I would love to be on Tool Academy.

[Edited on November 12, 2009 at 11:54 AM. Reason : http://memory-alpha.org/en/wiki/Section_31]

11/12/2009 11:54:22 AM

Quote :

"I hit on you too much and I bet it makes you uncomfortable some times. "

Quote :

"I was in an abusive relationship for about 2 years. She hit me, I hit her, and we argued pretty much daily. That was the lowest part of my life thus far."

11/12/2009 11:54:34 AM

Quote :

"i've hooked up with six wolfwebbers "

11/12/2009 11:54:51 AM

Quote :

"i seriously wanna know if saps and sawahash had nub sex"

yeah, that's not going to be exposed, no ones business.

11/12/2009 11:56:13 AM

You basically just admitted to it right there.

11/12/2009 11:56:32 AM

Quote :

"Every girl I've slept with I've ended up in a long-term relationship with. I've only slept with two girls. It depresses me greatly. "

11/12/2009 11:56:35 AM

Quote :

"I have had several girlfriends that I date for periods of one year or longer who I never informed my parents about because I knew I was just going to break up with them sooner or later. If I was going home to visit my family I would lie about what it was just so the girl wouldn't ask to come. "

11/12/2009 11:57:50 AM

Quote :

"At the last place I lived I had a neighbor with a 16 year old daughter. I used to watch her laying out in the back yard in her bikini."

Quote :

"I'm getting close to searching online for a love interest."

[Edited on November 12, 2009 at 11:59 AM. Reason : .]

11/12/2009 11:58:29 AM

Quote :

"I have a really weird mole right next to my private parts. I think it grosses people out."

11/12/2009 12:01:24 PM

Quote :

"my brother and my cat both like this guy that I have a crush on and that alone makes me want to seriously date him "

11/12/2009 12:02:14 PM

send me confessions

11/12/2009 12:02:36 PM

Quote :

""

11/12/2009 12:04:05 PM

Quote :

"i take daily dumps at work but when I take a really big one (e.g. today's two solid 1ft logs at once) I do not flush because I want others to come in and see what I have created. I know no one suspects me because I'm a smaller person compared to most of those here."

11/12/2009 12:04:35 PM

^ that's just wrong (and i hope they were lying)

11/12/2009 12:06:09 PM

Quote :

"I want to date a woman, just to see what it's like. And to determine if I'm really straight. "

Quote :

"i am in love with my boyfriend. he hasn't said "i love you" yet, and i don't want to say it first, so i'm keeping quiet. "

11/12/2009 12:07:04 PM

^^no, that's hilarious

when I was working at the Rec Center, someone had taken a dump in the women's bathroom that was so huge, it wouldn't go down (keep in mind the toilets are automatic flush). I called in all my co-workers (without telling them of course), and showed them that huge piece of shit. we all were like "what woman could produce that?! someone gave birth to a shit baby!!" we kept opening and shutting the door, trying to get it go down. it was like a game - shut the door... would it still be there when the door openend?!

it was HILARIOUS

[Edited on November 12, 2009 at 12:13 PM. Reason : .]

11/12/2009 12:09:17 PM

Quote :

"I think about killing myself every few days. Not in the "I am going to go through with this" way, but more like the way one thinks about an aspiring goal that they'll know they will never achieve, like building a house or running a marathon. I'm too much of a pussy to do anything, and that makes me even more pathetic. I also like to think about how friends and family would react if I died, and if many of the people who I would consider to be my acquaintances would really care."

11/12/2009 12:11:09 PM

Quote :

"the maintenance guys just came by, and I was sitting on the couch in my underwear. i knew they were just going to walk in the door anyway and i didn't have time to run to my room, so i just answered the door anyway. awkward"

11/12/2009 12:12:01 PM

^^there have been no less than 10 of those kinds of confessions in this thread. it's rather lame if you ask me.

ooh, shock value!!!!1 give me a break

11/12/2009 12:12:22 PM

don't hate

11/12/2009 12:14:00 PM

Quote :

"It would be a huge turn on for me to fuck a girl in front of a crowd of people. "

11/12/2009 12:14:16 PM

Quote :

"I like to get really wasted or stoned and talk to Mom on the phone. She has no clue. And it's so much easier to talk to her while drunk. "

11/12/2009 12:16:19 PM

Quote :

"In college I pretended to be interested in one of my TA's just so he would help me with the class. After I passed the class I called him one time for directions to a party and then stopped talking to him. It was fun stringing him along"

Quote :

"I have a deep desire to see my girlfriend get fucked by other guys. I also have a deep desire to have her watch me fuck other chicks."

11/12/2009 12:16:42 PM

Quote :

"I feel as if humans are not really living up to their potential as a species, and in that regard we're a great failure to either whatever spirit exists above, or to the fortunate series of events that gave us a gift of life. This makes me loathe everyone in some way or another."

11/12/2009 12:17:33 PM

i can has confession?

