Quote :

"I don't think a hallucinogen is a good idea, because it's illegal and is likely traceable back to him"

What if it came from something that wasn't illegal that you could buy from a store? There's plenty of things out there that shouldn't be ingested, but people have and started freaking out b/c of it.

7/1/2009 1:54:34 AM

the problem with using a hallucinogen is that pretty much all of them are incredibly, incredibly bitter.

7/1/2009 2:44:53 AM

so i guess the question is, what are the odds this guy eats something again after being a douche...and what if you plant something and he doesn't eat it

7/1/2009 2:47:29 AM

plan b needs to consist of catching him in the act and kicking him in the nuts

7/1/2009 2:56:45 AM

what if HE doesn't eat it but a likable coworker does

7/1/2009 2:57:04 AM

wouldnt be very likable after stealing food

7/1/2009 3:00:25 AM

if we're doing illegal stuff, make a batch of pot brownies

7/1/2009 7:59:36 AM

Laxatives would have an easy excuse though for being in your food if the coworker goes to the boss; you've been constipated and were just trying to be able to go to the bathroom again.

Boss cannot blame you for that, and coworker becomes the focus of who's at fault. Preferably, he calls them an idiot.

7/1/2009 8:16:21 AM

Laxative chocolate chip cookies ftw.

7/1/2009 8:23:57 AM

PUT A FAKE SPIDER IN YOUR FOOD.

7/1/2009 8:26:22 AM

you must work with Slave Famous, he does this shit all the time

i'm voting ipecac+laxative+a chemical castrator+capsaicin extract

it shouldn't kill him but, dear god, he'll wish it had

7/1/2009 8:29:04 AM

Quote :

"it shouldn't kill him but, dear god, he'll wish it had"

Dramatic emphasis added for the inevitable shit on the wall and puke on the floor.

7/1/2009 8:57:12 AM

don't do hot peppers! he'll take one bite, realize it's hot as shit, and stop eating. then he won't ingest enough laxative to have him pooping all day

7/1/2009 8:58:20 AM

I heard that consuming Visine makes you vomit or have diarrhea

7/1/2009 9:05:42 AM

my diet cokes keep getting taken out of the communal fridge, so I wrote our Vice President's name on them, and now they go untouched. Of course, if he happens to notice them, then I guess I'll be sharing my diet cokes with him

7/1/2009 9:20:18 AM

^^unless you have an old bullet from WWI lodged in you, then Visine will kill you because it mixes with the lead in your body (from the bullet) and kills you instantly

(thank you CSI)

7/1/2009 9:20:38 AM

make a dish full of bhut jolokia peppers
the hottest peppers in the world. that would teach his ass a lesson...literally






over 1,000,000 Scoville Units

7/1/2009 10:43:53 AM

^ seems great.

7/1/2009 10:46:01 AM

capsaicin extract > bhut jolokia

7/1/2009 10:53:27 AM

but thats not a pepper...

"In 2007, it was confirmed by Guinness World Records to be the hottest chili in the world, replacing the Red Savina. Disagreement has arisen on whether it is a Capsicum frutescens or a Capsicum chinense. Some claim it is a C. frutescens,[3] but recent DNA tests have found that it is an interspecies hybrid, mostly C. chinense with some C. frutescens genes.[4]"

7/1/2009 10:57:44 AM

I like the idea of putting another decoy in there with my name on it. Might make it more enticing for him to eat the nameless one.

7/1/2009 11:03:06 AM

it's been said, but damn, do you work with Slave Famous?

and yes, decoy is keeeey.

7/1/2009 11:19:11 AM

did you do it today?

7/1/2009 11:21:01 AM

nah, not yet. I got home late last night and didn't feel like it. Tomorrow will be the day.

I'm only concerned about how this will affect my karma. I've been on a pretty good roll lately and would hate to jeopardize it.

7/1/2009 11:23:55 AM

k let us know what you come up with & the results

this should be good

oh and try to not get arrested or anything

7/1/2009 11:30:48 AM

you're good. cause really you're adjusting their karma.

7/1/2009 11:33:45 AM

Castor oil would be your best bet. It can work almost immediately if you take a tablespoon of it.

Or just slip some roofies in your food. Not that you would have access to those or anything...

7/1/2009 11:37:10 AM

Quote :

"this sounds like the prequel to another djeternal loses his job thread"

7/1/2009 11:38:17 AM

so I would lose my job for someone else eating my food?

7/1/2009 11:41:23 AM

sleeping pills are legal. how boring is your job?

7/1/2009 11:45:07 AM

very boring.

7/1/2009 11:46:07 AM

might be fun watching him try to stay awake during a board meeting. plus, he might not suspect a thing and play it off as not getting enough sleep the night before, which would leave him open to more pranks in the future.

7/1/2009 11:48:19 AM

sleeping pills are a stupid idea (i mean maybe, but seems like a downgrade, and probably not a great idea to give someone something strong enough that it would be effective)

spicy but not too spicy + laxative seems like the best idea. mexican food makes sense... it can be greasy (and will be) with all that castor oil. Maybe a simple pasta dish with extra spicy italian sausage and castor oil/spices in the noodles. He'll eat the hot sausage and will relish the cool noodles containing the active ingredient even more. He probably won't even notice that they taste... off.

[Edited on July 1, 2009 at 11:56 AM. Reason : d]

7/1/2009 11:55:00 AM