I treat confessions with the upmost respect.

7/29/2012 10:58:07 PM

Quote :

"On a couple of recent occasions I have eaten my own jizz after I masturbated. I did this mostly for reasons of novelty: my sex life is nonexistent, so when I want to get freaky or spice things up I have very few options. And the idea sort of excited me, so I tried it. But it got old after the second or third time, and I feel no desire to do it again. Nevertheless, I have developed some understanding of chicks who don't like to swallow. Jizz doesn't taste bad (it's just kinda salty) but the texture is nasty. It's not a solid or a liquid: it's just fucking slime. The next time I get head, if the chick says "Don't cum in my mouth" I'll probably blurt out "Oh, don't worry. I hear ya" and she'll be like "WHAT?" and throw on her clothes and storm out."

So it's okay not to swallow ladies. I thought ladies always went all the way down to avoid the "slime"

7/29/2012 11:43:06 PM

what the actual fuck is this

7/29/2012 11:44:55 PM

Don't hate you don't get the confessions of others that are sexual in nature, because you judge.

7/29/2012 11:47:14 PM

like i give a shit

that is WEIRD

oh i dont get laid ever and jerking off is boring so I'll just EAT MY OWN CUM

7/29/2012 11:48:32 PM

In the light of giving jizz.

Quote :

"In anticipation of sex or receiving head, I make sure to double up on water intake. I also eat about 5-7 servings of fruit, my favorites being mangos, papayas, pineapples, blueberries, strawberries, bananas, and nectarines. Eating a lot of these ~12 hours before the act helps "sweeten" the juices. Once I had a girl ask for a second serving because she never thought it could taste sweet. True story."

I can vouch, as I drank 12 pineapple juices before coming home to see my gf at the time. Great tip TWW user!

7/29/2012 11:48:42 PM

Guess someone isn't getting a lot of head, especially if he plans 12 hours ahead of time for it.

7/29/2012 11:52:06 PM

Maybe he was looking out, and wanted to give her a treat.

Some of us aren't just whores, giving our dick out whenever the mood strikes. We try to only deal with folks we care about.

7/30/2012 12:01:55 AM

Quote :

"In response to bmel, I mentioned ~12 hours because that's about how long it takes before your body fully absorbs the sugars. You can't just eat a bunch of sweet/acidic fruits minutes before the deed and expect your juices to be a delightful cocktail. I simply incorporated a high fruit intake as part of my routine diet so I was always ready. Nice stab at me though "

7/30/2012 12:03:22 AM

nvm then, carry on.

[Edited on July 30, 2012 at 12:05 AM. Reason : nvm]

7/30/2012 12:04:03 AM

Ok my turn

Confess.

7/30/2012 12:05:36 AM

At least he's getting some and not eating his own jizz

7/30/2012 12:06:01 AM

Quote :

"I haven't been physically intimate with anyone since August of 2010 and for reasons best left alone that might be a good thing. "

And it's not because you were in prison right?

I was talking to a guy for awhile ago when he told me he had been abstinent for 10 years. He was a good looking guy with great sense of humor and conversation, I thought it was a bit odd. He later confessed to me he was in prison for 9 years. Makes sense now! I asked him, well what about the first year you were out? You could have banged chicks and chose not to? His reply was, well I wanted to approach dating differently now. I've been there done, that...the one night stands and everything. But the next girl I sleep with will be the mother of my children.

7/30/2012 12:20:58 AM

you didn't end the conversation immediately after finding out the dude was in prison for nearly a decade?

standards.

7/30/2012 9:46:27 AM

How judgmental can you be? Despite his mistakes in life, I came to find that he is actually pretty good guy, with good upbringings. He went to school for veterinarian medicine but did not finish when he became addicted to drugs. I consider him a good friend now, nothing more.

I never dated this guy. But I think people deserve a second chance depending on the circumstances.


And...inbox

Quote :

"I still can't discuss my sexual activities with a professional (doctor, nurse, whatever) without being about two seconds away from giggling my ass off. "

[Edited on July 30, 2012 at 11:10 AM. Reason : .]

