Quote :

"As long as some African kid lost his foot over it, she'll be happy."

1/2/2008 2:00:38 PM

We are not fans of the two diamond bands so we went with the ring pictured and a simple white gold band for the wedding band, the ring is awesome and the secondary diamonds would have taken away from the ring itself. I am pretty happy with it although its weird that she gets to wear something that costs as much as a used car on her finger

1/2/2008 2:04:21 PM

dont forget to take out insurance on her "new car"

1/2/2008 2:05:09 PM

1/2/2008 2:09:31 PM

got to love how DeBeers toppled entire governments just to get their way. the devil himself could not have invented better marketmakers. i think at the moment they're having to pay off Russian mobsters, who are sitting on an uncanny supply of Siberian diamonds. if that little racket fails, the market is going to be flooded. either that or until the Chinese decide they want in on the trade. the Chinese are efficient and always play the volume game instead of the pricing power game. until then, diamonds will hold their value.

1/2/2008 4:04:38 PM

Its not the value of the diamond, its what it represents and no matter how many there are they will always be desired by wimmnz.

1/2/2008 4:39:41 PM

If its not worth enough to make you feel a little pain when you buy it then it doesn't represent much.


but thats just my opinion.

1/2/2008 4:44:26 PM

well ill tell you one thing, im not spending 2 months salary (after taxes) on the ring. the ring means a lot to us regardless of the size, but a piece of jewelry is not worth anything close to 2 months pay and we both agree, regardless of the emotional value. I dont even think ill end up spending 1 months pay and thatll still be a few thousand, which I think is PLENTY(aka more than a ring is worth). obviously this varies from couple to couple and what is a reasonable amount is only determined in each separate case

Put it this way, lets just say I 'won' some $100,000 diamond ring that was just amazing that i used vs me buying a $100,000 ring. it would represent the same thing to the two of US (but not necessarily other couples and that is completely understandable) . now dont get me wrong, im going to be working hard to pick something that she is really really going to like and im spending some $, but the value of an engagement ring is not measured in $s

[Edited on January 2, 2008 at 5:12 PM. Reason : ]

1/2/2008 4:54:20 PM

don't get a big, expensive ring to start off with....

it'll be harder to top later down the road...:-D

1/2/2008 5:31:20 PM

im kinda lucky she doesnt wear a lot of jewelry. she doesnt have her ears pierced and she has one ring - a promise ring i gave her a couple years ago.

so i guess i can consider that as well, that i never buy her jewelry heh

1/2/2008 5:32:34 PM

we're in the process of re-designing mine.

his sister recently got engaged and she wants a family heirloom too, so i offered to redesign mine (which has the diamonds from both his and my grandmothers rings in it) so that her grandmothers diamond can be incorporated into both of ours.

i havent even begun to think about, and i hate to see it go because i love my ring - but i think its the right thing to do.

1/2/2008 5:46:57 PM

i love my ring that Schmitty picked out for me its the perfect size and its soo sparkly, people are always commenting on it. It looks similiar to the one that strudle66 had a picture of.

1/2/2008 7:09:29 PM

Quote :

"be sure not to limit yourself to a diamond. My wife made it clear she did not want a diamond and that her favorite stone was a saphaire. She wanted something simple, but elegant."

I HATE that people think engagement ring = diamond!

There are rarer stones out there, that cost less, and are more brilliant. Why? They aren't controlled by DeBeers! Don't fall into the trap. Get something else.

If my boyfriend showed up with a ring I'd start hitting him with the box. He knows this and doesn't mind.

A ring is not an investment either. You won't be able to sell it for what you paid, and you'll probably never be able to sell it anyway even if she bitches for a bigger one later because the first one has "sentimental" value.

My suggestion:
Engagement: ring pop
Wedding: CZ
10th anniv.: diamond

Then you can afford a decent one, and are less likely to have your $5k "investment" taken by a cheating ho.

1/3/2008 4:07:39 PM

i made this thread a year and half ago

http://www.thewolfweb.com/message_topic.aspx?topic=419035

1/3/2008 4:11:47 PM

1/3/2008 4:34:55 PM

too bad your thread title wasn't better - since it sucked it's gone

1/3/2008 5:17:08 PM

Haha

And FYI, I'd say put the money in an account to save for either retirement or a house.

