hasn't exercised regularly in quite some time. He has anxiety, and has some depression now and then. If he exercised he likely wouldn't have that problem much.

2/14/2006 12:39:14 AM

I don't know. I think if you told us more about what you were doing in your life, we'd be able to better detemine (not like we're professionals, though). Sometimes a lifestyle change (getting a job, changing schools, etc), can cause a sort of depression. You may even be seasonally depressed.

2/14/2006 7:29:23 AM

Since it's fairly present in your family, I'd go see a counselor. That person generally will have a good sense of whether it's just current stress or ongoing depression.

If you said you had gained 20 pounds, I'd me more inclined to say it's stress, but since you lost that much w/o working out or eating differently...that's pretty scary

See what suggestions the doc has to work on your mood and health before going on medication. Maybe an exercise regimen or a class would reconnect you socially and rejuvenate you physically. Maybe you need talk therapy.

I would not pursue medication until you've been comfortable w/ your doc for several months, and have tried other options. Each medication can help some, but it can take years to find the one that's best for you, since you can't just go on&off them like you can with other types of medicine.



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2/14/2006 8:37:59 AM

I didn't read most of the replies...

Your parents are probably overreacting somewhat, but it's only because they care. I mean, flying out from CA for the weekend just to run a depression-intervention? That's love. It couldn't hurt to take some time out and talk to someone - just start with them the way you did here. It doesn't have to be a professional, although if you choose to go that route there are plenty available.

From personal experience ... if you don't feel like there's someone you can tell anything and everything to (excluding parents and other relatives) then that's probably a good indicator you've closed yourself off.

2/14/2006 8:02:01 PM

so if you go to a headshrinker and he says you're fine, then what?

your parents are douchers?

2/14/2006 8:46:06 PM

first of all, how often do you see/talk to your parents?
I understand they are your parents and they think they know you best... but a lot of people once they hit college... especially after starting grad school... only talk to their parents maybe once a month.
Maybe they are overreacting and are upset because you don't call all the time.
Second of all, having spurts of depression is common in college because you are making life altering decisions and changing a lot...
And if you are going to talk to someone, see a psychologist, not a psychiatrist.... if the psychologist thinks that you are depressed and need to be on medication they will recommend you to someone who can help with that.
As for the insomnia and lack of energy and stuff... go get a check up with the doctor... get checked for anemia while your at it. I started having some similar problems and it turns out that I am anemic.
don't stress out about it though, it'll make you depressed.

2/15/2006 8:28:46 AM

Well, it appears that my parents' researching capabilities suck ass, for after 2 months of talking to people, getting referrals, and all that other jazz, they ended up scheduling me an appointment with a QUACK. I walked out of there knowing nothing more than I did when I went in there, and this asshole kept trying to put stuff in my head and try to get me to accept things that simply weren't true. Hell, I think I learned more about the illness by reading on the Internet, as he was trying to let me know about it instead of trying to tell me if I show any signs of it.

He tried to get me to admit that I had a bad childhood (ages 3-14) and that my parents were responsible for my "current illness." I respectfully disagreed and we almost got into a fucking argument about how him know he is right.

Now, realizing that you can get a bad egg every now and then, I politely asked him if he could recommend anyone else in the area that he maybe met at medical conferences, etc... and I learned that he wasn't even a doctor, but a licensed social worker who took some psychology courses in college (gg, parents, on your fabulous research). I think my acting shocked that he wasn't a real doctor (and I even used the term "real doctor", I think) pissed him off. But fuck if I'm going to spend $100/hr talking to someone who can't do a goddamn thing about it.

4/21/2006 7:25:53 PM

^That's funny! If you can't laugh about that, you are depressed.

4/21/2006 8:32:56 PM

that reminds me of when I was a kid and was hearing voices, so my parents took me to this expensive shrink and he kept asking me if my parents fought.... and I kept telling him they didnts...which they dont. but he would not get off the subject, and he kept asking my parents the same thing too
As if that could be the only cause

4/22/2006 2:00:26 AM

i didn't read your first post but read the last one (where you are currently)...

all i can say is that depression is an evaluation of your current state of mind...that means the last 5 seconds or so...anyone can have the capability of being on cloud 9 (whatever the hell that is) and then dropping to the lowest emotional state...it all has to do w/ the foundations of what you build your emotions around (and the stability or the fragility that those foundations provide)...

nevermind, went back and read the rest...

from a personal standpoint, i can say that it's never good to say, "my siblings (relatives) were f'ed up, so i'll be f'ed up too"...you are an individual, and it makes no difference about them...you're the one that's here, you are the one that has to survive, end of story....i've wanted to end shit (life) plenty of times...i'm sure many people on here have......however, you start to realize (and i'm sorry if this sounds cheap) that you have to "get busy livin' or busy dyin.'" find the things that you love, the things that you are passionate about and go after them without consequence...it's difficult to be depressed when you're that focused on what you desire in life...

