No one would believe that I was getting married because they know I can't even get a boyfriend....and if I said I was preggers they would call me a whore and cut me out of their lives.

11/13/2011 10:41:17 PM

life lesson

cousin aka best friend doesn't include you in her wedding party
accept and move on

be grateful you don't have to spend all that cash on bridal shower, bach party, etc
be grateful you realized your BFF is actually just a casual cousin


/winning

11/13/2011 10:42:43 PM

Quote :

"be grateful you don't have to spend all that cash on bridal shower, bach party, etc"

also, this

11/13/2011 10:44:10 PM

I was about to say "man, that would suck to not be invited to a cousin's wedding", but then I though "wait, that happened to me"

The good news is that I'm great friends with said cousin and love to play with her kid now

11/13/2011 10:45:11 PM

i think it's kinda silly and stupid to say that you won't even go to the wedding if you aren't a part of her wedding. i mean, she probably has several close friends, maybe a few sisters, maybe her husband has a sister or two - you can't honestly expect that you get a spot in her wedding simply because you are such close friends (and cousins).

i mean geez, she said she wanted you to read scripture at the wedding - that means she is recognizing your relationship and feels that you deserve a place in the wedding, so she's giving you a role. that says a lot.

she could have just sent you an invite and been all herp derp about it. that would have made me question our friendship. but this? pssh, you're being dramatic.

11/13/2011 10:48:59 PM

well...I mean yeah...I'm happy I'm not going to have to drop a couple hundred on this now...but at the same time it's like a slap in my face


someone that has meant so much to me my whole life doesnt even want me there....I mean people thought we were twins when we were younger...we did so much together but I now know that I mean nothing to her....

and I just found out that she has asked my brother to be ushers in the wedding...

FUCK THAT.


[Edited on November 13, 2011 at 10:55 PM. Reason : ]

11/13/2011 10:50:23 PM

the scripture reader position is so not cool

I hear ya sawa

also....ugh I'm so tired I'm not sure why I thought I would drive in from Atlanta and go straight to the NCSU game tonight.

11/13/2011 10:52:15 PM

ushers are on the same level as reading scripture or greeting people/handing our programs, those are spots for people you wanted in your bridal party but didnt have room for, or for family members that are special to you.

11/13/2011 10:52:18 PM

your decision on whether or not to attend this wedding will be based solely on the venue having an open bar, just like every other friend and family member.

11/13/2011 10:52:27 PM

sawahash, honey - i don't mean this the wrong way....but having been in the bride's position, i'm going to be honest.

the way that YOU feel about your relationship with her is not necessarily the way SHE feels about her relationship with you.

she might have a lot of close friends/relatives that she ranks higher than you. it sucks, but that's how it is.

[Edited on November 13, 2011 at 10:53 PM. Reason : .]

11/13/2011 10:52:30 PM

she said she might want me to read the scripture....she has one sister her fiance has no sisters...call me crazy but I always thought that family came first, expecially family that was so close, but all this does is just enforce the feeling I've always had that I have always come 2nd to my family...but me being treated as just some other person that she invites to her wedding makes me feel horrible and I would rather not go than have everything slapped in my face saying "it wouldn't really make a difference to me if you came or not"



and when i say ushers I mean like groomsmen...you know the ones that are the equivilent of bridesmaids...


and knowing that she doesn't think highly enough of me for this breaks my heart.

In my opinion...the scripture reader is the part that you give to the family member that you just feel obligated to give a part to...like I don't really want her in my wedding but it would make me look bad if I didn't include her in the wedding so I might as well ask her to do this...no one else wants to do it

[Edited on November 13, 2011 at 10:59 PM. Reason : ]

11/13/2011 10:56:08 PM

Does she have friends outside of the family? If so, those friends may come first, then family second. It really just depends on her personal priorities.

ALSO, if you were invited in the first place, it means you're important. It's typically $100 per wedding guest! You don't invite just anyone to a wedding.

[Edited on November 13, 2011 at 10:58 PM. Reason : d]

11/13/2011 10:57:20 PM

ah, yes, that is different

ushers are just people who seat the guests

11/13/2011 10:57:27 PM

Quote :

"the way that YOU feel about your relationship with her is not necessarily the way SHE feels about her relationship with you."