1/3/2008 5:36:17 PM

Quote :

"My suggestion: Engagement: ring pop Wedding: CZ 10th anniv.: diamond Then you can afford a decent one, and are less likely to have your $5k "investment" taken by a cheating ho."

or you could already be somewhat successful and not 18 when you buy the ring....

1/3/2008 5:40:13 PM

dont be cheap

1/3/2008 5:42:36 PM

Let's assume you have $10k in the bank for a nice ring.

Option A: buy ring
In 10 years you have a ring you paid $10k for, and it's probably worth about $5k.

Option B: put the money in a mutual fund with we'll assume a 10% return
10 years later you have $27,179.10 You can then buy the $10k ring from the schmuck whose wife cheated on him for $5k and have over $20k in the bank more than buying the ring at engagement. Let that $20k sit in the fund for another 20 years and you have $147,740.65 more than the guy that bought the ring earlier.

It's not about being cheap, it's about being fiscally responsible and wanting to retire early. I could get the boyfriend to buy me an expensive rock, but I'd rather have the money working for us instead of on my finger so we could both retire a year or two early.

1/3/2008 5:55:26 PM

^

That can't be a serious arguement. I havnt seen someone formulate such an elaborate troll post on thewolfweb to date.

1/3/2008 7:04:52 PM

Instead of buying my first house, I should have invested the money for 10 years, and then bought a bigger house and in the mean time I should live in a shack.

1/3/2008 7:29:34 PM

Do you think that a 10% return is unrealistic? Maybe over a bad year, but when we are talking about averages over a decade I think it's not an unreasonable expectation.

1/3/2008 10:41:30 PM

Quote :

"Instead of buying my first house, I should have invested the money for 10 years, and then bought a bigger house and in the mean time I should live in a shack."

A house gains value. A diamond loses it.

Get a house that's no bigger than you plan to need but not too small because changing them every few years is silly (realtor fees can REALLY cut into your equity), but your comparison is useless.

1/3/2008 10:43:50 PM

My ex only wanted a Tiffany's ring...bump that.

1/3/2008 10:45:48 PM

I would say that I want something green that says kawasaki, but I already have 2 (sans the green) so the early retirement is a far superior option.

1/3/2008 10:51:10 PM

So my time is coming soon and I know I'll need to get a ring.

I am adamant on having no help whatsoever in picking out the ring. I don't want to know what my girl likes, or what diamond shape might look best on her finger. I want to go in, take what I know about her likes, dislikes, and tastes, and use my head, heart, and wallet to pick what I feel is the perfect ring.

Is this a good or bad idea? My girl insists on going to a jewelry shop and trying out rings, but I don't want to know what she likes or dislikes because it'll instantly come into play when I'm trying to shop in the future. I'm betting she's nervous about my ability to pick a nice ring and wants to have some input, since she refuses to go with anyone else to "just try them on".

I don't know if I should just bust her for not trusting in me, or just give in and let her have her input.

1/4/2008 5:57:56 PM

She's the one that's going to have to wear it. Let her pick it out.

1/4/2008 6:00:25 PM

um if your girl wants input and you dont let her have it.. BIG mistake imo for an engagement ring.

1/4/2008 6:13:54 PM

i went to a few stores with my fiancee and she was able to show me exactly what she liked... then when i went and bought it a few months later, i knew what to look for and it made it a lot easier..
i'd suggest going and looking at them with her.

1/4/2008 8:21:35 PM

^^^^ You can probably just ask her best friend and she will know what she likes and exactly what she wants. I think it would have been nice for it to be a surprise what it looked like, but eh.

1/4/2008 11:41:00 PM

Quote :

"She's the one that's going to have to wear it. Let her pick it out."

QFGDT. she would have to be very easy going (i.e. comatose) to love whatever ring you choose.

1/5/2008 2:18:17 AM

my ex fiance and I knew exactly what she wanted


it was pretty nice


thank god I knew the owner of the pawn shop personally

1/5/2008 4:48:58 AM

392 is hardcore

[Edited on January 5, 2008 at 9:27 AM. Reason : .]

