If she's just trying to get rid of the V-card, then ok, I guess.

But if she's looking for more and you're not, be fair with her.

9/1/2009 10:18:33 PM

Quote :

"or that matter, how could you do that? There is no way I could just "dip it" and not keep going."

yeah, if I had a guy pull that shit on me, I'd tie him up and rape him. That's just evil.

He mentioned that he started doing it as revenge for girls in high school teasing him to that point.

9/1/2009 10:20:09 PM

Revenge?

Unless there's something else at play here, I'm willing to bet he's a premature ejaculator and trying to bs around it

9/1/2009 10:22:11 PM

Quote :

"my question is: How exactly do I seduce her?"

Quote :

"Subway!"

Chicks dig places where they make the food in front of you.

9/1/2009 10:22:59 PM

I think that varies from person to person man...

9/1/2009 10:30:48 PM

I see.

9/1/2009 10:31:49 PM

Dunno, never slept with him, tho not for lack of trying

9/1/2009 10:32:10 PM

How do girls fail with getting guys in bed?

9/1/2009 10:43:36 PM

^lol, i wonder the same thing.

9/1/2009 10:44:58 PM

You know what I hated?

The "dead fish."

When they lay there and not do a god damn thing.

9/1/2009 10:49:01 PM

Apocalyse, how come women let you do more and more stuff for the first 3 months to a year, then they start taking stuff away until you're happy if you get plain missionary once a week?

And is there a way to reverse this process or do you just have to get a new one?

9/1/2009 10:49:23 PM

ugh i think you should throw that one back paul

9/1/2009 10:55:14 PM

There's a variety of reasons for that Paul.

But the root of it is that is she having fun too? Maybe she's trying something new to see how it goes, or maybe she's interested in you, but not the sex so much.

The way to reverse this is to take her to Blockbuster and go to the soft porn section. She'll ask you what you're doing there and you can flirt with her and say, "Are you curious?"

Now, she will be. But she might be embarrassed. This is ok! because you're going to pay for it up front without her being there. So tell her to wait outside while you take care of this.

Take it home, watch it with her, and you will find that she's curious about a lot more positions and techniques and trying certain things out.

That's a path I would take.

[Edited on September 1, 2009 at 10:59 PM. Reason : Oh yeah! and let her choose the video.]

9/1/2009 10:55:37 PM

Quote :

"Apocalyse, how come women let you do more and more stuff for the first 3 months to a year, then they start taking stuff away until you're happy if you get plain missionary once a week?"

do you only have sex with people you are in long relationships with?

9/1/2009 10:58:39 PM

no... paul, you just aren't buying her enough stuff now



[Edited on September 1, 2009 at 11:00 PM. Reason : or you're getting lazy and she isn't interested]

9/1/2009 10:59:43 PM

I have considered that some soft core porn might be a good jump start for her. I got that idea when we saw Watchmen, and she got all horny when we got home, that movie has a pretty good sex scene in the middle. Your words are wise indeed.

saw this after I posted

Quote :

"do you only have sex with people you are in long relationships with?"

Yes actually. I'm not christian or anything, but that's how I am.

[Edited on September 1, 2009 at 11:04 PM. Reason : added stuff]

9/1/2009 11:01:38 PM

Yeah same here!

Watch True Blood with her... and evaluate it's effect from that.

9/1/2009 11:03:23 PM

Quote :

"do you only have sex with people you are in long relationships with?"

Fuck. That. Shit. I used to be like that, but it seems as you get older no one seems to care. I had a girl that I went to watch "The Hangover" with just as a friend that i've known for 2 years, after the movie we went back to my place to watch "How I Met your Mother" (We have like 4 seasons saved on the computer hooked up to the 48" tv here.) and without any sort of hugging/cuddling halfway through a show she just jumped on top of me and threw her shirt off. After a few minutes we were doing the nasty on the couch.

I didn't mind at all.

9/1/2009 11:19:10 PM

what if you had drunk sex with someone and now you regret it

is it okay to cry rape??!

9/1/2009 11:19:47 PM

Quote :

"How do girls fail with getting guys in bed?"

complicated... he contacted me thru an online dating site but won't meet people from the internet... took me 3 months to get his number, and 6 to get him to get coffee with me, and by that time he had a gf The entire time we flirted and exchanged dirty pics, but still no dice.

still working on him. maybe I'll get some "dipping" since it wouldn't be "intercourse" so it wouldn't really be "cheating"

[Edited on September 1, 2009 at 11:33 PM. Reason : k]

9/1/2009 11:32:03 PM

haha wow

9/1/2009 11:32:51 PM

I would kind of drop him after that.

Sounds shady to me. He probably had his eyes on something else, and you were the next best thing in case that fell through.

Unless... you were just after him for the sex. Other than that, I'm sure you'll find other guys more than willing to have sex with you who won't "dip" and call it "revenge" after just "dipping."

9/1/2009 11:39:23 PM

^I know this is an advice thread but I sure as hell didn't ask for yours, microdick.