THIS.

Also, if you have a lot of shit going on right now in your life, she may thing she's doing you a favor by asking you to take on a role with less responsibility.

11/13/2011 10:58:09 PM

sarah, this is HER day.

when it's YOUR day, you can bitch all you want.

let your cousin have her day, be happy for her, and seriously - stop acting like you're entitled to be in her wedding. it comes across as though you want a place in her wedding because you know you won't have your own wedding.

11/13/2011 10:58:39 PM

okay so I'm a horrible person for being hurt that she might want to include me on her wedding day.


I guess that's why I have always been the black sheep of the family.

11/13/2011 11:02:05 PM

there is no problem with being hurt, it happens to everyone


there is a problem with being hurt and then having a tantrum about it and not attending the wedding because you didnt get what you wanted.

11/13/2011 11:04:14 PM

You're taking it incredibly personally and making assumptions about what she's thinking and how much you mean to her without actually voicing your concerns to her. Or so it seems. I'd think if she meant a lot to you, you'd give her a little more benefit of the doubt or at least ask her about her feelings before getting so hurt.

11/13/2011 11:05:10 PM

yeah
what elise said
aaaaand what skwinkle said

[Edited on November 13, 2011 at 11:05 PM. Reason : .]

11/13/2011 11:05:16 PM

because she will be hurt if I don't show up...because she will notice if I'm not one in the crowd standing there awing over her...because anyone in my family will notice

11/13/2011 11:06:10 PM

dude
seriously

just being invited to a wedding speaks volumes

having been in that position, starting with a list of 300+ people and widdling it down to a manageable (aka affordable) number - be happy you'll be on the guest list

geez lady

11/13/2011 11:08:10 PM

then what's the point of not going?

is it going to make you feel any better?

her day may not be made worse by you not attending, but if you guys mean that much to each other it will be made better.

11/13/2011 11:08:44 PM

It's gonna cost her money for you to be there. So you mean at least $100 to her!

11/13/2011 11:08:55 PM

only because I'm her first cousin...that would be the only reason I'm included...I've not come to realize that if we weren't related I wouldn't even be given to privilage of even knowing her.

11/13/2011 11:09:42 PM

One of my best friends didnt have me in his wedding party, I damn sure still showed up and had an awesome time and didn't bitch about it. It is her wedding and her day let her pick who she wants and just be happy for her.

11/13/2011 11:09:43 PM

you not showing up to her wedding may be something she never forgives you for.

do you even know for certain that she has bridesmaids?

11/13/2011 11:09:53 PM

Yeah...I know for certain...she just told me...she is having her sister and then 9 of her friends as bridesmaids


I'm not even in her top 10 people she wants around.


Another one of my first cousins that lives out in Nevada got married last summer...I was not at all upset over not being part of the wedding party...I was very happy to be invited and asked to be there on that day...I bought a plane ticket and came out just to see the wedding
but I also didn't see that person as a huge part of my life that I spent so much time with every chance I got....this is me now knowing that I obviously don't mean as much to her as I thought I did

[Edited on November 13, 2011 at 11:16 PM. Reason : ]

11/13/2011 11:11:58 PM

dude, seriously - IT'S HER DAY, and you need to get over the fact that you aren't part of the wedding party


but not so seriously, if you aren't in the Top 10, then i suggest you mail her a box of poop

11/13/2011 11:14:06 PM

stop being such a whiny ass drama queen.

11/13/2011 11:15:33 PM

she's doing you a favor then. a wedding party of 20+ will take two hours or more to take wedding pictures. That's time you could be drinking during the reception.

11/13/2011 11:15:55 PM

^^that's what i wanted to say, but i was afraid someone would come in here calling me a bitch

[Edited on November 13, 2011 at 11:16 PM. Reason : .]

11/13/2011 11:16:07 PM

In that case, be glad you're not a bridesmaid.

You'd be stuck buying a hideous $300 bridesmaid dress that you'll never wear again. You'd deal with the headache back-and-forth emails about what dress is the least ugly. And with 10 bridesmaids, there will be some fights over which dress is least hideous.

And you'd get stuck spending thousands of bucks on wedding-related activities.