1/5/2008 9:09:02 AM

buying jewelry is wrong stupid

it serves no legitimate purpose other than materialistic bragging

it says "hey look, I don't care about the poor, or charities, or my kids, I just want bling!"


engagement rings are even worse

talk about patriarchy

and don't give me any, "I'm not a patriarch, this is just tradition", or "it's more for her parents" bullshit


if you buy your gf a ring for wedding or engagement, it says, "you can't have love without money", and "I own you"

I will never understand you fucking losers

go ahead and spend your money on a fucking adornment


I mean shit,

don't spend it on

charity
school or church
solar panels or graywater system
hybrid car
business
education
retirement
healthier food
organic products
compact fluorescent bulbs
home improvement
vacation

NO, ON A FUCKING ADORNMENT!!!!1

ON A FUCKING ADORNMENT!!!!1

I will never understand you fucking losers



ps

hey ladies

you know all those things you'd like to change about men in general?

ya think being a materialistic whore or being the symbolic property of a man has nothing to do with it?

ya think?

YA THINK?

what, are you afraid that if you reject patriarchal traditions, you'll end up like ambrosia####?

1/5/2008 9:14:17 AM

^wow

1/5/2008 9:28:46 AM

Or it shows I am serious about being your husband and I am financially ready to enter marriage, or I am committed to you. You must have never been in a relationship?

1/5/2008 10:01:00 AM

^^
just speaking the truth

you see,

when most people do something that they regard as normal

it's hard for them to see it as what it really is

most posters in this thread just assume that engagement rings are simply an innocent and harmless tradition

that they're romantic and appropriate and normal

well, normal just means >50%, even though people assume that normalcy implies some universal intrinsic truth

and there's nothing romantic about patriarchy or materialism


so, the fact remains:

engagement rings are bullshit



how about planting an engagement tree?

no, no, won't do

girls need to clearly display on their person at all times whether or not they're owned or still on the market

and in the case of being owned, they must display how much they cost

it's sick

it's fucking sick

Quote :

"Or it shows I am serious about being your husband"

so she's not serious about being your wife? I mean, why doesn't she buy a ring for you?

Quote :

"and I am financially ready to enter marriage,"

if you're financially ready for marriage (poor people can marry, you know,) why spend money on symbols?

why not just print out a bank statement to show your assets?

Quote :

"or I am committed to you."

how does showing a willingness to essentially waste money demonstrate one's level of commitment to a relationship?

Quote :

"You must have never been in a relationship?"

I've been a couple ltrs, (and a few shorter ones)

most women I've been with, especially the ones that I discuss marriage with, agree 100% with me on this

I have no interest in spending my life with some materialistic whore with 12 purses and 4 jewelry boxes

my [future] wife and I will be smarter than to waste money on hunks of metal and rock

unless they're building materials being used to improve our lives

1/5/2008 10:28:10 AM

Quote :

"Or it shows I am serious about being your husband and I am financially ready to enter marriage, or I am committed to you."

wow...you have a fucking shitty ass view of marriages or dudes or something....the serious about being your husband...by getting a fucking ring? you materialistic dumbass...."financially ready"...let me be a woman translator here, "so you can fucking spend all your money on me, MEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEME"...and i think 392 summed it up well on your committed comment

1/5/2008 10:33:08 AM

Quote :

"She's the one that's going to have to wear it. Let her pick it out."

that's not very romantic, now is it?

if you are ready to marry someone, picking out a ring shouldn't be that big of an issue. She told me some general qualities she liked, but other than that, i picked out the setting and the stone.
She loves it.

1/5/2008 11:33:08 AM

Quote :

"I don't know if I should just bust her for not trusting in me, or just give in and let her have her input"

Its not a trust issue, you want her to pick out your clothes for the rest of your life? Go in, try on everything in the store, find what she likes. Its not only looks its also comfort of said ring too you dumbass.

1/5/2008 12:02:37 PM

Quote :

"Instead of buying my first house, I should have invested the money for 10 years, and then bought a bigger house and in the mean time I should live in a shack."

just saw this....2 things...first of all you cant live in a diamond ring, and also houses go up in values

