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 Message Boards » » that bill brasky was a real son of a bitch Page 1 2 [3] 4 5 6 7 ... 24, Prev Next  
poopface
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The only reason Sodomy is illegal is because Brasky pattented it

3 for Brasky!!!!

[Edited on October 5, 2004 at 4:23 PM. Reason : sdf]

10/5/2004 4:22:47 PM

saps852
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He broke his own neck on a bet once. And I'll be damned if he wasn't fine the next morning and $20 richer to boot!

10/5/2004 4:25:24 PM

Snewf
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Back in 1916, the world was honoured to have Brasky's left lung host the Summer Olympic Games.

10/5/2004 4:25:33 PM

poopface
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During the Chicago blizzard of 86' Brasky wrote the meaning of life in the snow with his urine, he killed and ate everyone who read it. When they asked him why, Brasky said he liked his food enlightened with the ultimate truth.

10/5/2004 4:26:24 PM

saps852
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When Brasky shoots skeet he doesn't use clay discs, he uses dining room tables, although he does toss in the odd bald eagle.

10/5/2004 4:26:27 PM

Snewf
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So one time Brasky and me are walking down a street in Ottawa in the middle of winter and we notice an ice sculpture contest going on. Now, Brasky is quite an artist and this just called to him so we went down to the ice and picked out our spot. Brasky then kicked a hole in the ice, threw me in it and left me there till I had reached a state of suspended animation. He then pulled my frozen body from the water and set me out for the judges to see. When the judges asked him what I was he said I was like a chocolate Easter bunny with a creamy filling. Sure enough he won the event and sent my frozen body to Alaska where it took 8 months for me to thaw enough to move. God how I hate that man... but I respect him.

10/5/2004 4:27:31 PM

poopface
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Brasky once ran in place and spun the earth the oppisite way

10/5/2004 4:27:36 PM

Snewf
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For his grade 9 science fair project, Brasky filled a helicopter with vinegar and dropped it onto the alkali flats, causing a massive explosion. He finished second behind the girl who studied chipmunks.

10/5/2004 4:28:54 PM

packguy381
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Quote :
"During the Chicago blizzard of 86' Brasky wrote the meaning of life in the snow with his urine, he killed and ate everyone who read it. When they asked him why, Brasky said he liked his food enlightened with the ultimate truth."



thats gotta be my favorite one.

10/5/2004 4:29:00 PM

poopface
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Braskys chest hair is like one of those 3D image pictures, If you look at it just right you see a black man eating ham

10/5/2004 4:29:05 PM

saps852
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best thread ever

hands down

10/5/2004 4:30:59 PM

poopface
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Brasky once impregnated a rainbow, thus creating skittles

[Edited on October 5, 2004 at 4:31 PM. Reason : ghjgh]

10/5/2004 4:31:06 PM

Snewf
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Bill Brasky is, without a doubt, the most beautiful bastard to walk God's green Earth.

10/5/2004 4:31:38 PM

poopface
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Brasky makes it a point to wipe out one species of animal a year, just to show all the other animals who's boss

10/5/2004 4:31:49 PM

saps852
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Brasky can move faster than the speed of sound when he spots a virgin in a bar - she doesn't hear him introduce himself until AFTER he's impregnated her!

10/5/2004 4:32:23 PM

Snewf
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Bill Brasky once pitched the script of "Good Burger" to Nintendo as a possible video game idea. When they rejected it out of hand, he reportedly drove a Hamburger-shaped car through the front of corporate headquarters and fled the scene. He is, as such, currently wanted for questioning in the state of California.

10/5/2004 4:32:46 PM

poopface
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Brasky invented the worlds first vibrater. It was powered by a wind mill

10/5/2004 4:33:25 PM

saps852
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The character of Lando Calrissian was based on Brasky. George Lucas liked Brasky's style, attitude, and the fact that he lived in a city in the clouds.

10/5/2004 4:34:03 PM

poopface
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Brasky's hand strength is incredible, if he squeezes a diamond in his palm it turns back into coal

10/5/2004 4:34:33 PM

Snewf
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Did I ever tell you about the time Brasky and I were on a Casino Bus? We got into a traffic jam, and Brasky, being the man that he is, swallowed the driver whole. He then proceeded to drive the bus at uncanny speeds in the oncoming traffic lane until we reached our destination, and I'll be damned if he didn't get awarded for his bravery.

10/5/2004 4:35:28 PM

poopface
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The British accent is actually caused by Brasky punching every Englishman in the mouth once a week

10/5/2004 4:35:47 PM

Snewf
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Bill Brasky's toe nails have been used to replace tiles on the space shuttle.

10/5/2004 4:37:14 PM

poopface
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Bill brasky has the last few drops of Christ's blood, he keeps em in an old visine dropper, then he offers anyone with sore eyes to use it and laughs hysterically when they scream from the pain of getting blood in their eye. The bastard must have gotten me 5 or 6 times with that one already.

10/5/2004 4:37:27 PM

PrufrockNCSU
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This one time me and my girlfriend were at dinner at Chili's, and who's at the bar, but Brasky. And he's drunk, and you know what I mean when I say Brasky was drunk. He'd apparently been drinking jaeger through his nose with a straw so it would get to his brain faster. He won a fifty dollar bet on that too when he put down more through his nose than the rest of the bar, but that's another story. So Brasky see's us, and he shouts clear across the restaurant to me and then remarks about my girls hot looking ears. Brasky takes her in the john and fucks her in the ear for a good two hours while I eat chili con queso and drink my mega-rita. She comes out deaf in one ear, and pregnant. And I'm stuck raising Brasky's bastard son. Here's to Bill Brasky!

