McDonald's gave me a hot coffee this morning instead of the iced one I ordered.

2/8/2013 11:05:58 AM

I thinks sheetz might be jewing me on my extra shot of espresso.

2/8/2013 11:10:23 AM

when you have to shower, but you also have to shit. and no one likes to shit right after a shower so you wait it out and end up being late to where you need to be.

2/8/2013 6:29:51 PM

My husband is upstairs so I have to get up if I want anything.

2/9/2013 3:24:03 PM

My wife is out of town so I have to get up if I want anything.

2/9/2013 3:40:02 PM

I'm completely alone so I have to get up if I want anything.

2/9/2013 5:14:48 PM

My brother and his wife live with me, I have to scream at them to get me anything

2/9/2013 5:22:05 PM

I want to turn the lights out but I don't want to climb out from under my pile of snuggly blankets.

2/9/2013 9:02:25 PM

The gravy I made tonight was lumpy

2/9/2013 9:03:43 PM

I can't decide what kind of take-out to order

and it's just getting later and later

2/9/2013 9:04:33 PM

Bitch that was supposed to buy my yogurt maker didn't show up. Tried to call her and she didn't answer her phone. Fuck this, I'm just going to give it away if no one shows up soon.

2/9/2013 9:11:01 PM

I can't find anyone to deliver sushi, so if I want any I will have to put on pants and a bra.

2/10/2013 11:40:52 AM

Had a couple suits made for me before Christmas.

When he was measuring my waist, I told the tailor that I'm about 5-7 pounds heavier than I where I would like to be. I think he was like, "yeah...I hear that all the time."

Now I'm pretty much at my ideal weight...and now the waist in my previouslyperfectlytailored pants are too big!!

2/14/2013 8:54:59 AM

I have to sit through page 50 reading about how lazy elise is.

2/14/2013 4:05:41 PM

Elise had surgery. Not that she isn't lazy, she is lazier.

[Edited on February 14, 2013 at 4:20 PM. Reason : and whiny, don't forget whiny. ]

2/14/2013 4:19:42 PM

Work has a bottomless supply of free soda and it's hard not to drink any

2/14/2013 4:33:51 PM

I just heard that stupid "fishy, fish-AYYYYY" commercial for the 3rd time in an hour on Pandora

2/20/2013 3:43:14 PM

ME TOO!!!

2/20/2013 4:37:05 PM

Me threeve!

Also, I decided I wanted Thai food for dinner tonight. At about 8:45. The restaurant that I wanted to order from closed at 9.

2/21/2013 12:39:36 AM

I have to pee

kinda bad

but don't feel like moving

:3

2/21/2013 12:40:39 AM

my bubble mint gum makes my water too cold to drink

2/21/2013 4:03:16 PM

I am going to have to ride the brand new bike I bought that was made for me in the USA and shipped here to Germany for 5 hours....in 35 degree weather...

2/21/2013 4:07:51 PM

Forgot to bring an extra pair of underwear for the gym. Went commando for my 5k run during my lunch break.

<----


[Edited on February 21, 2013 at 4:10 PM. Reason : 5150]

2/21/2013 4:08:30 PM

The State/UNC game is on during 1 of 4 days I have to snowboard out west...$100 per day to ride.

Why can't it just be a night game?? arghh.


Yeah, Im taking a long lunch on Saturday, EFF it...not missing that game.

[Edited on February 21, 2013 at 8:58 PM. Reason : .]

2/21/2013 8:58:04 PM

I'm considering switching to AT&T U-verse, but they don't have BBC America in HD

2/21/2013 9:31:45 PM

not knowing until 10pm that we have a 3 hour delay tomorrow morning

2/21/2013 10:05:13 PM

Being too lazy to walk across the street to the bar last night

2/22/2013 7:22:23 AM

i don't have to do anything at work today, but it is my last day and i have to start my new job right away on monday. i could use a few days of throwing my feet up on the coffee table.

2/22/2013 9:17:34 AM

next time i switch jobs i'll definitely do a vacation in between

2/22/2013 9:19:44 AM

The anti-bacterial soap at work dries my hands out.

2/22/2013 9:28:12 AM

^ i keep hand lotion on my desk at work because of this... i feel like such a bitch

2/22/2013 9:29:35 AM

I don't want to drive to town to pick up my grocery order.

2/22/2013 2:46:12 PM

I got olive oil on my tie

2/22/2013 3:09:30 PM

I make vegetable broth from vegetable scraps I save in the freezer much faster than I use vegetable broth.

2/24/2013 1:18:44 PM

I planned this week's menu and I have everything I need except for an onion

2/24/2013 1:35:42 PM

god damn coffee shop didn't open until 9 am this morning

2/24/2013 1:58:38 PM

want food really bad but know I shouldn't eat anything else :3

2/25/2013 4:07:16 AM

I had a meeting, and one of the people couldn't attend because he was locked in his house. Apparently, he was having problems with the external gate in his driveway, so he couldn't get the car out.

2/25/2013 5:14:49 AM

that's my next excuse... my outer gate won't open so I'm locked in.

2/25/2013 5:49:34 AM

my feet are cold, but I don't feel like going upstairs to get socks

2/25/2013 11:08:43 AM

You have to keep multiple sock stashes around the house.

2/25/2013 11:35:52 AM

Can you fetch me some?

2/25/2013 11:38:41 AM

Since you asked, no.

2/25/2013 11:47:18 AM

Lame.

2/25/2013 11:47:56 AM

When your niece pulls the string halfway out of your hoodie.

2/25/2013 7:30:23 PM

I haven't had a carb all day

2/25/2013 7:35:02 PM

Drove by a McDonald's and saw the shamrock shake sign. Their shake machine is down. Not my day...

2/25/2013 8:03:47 PM

I thought drinking milk did the body good. Now I learn my entire life has been a lie.

2/25/2013 8:14:19 PM

I heard something on ESPN radio today that chocolate milk is better for you than regular milk.

2/25/2013 8:32:28 PM

where is this anti milk material coming from

2/26/2013 1:02:49 AM