1/5/2008 12:07:35 PM

Actually, I've been dating the same guy for 7 years, so I have a pretty good view of guys and relationships. We are getting married on March 1 and I DID NOT get a very expensive ring. I got one that was on clearance. It made my fiancee proud that he could finally afford to get me a ring and tell everyone that we were officially engaged. I am not materialistic at all. If it is just an adornment to you, then don't get one, but for many people it is not. I hope you aren't one that buys any clothes from anywhere other than Goodwill, because that would just be an adornment. You would be just wasting your money, you should have given it to charity. I don't feel "owned" and my fiancee doesn't feel that he "owns" me. Like I said, you must have never been in a GOOD relationship. Clearly all of yours have ended because you seem like a big jackass. Even if you think women agree with you 100%, I would bet money they are just saying that, and you would find out later they feel differently. And I agree, women are just as capable of buying engagement rings for the guys too and I have seen people do it. So get of your high horse and get a life. And I am starting Optometry school in the fall and my fiancee will make far less than I will. So there goes your idea that I expect him to spend all is money on MEMEMEME. If you don't care about engagement rings, then don't post in this thread. Simple as that. I was enjoying seeing others, but clearly you low-lives have nothing better to do.

1/5/2008 12:08:13 PM

I was proud to buy my wife a nice ring, it is a symbol of my love for her, not necessarily a financial showing but just a damn fine ring.

1/5/2008 12:10:25 PM

Quote :

"so she's not serious about being your wife? I mean, why doesn't she buy a ring for you?"

I've asked myself that question, too. I'd totally buy my fiance an engagement ring: it's only fair.

And I can totally understand why you find the entire ring thing repulsive, though it's still one of the only nonverbal indicators of "I'm taken."

Wanting a ring (note: I did not say one that would break the bank) doesn't mean we're automatically "materialistic whores with 12 purses and 4 jewelry boxes," either. Chill the fuck out.

1/5/2008 12:11:49 PM

Quote :

"it says "hey look, I don't care about the poor, or charities, or my kids, I just want bling!""

No, it does not.

Quote :

"if you buy your gf a ring for wedding or engagement, it says, "you can't have love without money", and "I own you""

1) No, it doesn't.
2) Depending on your definition of 'own', maybe. And some people don't have a problem with that. Never mind that she had to willingly give herself to him in order to be 'owned'

Quote :

"what, are you afraid that if you reject patriarchal traditions, you'll end up like ambrosia####?"

What, happy? Thanks, boo

Quote :

"Or it shows I am serious about being your husband and I am financially ready to enter marriage, or I am committed to you. "

You don't need a ring to show this. Shit, until I bought myself a digital SLR, I always told my bf he'd better propose with a camera if he bought me something. I still haven't seriously answered his 'So I guess you don't need a camera when I propose, do you?' IIRC, I told him that since my mom wouldn't mind a new camera at any given point in time, he could always give me an upgrade

Quote :

"Wanting a ring (note: I did not say one that would break the bank) doesn't mean we're automatically "materialistic whores with 12 purses and 4 jewelry boxes," either. Chill the fuck out."

Indeed. But since 392 has deemed having accessories and doing something worthwhile with one's money mutually exclusive, if we have anything nice, it automatically means we're selfish and simple-minded, which might as well be materialistic whores

Would you like a male's perspective on buying an engagement ring, from one who wants to buy me (what I consider) an expensive ring? I could tell my man to post in here

1/5/2008 12:28:21 PM

I only say "Financially ready" because I strongly believe you should be. Marriage is hard enough and money problems is the #1 cause of divorce. Why didn't my fiancee and I just get married out of high school? Because we wanted to get an education first so we could support ourselves when we got married.

1/5/2008 12:30:12 PM

So what's a ring got to do with that?

Having a ring doesn't fund your 401K or emergency fund or pay the mortgage.

Being financially stable != buying your woman a ring
You are able, but you don't need to buy a ring just because you can. That's the point I was making, since your post was in the context of 'why buy a ring?' , with your answer being "because it shows we're financially stable"

1/5/2008 12:36:24 PM

A $20 sterling ring says "I'm taken" as well as huge diamond.

And honestly, if you could keep guys from annoying you without the ring before, I do not see why it's suddenly needed.

Why don't guys have to wear some symbol of engagement to keep the chicks off of them?

And why is letting the woman pick it out not romantic if you still want one? Would you rather pick out an uncomfortable one that she'll only wear once in a while, or have her pick out one she can wear all the time?

It annoys me as much as 392 that people participate in traditions without thinking about what they are doing and why it's a good/bad idea. Only difference is that I posted #s justifying why a ring is such a bad idea.

1/5/2008 12:37:52 PM

i mean i aint talkin 20 dolla but dont need nothing over 1k imo

1/5/2008 12:41:30 PM