7/30/2012 11:09:37 AM

I'll fully admit, i'm pretty judgemental on a person's past.

The best indicator of future behavior is past behavior. Yes, people do change, but that's the exception, not the rule. I see far too many people who get in a serious relationsihp or married to folks with serious flaws and think they can change that person or they'll just grow out of it. Too many fish in the see to hope for a black swan.

[Edited on July 30, 2012 at 2:36 PM. Reason : .]

7/30/2012 2:30:20 PM

9 years is a long prison sentence to not have incurred some manner of fucked-upness, either before or during the sentence.

7/30/2012 2:32:48 PM

I know somebody that got 9 years for accessory to 2nd degree murder.

plus when he got out after the 9 years, he was back in prison like a year later for 2 years for check fraud

[Edited on July 30, 2012 at 2:37 PM. Reason : f]

7/30/2012 2:36:44 PM

she never dated the guy, she gave him the benefit of the doubt and got to know him, found out he really was a decent guy (despite the shady past) and got a really great friend out of the whole situation.

so it sounds like judging someone based on a few facts (which ultimately add up to maybe 10% of the whole story) would have cost her a good friend in the long run, and she's probably glad she didn't go that route and actually got to know the guy. rather than, you know, assuming the mistakes he made in the past are the sole thing that define him as a person today.


gee that sounds oddly similar to another story i've heard recently

7/30/2012 2:39:11 PM

imagine that

7/30/2012 2:41:35 PM

i'd think serving prison time that's a pretty substantial portion of your entire life to that point would be pretty prevalent in defining said person.

7/30/2012 2:46:10 PM

i'd say that knowing a person spent that many years in prison is at least worth hearing the story and determining if it's REALLY something that defines them. rather than assuming 9 years in prison equates to BAD BAD MAN.

9 years could easily have been a manufacturing/selling drugs kinda thing. it could also have been a bar fight that went on too long, resulting in the other guy dying from injuries sustained during the fight - BAM manslaughter charge. of course it could also mean he murdered his ex wife and dumped her body in a lake somewhere, but without a body they couldn't make a good enough case, so they cut him a deal for a guilty plea, resulting in only 9 years for murder


i watch too much true crime reality TV

7/30/2012 2:50:26 PM

In the case of the guy I know, 9 years for accessory to 2nd degree murder= he was with a friend, friend carjacked another guy, shot the guy/left him to die.

They got caught. The guy I know refused to snitch on his friend. He got 9 years for being an accessory. Snitches get stitches.

But the 2 years for check fraud was all him

[Edited on July 30, 2012 at 2:59 PM. Reason : f]

7/30/2012 2:58:29 PM

damn, i can't even imagine going to jail, much less prison.