11/12/2009 12:20:37 PM

Quote :

"I hope the next guy I date is freaky and not afraid to admit it. I'm tired of vanilla all the time but I feel weird bringing up anything because I don't know how he'd react. Maybe they feel the same way because I don't exactly seem like the type."

Quote :

"I wish DJE would quit already. He's past the mark he set for himself. GTFO"

Quote :

"I have thought that my boyfriend may be an alright candidate for the Tool Academy. "

Quote :

"Part of me feels bad for hacking into your computer and watching you on your webcam, but it was incredibly arousing and I'd probably do it again if I had the chance."

11/12/2009 12:20:47 PM

this thread leads to VERY interesting PM conversations

gg evan. you get my vote for best thread of 2009

11/12/2009 12:22:41 PM

Quote :

"I had unprotected sex with a stripper in Canada "

11/12/2009 12:25:27 PM

This thread is awesome. Much better than working.

11/12/2009 12:26:18 PM

dude jam up my inbox

last pm i got was [fag]god[/fag] being an asshole

11/12/2009 12:27:29 PM

Quote :

"I had about 10 orgasms last night. "

11/12/2009 12:28:01 PM

Quote :

"at a low point in my life i had an adultfriendfinder account"

11/12/2009 12:28:10 PM

Quote :

"I used to grow pot in two of my closets when I lived alone. I went on a vacation for 5 days one time and when I came back the light to my flowering grow room was on, and I never turn it on. I freaked out, harvested what I could and destroyed all I could, even a 4ft plant that was ready to move into the next cycle. I didn't sleep for a week."

Quote :

"My best friend stayed at my house a few years back and on our network I found two sex tapes he had made and copied them to my hard drive. Every so often I make comments to him about certain traits of his that I should not know just to throw him off guard. For example, how his dick makes a sharp left turn. We're talking almost like a candy cane."

Quote :

"i'm sad that i am not as e popular as you "

Quote :

"i am really worried that the wolfwebber that i dated is the one who spread the HPV. it was two years ago but i feel like i should get tested now "

11/12/2009 12:28:40 PM

Quote :

"i used to get boners all the time when i worked at carmicheal"

11/12/2009 12:30:58 PM

send me your confessions people!!!

11/12/2009 12:32:45 PM

Quote :

"This summer I was on a trip with some family out west. It was getting towards the end of the trip and I was running out of money, but we stopped at a Pizza Hut to eat. When the bill came, my friends gave me money for their food and went outside. The money they gave me didn't cover everything, so I just left a 10 on the table and ran outside, and kept all the money they gave me."

11/12/2009 12:33:52 PM

Quote :

"During my worst days with bulimia in college, I spent 5 hours a day at the gym. And I was able to identify all the other exercise bulimics. I think we all were somewhat competitive with one another over who worked out the longest."

11/12/2009 12:50:01 PM

Quote :

"To BettrOffDead: he's the best... at being a big jerk who's stupid and his big ugly face is as dumb as a butt. "

11/12/2009 12:50:07 PM

awwww

11/12/2009 12:51:08 PM

haha

i thought script at first, but its actually a user tag




[Edited on November 12, 2009 at 12:54 PM. Reason : ]

11/12/2009 12:51:50 PM

Quote :

"I've made my current girlfriend have over 25 orgasms. I've also been unable to make a woman orgasm before."

11/12/2009 12:52:13 PM

Quote :

"I'm interested in a twwer now but the confessions thread has seriously creeped me out because I don't want to get involved in the weird "everyone's done everyone else" thing this place has going on."

11/12/2009 12:54:08 PM

Quote :

"i want to have anal sex, but my boyfriends all have had huge penises. and none of them ever brought up the subject, and i never wanted to bring it up because i didn't want them to think i was dirty. i feel dirty just sending you this confession "

Quote :

"My dad is getting pretty old and he's a huge fisherman so I bought a boat ASAP right out of college and I'm now in debt bigtime. But I didn't want to wait until he was too old to fish with. I'm still resentful of it, and it's setting me back pretty big financially. "

Quote :

"When my ex broke up with me I slept with her 4 best friends just out of spite. "

11/12/2009 12:57:08 PM

^ those aren't good "best friends"...

11/12/2009 1:01:12 PM

ready for confessions

11/12/2009 1:02:00 PM

everyone knows that bitches be trifflin'

11/12/2009 1:02:38 PM

Quote :

"My boyfriend just made me cry. "

dickhead

11/12/2009 1:03:04 PM

im here for the confessions...

11/12/2009 1:03:43 PM

Quote :

"I used to live in a really cheaply built apartment. I had this neighbor who was a female and some times could hear her masturbate and some times would hear her have sex. There were times when should would masturbate and then I would masturbate afterwords being loud intentionally. We never spoke and she never made a point to quiet down. This lasted for about half of my lease. I see her around town some times and we both smile at each other though neither has ever said a word about it. "

11/12/2009 1:04:33 PM

Quote :

"Sometimes I really ponder what it would be like to have a dick and what it would feel like. I especially wonder what it would be like to come - would it feel like the peeing sensation I get? Boggles my mind."

11/12/2009 1:06:02 PM