[Edited on October 5, 2004 at 4:39 PM. Reason : I dyslexic am.]

10/5/2004 4:38:17 PM

poopface
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Did I tell you about the time Brasky wrestled Godzilla? Half way through the match they both called a truce and started making love right there! Yeah, and I`ll be damned if not a week later ol` Godzilla gave birth to a miss Tina Struthers. -he never did care for Mothra though...

10/5/2004 4:38:35 PM

Snewf
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He scored 1800 on his SATs... and he skipped the math part.

10/5/2004 4:39:39 PM

poopface
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Bill Brasky was born 8 1/2 months premature. Even then he was strong enough to tear his way ot of the womb with his bare underdeveloped hands. Then he circumsized himself with hedge clippers. No one knows to this day what a pair were doing in a delivery room

10/5/2004 4:39:51 PM

kbbrown3
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personally i don't care

10/5/2004 4:40:28 PM

saps852
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Brasky invented the concept of profanity one time when he broke both his arms bear wrestling and needed a way to hurt people when he couldn't just sock them in the mouth!

10/5/2004 4:40:40 PM

poopface
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The other day Good ol' Bill showed me this list he has of people he is going to kill. I commended him on his damn fine handwriting, and then the sweet bastard moved me down a few places. Nicest man i ever met

10/5/2004 4:40:42 PM

Snewf
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Brasky's birthday is a national holiday in Portugal.

10/5/2004 4:41:52 PM

poopface
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Brasky used to be a super hero, but he never wore a cape. He considers them to be queerish. At least that's what he told me when he was raping my uncle

10/5/2004 4:43:07 PM

Snewf
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He uses Grand Central Station as a summer home. It is closed to the public during the month of August.

10/5/2004 4:43:26 PM

saps852
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According to historical documents, Brasky is still technically at war with England, Japan and Bob Barker.

10/5/2004 4:43:29 PM

Snewf
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So Brasky and I go out to bar one night. We search for a place all night and come to a vacant lot, and he says "Well here we are." We wait there for a year and a half, and sure enough they start building a bar right around us. Once the bar opens, we order a shot each and drink it. After that Brasky nurns the place to the ground, while yelling over the fire "Always leave things the way you found them".

10/5/2004 4:44:29 PM

saps852
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Bill Brasky sleeps eight hours a day. Well I guess he's pretty normal in that respect.

10/5/2004 4:46:19 PM

poopface
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I ran the idea past Brasky at lunch a few years back of making the game "Monopoly", he said he was more of an "Operation" fan. He then proceeded to knock me unconcious with the bowl of after dinner mints and conduct open heart surgery right there in the restaurant. And I'll be damned if he didn't add prid-near 30 years onto my life. Then for the hell of it he held my face in the lemon water until I lost paid for dinner.

I love that man.

10/5/2004 4:46:34 PM

Dammit100
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Brasky is currently ranked 18th in the AP College Football poll.

10/5/2004 4:46:57 PM

Snewf
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He once rode upon a steed perchance to spy a lady

10/5/2004 4:47:06 PM

poopface
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Well, I'm in Corpus Christi on business a month ago, and I had this eight-foot tall Asian waiter.. which made me a little curious, so I asked him his name, and sure enough it's Ho Tran Brasky!

10/5/2004 4:50:41 PM

saps852
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He invented the pony by compressing a horse in his mighty palms!

10/5/2004 4:51:12 PM

Snewf
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Well, anyway.. he shows up at the church in his golf pants, caked in mud. Well, ol' Bill Brasky pushes the priest aside and says, "I'll baptize that piece of calamari!" Then he pours Scotch all over my baby son and says, "There! You're baptized!"

10/5/2004 4:51:49 PM

poopface
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Brasky was a strict vegan for 4 years. But then his bloodlust had gotten so worked up that he ate his entire left arm and most of his thighs. But damn-it-all-to-hell if they didn't regenerate back twice as strong as before

10/5/2004 4:52:46 PM

saps852
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The Munsters is loosely based on Brasky's bout with crabs in the late 50s.

10/5/2004 4:53:20 PM

Snewf
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Did I ever tell you about the time Bill Brasky sold me into slavery?

He puts me on a ship to Thailand, right? And I'm chained to a pipe. Meanwhile, ol' Brasky, he's back in the States siring three beautiful children with my wife!

10/5/2004 4:53:32 PM

poopface
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Brasky got a letter from the IRS saying he owed 30 years of back taxes. But he noticed there was a typo in his name... it said Phill Prasky...Anyway, so Brasky sent them a letter telling them he was Bill Brasky and Thumb-up-an-ass if he didn't get a letter the next day containing an apology and a check for 3 billion dollars from the YMCA

10/5/2004 4:53:40 PM

Snewf
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Did I ever tell you about the time Brasky and I went hunting?

Brasky decides he's going to hunt down all four of the 'Banana Splits.' He stalks and kills every one of them with a machete. They all begged for their lives... except Flegal.

10/5/2004 4:55:03 PM

amandaonx
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That guy shoots whiskey into his neck with a syrringe!

10/5/2004 4:56:04 PM

Snewf
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Bill Brasky accidentally hit me with a 20 lb sledge hammer... the very next day I cancelled my appointment with the chiropractor.

10/5/2004 4:59:04 PM

saps852
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SET THEM UP

10/5/2004 5:03:49 PM

 Message Boards » Chit Chat » that bill brasky was a real son of a bitch Page 1 2 [3] 4 5 6 7 ... 24, Prev Next  
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