9/1/2009 11:41:35 PM

so much hate itt.

9/1/2009 11:43:46 PM

Alright, this is like 90239th time you've tried to call me out on something, but if you want to do this... Let's get this over with so that you can move with your life.

Does that sound ok to you?

9/1/2009 11:43:53 PM

I don't want to talk to you, I didn't ask for your condescending dickish advice, so just fuck off.

9/1/2009 11:46:25 PM

woah

woah

woah

is there a problem ITT?

9/1/2009 11:50:44 PM

Then don't don't post in this thread, that's all there is to it.

But you want to attack my penis size and all. I'm sorry it isn't anything compared to your collection of black dildos or anything, but that shouldn't concern you because we dated for ONE MONTH. Might I add, it was SEVEN YEARS AGO.

I'm sorry if I treated you like crap at the time, I really am and if it's any consolation, there were things on in the background I had to get figured out not to mention that I was failing college, failing family, and failing... period.

But I've had my time to get it sorted out and now I'm ok! But you for some reason are not.

SEVEN YEARS AGO.... it's time to let that shit go...

9/1/2009 11:51:28 PM

Dr. Knockboots?

9/2/2009 12:02:21 AM

shit just got real..

9/2/2009 12:05:52 AM

Once a douchebag always a douchebag. You're STILL failing, you're just failing to see that as well.

And I liked what people were saying in this thread, which was why I posted in it. I was hoping that with my recent hostility towards you you would keep the peace and NOT put your worthless $.02 in. I know what I'm doing. If I really wanted advice, I'd make a whole thread and attentionwhore about it like I do every other relationship.

[Edited on September 2, 2009 at 12:07 AM. Reason : ]

9/2/2009 12:06:28 AM

hm must be some kinda background drama or something. sylvershadow really seems to not like this apocolypse dude

[Edited on September 2, 2009 at 12:08 AM. Reason : .]

9/2/2009 12:07:26 AM

why do yall gotta act like dicks towards eachother

im such a big fan of civility in break ups this sort of shit is childish as hell

9/2/2009 12:09:52 AM

Keeping the peace by calling me names?

Then you're in MY shit, saying I need to stay out?

OK Jess, you did not just come off unreasonable there.

Alright, i get it... I'm a douchebag...

But don't egg me on and say you're trying to keep some sort of peace.

Now, I have a great idea! An olive branch that will help both of us.

Why don't we both ignore each other, until we both go away.

9/2/2009 12:11:21 AM

ITT?

9/2/2009 12:11:22 AM

^^^Well she wants some sort of closure I'm sure.

SEVEN YEARS AGO!

[Edited on September 2, 2009 at 12:14 AM. Reason : Get Met... sheesh]

9/2/2009 12:13:04 AM

9/2/2009 12:14:19 AM

Dumbass, I was trying to ignore you.

you're the one who responded to my post, Carl. yes, I posted in your thread, but not in response to any of your posts.

your response to my post was inane and insulting, like I'm some child that doesn't know shit about guys and relationships, so of course I insult you back. Sorry the truth hurts you so much.

^ ps, WTF animal is that??

[Edited on September 2, 2009 at 12:20 AM. Reason : df]

9/2/2009 12:18:18 AM

I apologize if what I said was insulting.

Not my intention.

Are we ok now?

9/2/2009 12:20:50 AM

^^dog duh

9/2/2009 12:21:23 AM

^LOL WAT

9/2/2009 12:22:14 AM

yeah sorry, not up to par on my animal genitalia.

I do know that marsupials have bifurcated penii and vaginas, and ducks have corkscrew shaped penises and vaginas and have been scientifically recorded having homophilic, necrophilic sex (male duck screwing dead male duck).


PS-- Carl, you're a wuss and you cave in too easily.

[Edited on September 2, 2009 at 12:25 AM. Reason : hahahhaaaa]

9/2/2009 12:25:02 AM

idk i guess to me its common sense...other than horses what else is there porn of?

i am jealous of your animal penis knowledge. and i just want to tell this carl guy that i too cave in too easy and am a giant pussy

9/2/2009 12:27:58 AM

No seriously,

I was an asshole and that's bound to make folks a little upset for awhile (or in this case, 7 years)

So I just want to put it past and let things be.

[Edited on September 2, 2009 at 12:32 AM. Reason : a]

9/2/2009 12:28:36 AM

you guys should fuck and get it over with already. i thought you were married, apocalypse. why let yourself get so worked up over what you claim is nothing?

9/2/2009 12:42:31 AM

^Almost had me trolled.

9/2/2009 12:43:34 AM

nah, i think you already got trolled ITT

9/2/2009 12:45:36 AM

^can tell you how much of a pussy i am...i'm such a woman

9/2/2009 12:47:56 AM

Apocalypse,

I dated this girl about 7 years ago for about a month. And now I created this thread on the interweb about relationship advice and all she does is troll it. What do you think her problem is and what can I do to make her go away

thnx

9/2/2009 12:48:39 AM

set em up

9/2/2009 12:50:47 AM