Unless you like throwing money down the toilet, be glad you're not a bridesmaid.

11/13/2011 11:16:36 PM

lol, just be glad you dodged the bullet

[Edited on November 13, 2011 at 11:18 PM. Reason : just out-dress em if your feelings are still hurt]

11/13/2011 11:17:04 PM

Quote :

"In that case, be glad you're not a bridesmaid. You'd be stuck buying a hideous $300 bridesmaid dress that you'll never wear again. You'd deal with the headache back-and-forth emails about what dress is the least ugly. And with 10 bridesmaids, there will be some fights over which dress is least hideous. And you'd get stuck spending thousands of bucks on wedding-related activities. Unless you like throwing money down the toilet, be glad you're not a bridesmaid."

Gee thanks Lucy!

You could have just said NO!

11/13/2011 11:18:30 PM

You're obviously not as close to her as you thought and I think you're probably exaggerating your relationship with her just to have something to get all dramatic over. If you really were her girlfriend, you'd have been a part of the entire planning process and would have known why you weren't in the wedding party and why you "might" just do a scripture reading. Stop being such a suck hole.

11/13/2011 11:19:01 PM

whooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

11/13/2011 11:19:28 PM

Quote :

"SUCH A SUCK HOLE"

i can't stop laughing, omg erica i lurve you

11/13/2011 11:20:36 PM

the most retarded wedding I was ever a groomsmen in involved 14 bridesmaids, 2 co-brides, the bride and groom, and 6 other groomsmen. The rehearsal and after-wedding pictures were a royal clusterfuck. At first it seemed kind of cool to have a bridesmaid in each arm walking down the aisle, until you get to listen to them bitch at each other about which side is their good side and how my posture needs to be slumped over when walking to make their arms look skinny. Then we have to go over all of this again right before the wedding since their wearing different height heels than they did at the rehearsal.

I would have been happy to have sat in the back of that wedding and snuck out quickly thereafter.

11/13/2011 11:25:15 PM

I mean really, is anyone surprised that she wasn't asked to be in the wedding with all of this boohooing and "threats" to not attend?

11/13/2011 11:25:39 PM

what the fuck is a co-bride?

11/13/2011 11:26:09 PM

wow...there are some bitches up itt...

"I'm sorry that you feel like your cousin just gave you a slap in the face"

"I would be feeling hurt too if you felt like you were really close to someone and that happened"

"I know you're going through a lot of hard things right now and you are feeling extra sensitive, so a situation like this just seems worse than what it really is"


I guess shit like that is just too much to ask for...

[Edited on November 13, 2011 at 11:31 PM. Reason : I got too mean there...sorry]

11/13/2011 11:26:14 PM

did you read this that I posted on the last page?

Quote :

"and maybe it isn't that people don't give a shit about your cancer, maybe it's that they don't know how to talk to you about it. it really sucks that you have cancer, and i wish i could make it better for you, but maybe people are more comfortable embracing the good things happening in her life than they are talking to you about the rough stuff you are going through. i know i have avoided discussing things in my past because they made me feel uncomfortable. hopefully people will see that you are hurting and need them in their own time, but it never hurts to ask for help if you need it, even if it's just telling someone you are scared and asking them to talk to you about it. if they say no, then yeah, they are jerks."

11/13/2011 11:28:22 PM

You're always hurt by something. Shit gets old.

11/13/2011 11:28:37 PM

wow
way to take the high road sawahash
i gave my opinion and you got wicked personal

i hope that "cancer" doesn't kill your self esteem, or kill you for that matter

11/13/2011 11:28:58 PM

I'm still not sure what a co-bride is supposed to be. for this particular wedding, it involved three year old girls in wedding dresses running laps through the aisles of the church.

11/13/2011 11:30:05 PM

Yeah, everyone was pretty nice to you except for me.

11/13/2011 11:30:07 PM

oh, ive always heard them called miniature brides

11/13/2011 11:30:33 PM

Co bride: more than one bride getting married
Miniature bride: little girls dressed in white dresses

11/13/2011 11:30:37 PM

co-bride = Sister Wives

11/13/2011 11:31:05 PM

Quote :

"co-bride = Sister Wives "

11/13/2011 11:33:49 PM