4/22/2006 2:31:26 AM

I went to get a normal physical and a routine checkup, and after the doctor finished checking my vitals and fondling my testicles (it was a he ), i asked him about what's been going on, and he gave me a little questionnaire that had about 30 questions on it. He added up some numbers and found I was "low" on two different neurotransmitters (one was seratonin i think). From my responses, my seratonin levels rang up as "2" on his scale where he said normal people are typically around a "10."

So he prescribed me some medicine called Lexapro to take for a period of no less than one year, and also some Xanax if I ever feel myself super anxious (had a bad experience with it last week, thought I was having a heart attack).

Today is day 4 on the medicine, so we'll see how things go in the next few weeks or months.

6/5/2006 7:27:05 PM

ummm I know this might be an asshole thing to say, rather it is gonna be an asshole thing to say...

but, first, were you the one drinking in said accident in 2000?

6/5/2006 7:49:33 PM

nah i wasn't drinking. it was some middle aged, lower class piece of white trash in a pickup truck who was drinking.

6/5/2006 7:53:17 PM

my parents think i'm insane - should I commit myself?

6/5/2006 7:57:53 PM

ahh ok, good, otherwise I was gonna say perhaps alcohol was the root of most of your problems....

that said, or rather removed, cut any drinking you do, down a lot and take your meds EXACTLY how they tell you too (probably with food b/c the shit will cause indigestion and heartburn like you wouldn't believe) missing a day or 4 (spread out even) will slow the drugs effectiveness

6/5/2006 7:59:25 PM

omg, lexapro sucks

[Edited on June 6, 2006 at 1:08 AM. Reason : and missing a day or 4 a few times in a row will fuck your shit up big time ]

6/6/2006 1:08:30 AM

I have been wondering about Lexapro and its effectiveness.

I currently take 15 mg of Lexapro daily, along with 300 mg Wellbutrin XL.

I've taken Prozac and Luvox, with Luvox seemingly the better of the two, and it seems that Lexapro just doesn't seem to work as well.

Or is it my imagination?

6/6/2006 2:26:11 AM

Quote :

"I went to get a normal physical and a routine checkup, and after the doctor finished checking my vitals and fondling my testicles (it was a he ), i asked him about what's been going on, and he gave me a little questionnaire that had about 30 questions on it. He added up some numbers and found I was "low" on two different neurotransmitters (one was seratonin i think). From my responses, my seratonin levels rang up as "2" on his scale where he said normal people are typically around a "10." So he prescribed me some medicine called Lexapro to take for a period of no less than one year, and also some Xanax if I ever feel myself super anxious (had a bad experience with it last week, thought I was having a heart attack). Today is day 4 on the medicine, so we'll see how things go in the next few weeks or months."

Wait, you spoke to a normal physician and he prescribed you anti-depressants based on a questionnaire?

And you're okay with that?

6/6/2006 3:41:01 AM

It sucks being the baby of the family....it is like you can never ever really leave the nest.

6/6/2006 4:01:22 AM

the first time I ever got in trouble when I was 17, my mom came up to me and was like "I looked at your baby pictures earlier today, and I asked myself, "What happened?".

Talk about the mother of all stab wounds.

But anyways, I can't really help you with seemingly appearing glum and all, but all I can say is that my sister, who is 23 and one year out of college and almost one year into her career, seems to be acting the same way, if I read you correctly. Perhaps its just the reality of the working world, growing up/maturing, or moving into the next phase of life after college, but whatever it is, I don't think you are the only one of your kind, and that its got to be normal for people your age.

As for the "stab wounds", you should talk to your folks about what they said and how it truly makes you feel. If you guys can at least get a grip on each others feelings and their mechanics, you'll feel better. I'd do something though because only a change can remedy the situation

6/6/2006 5:14:52 AM

^true that roddy, my sister went to college out of state but now that I want to leave NC my folks are giving me shit left and right

6/6/2006 5:15:55 AM