i mean damn, the first time i was even in a cop car was just a few weeks back. and that wasn't even because i was in trouble


~~~~~~

oh yeah, confess to me if you want

7/30/2012 3:05:45 PM

^^Sounds like he's either a complete dumbass or there is more to that story (either way he's an idiot).

No fucking way I would protect someone who robbed/shot/killed someone. Anyone who would do that is no friend of mine.

7/30/2012 3:08:58 PM

This is key to the story

Quote :

"Snitches get stitches."

7/30/2012 3:10:30 PM

Not if dude's in jail.

Like I said, there has to be more to this story.

7/30/2012 3:11:58 PM

Quote :

"9 years is a long prison sentence to not have incurred some manner of fucked-upness, either before or during the sentence."

As part of the bargain, he went through drug rehab during the sentence, otherwise it would have been 11 years total. The main reason why I didn't start dating him, was the stipulation that the next girl would be the mother of his children. That's too much pressure. I'm way too selfish right now to marry or have a child. Maybe that statement wasn't serious and he was just trying to impress me.

Also...I can't trust that he is completely clean, although he says he's been tested for everything. I think we are just better off as friends anyway.

7/30/2012 3:50:00 PM

prison gay

7/30/2012 3:53:46 PM

taking afternoon and pre-dinner confessions....eat in comfort that the world knows nothing

7/30/2012 3:55:24 PM

^lol

7/30/2012 3:57:03 PM

Pm me confessions based god

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

7/30/2012 6:21:10 PM

Quote :

"I think Krallum is annoying."

Not a very nice thing to say

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

7/30/2012 6:43:53 PM

Quote :

"the gay guy who works in my apartment complex office told me this afternoon that he had to run off 3 people from the pool yesterday afternoon because they were FUCKING. 3 people fucking in broad daylight in a public pool, i mean who does that? then the guy says to me, "i know right? wait til it's dark and the office is closed, then you go right ahead and handle your business boo, don't nobody care and can't nobody see you." so i asked about the "Dawn to Dusk" rule, and about the key card used to get into the pool - i mean, when you swipe your card to open the gate, don't they keep track of that somewhere? then they'd know who comes to the pool after dark, probably doing the naughty and stuff. then he says to me, "honey they don't track that shit. those cards ain't even linked to your apartment. psssshhiit naw." now all i wanna do is go fornicate in my pool around 2am "

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

7/30/2012 7:11:46 PM

I'm curious as to 1) Why there were an odd number of people fucking and 2) Why anyone would ever swim in an apartment pool with all the fucking that apparently goes on.

7/30/2012 7:15:22 PM

and did you seriously think they track pool use? what the hell are you doing at the pool that would make you so paranoid

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

7/30/2012 7:19:13 PM

followup

Quote :

"duh, it was a 3some. 2 girls and a guy, mid to late 20s apparently. and i thought chlorine killed all the bad stuff "

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

7/30/2012 7:23:00 PM

Quote :

"yeah i totally expected that they would track that key card because it gets you into the pool gate, but also into the weight/workout room and the little business office area that has a computer and a printer. so yeah, tracking that key card makes a whole lot of sense. "

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

7/30/2012 7:39:08 PM

Quote :

"BOB is gonna get a serious workout tonight. "

too bad, cause I'd give you a serious workout!

[Edited on July 30, 2012 at 8:05 PM. Reason : ]]

7/30/2012 8:03:33 PM

I'll be taking confessions now!

7/30/2012 8:41:31 PM

I will make your confession feels loved, and shared among friends.

I look forward to your late night confessions of truth in a world not prepared for such delights.

7/31/2012 12:39:11 AM

7/31/2012 3:11:46 AM

Quote :

"Part of me is concerned about the relationship my boyfriend has with his (female) best friend. They have been friends for years, with nothing ever between them. They both say that it is a brother sister relationship. I want to talk to him about it. I want to be sure. But part of me is scared. I don't want to be a person that gets in the middle of that, and I don't want to be that type of girlfriend that won't let her boyfriend have female friends. I like both of them a lot. I have few insecurities in my life, but I think my biggest is always feeling like I'm never good enough for the person that I am with. That is probably why I feel insecure about the relationship between the two of them. Is this crazy?"

7/31/2012 11:28:59 PM

I feel like the thing to do is to talk to them both about your misgivings so that they don't continue to bother you. Making them aware of your feelings isn't the same as forbidding their time together.

8/1/2012 12:51:27 AM

threesome.

8/1/2012 7:33:31 AM

If they haven't fucked, they want to.

8/1/2012 7:44:15 AM

Quote :

"Just made an agreement with my boyfriend that if he went and got me cupcakes, I would give him head. The joys of long-term relationships. "

This whole trading favors for sexual favors has success written all over it.

8/2/2012 9:14:11 PM

in the workplace its called quid pro quo

and we have to watch a stupid video about it every 6 months

8/3/2012 3:10:22 PM

CONFESS!

i have an hour til Madagascar 3

8/4/2012 11:48:02 AM

You've pretty much told every secret anyone confessed to you in the past, so I'll do everyone a favor and advise against that. Sorry.

8/4/2012 5:36:36 PM