67

12/17/2009 8:59:05 AM

Quote :

"My boss is having major problems getting pregnant.... I told her I would be a surrogate mother for her if she hasn't been able to have a child by the time I get out of school. As I think about it more and more I realize it's such a scary thing to do, but at the same time I don't even think my fear could compare to her's and her husband's happiness. I'm going to stick by my word and really do that if she needs me to. my word and really do that if she needs me to."

12/17/2009 9:09:00 AM

^ That's badass.

12/17/2009 1:12:13 PM

^^Someone wants a promotion.

12/17/2009 3:37:20 PM

Does she speak eloquently
And would she have your baby?
I'm sure she'd make a really excellent mother

12/17/2009 3:41:12 PM

confessions please!

12/17/2009 7:45:37 PM

Quote :

"tww is really starting to annoy me right now with everyone's online persona. but i'm too addicted to it to just sign out and never come back so I'll just put up with everyone."

Quote :

"I had purchased one of those "fleshlight" masturbatory aids for a long trip overseas. The other day I had to get my stuff inspected by customs and I had forgotten all about it because it was packed away. Well needless to say that once the guy searching my stuff pulled it out and I told him what it was he was very grateful to be wearing gloves. /awkard embarassing moment"

12/17/2009 8:10:37 PM

^ something similar to that was on texts from last night.

i'm open for confessions.

12/17/2009 8:12:32 PM

Quote :

"the other day i searched on facebook for my first girlfriend, whom i haven't talked to in 9 years."

12/17/2009 8:42:41 PM

Quote :

"I got to spend a day in Las Vegas before leaving the states so me and my friends from work rented a van to get around the city. I started off just drinking cocktails (i wasn't supposed to drink at all) and then I said fuck it and started drinking heavily. So we all end up walking down the street heading towards the Sapphire strip club, but along the way they ran into a Michael Jackson impersonator/drug dealer. Needless to say they just had to buy some weed off the guy. So we all end up going back to my room and I smoked weed for the first time that night. In my fucked up state of mind I decided it would be nice to call a hooker over. So I ended up kicking everyone out of my room and calling this hooker and I pay $Texas to have sex with her; it was awesome from what I remember. "

12/17/2009 8:54:37 PM

I still want to know who thinks I'm the funniest chick they've ever met.

12/17/2009 8:55:41 PM

you are pretty hilarious

12/17/2009 8:56:49 PM

Quote :

"i'm not allowed to be friends with my first boyfriend because his wife is insane and they met through me when we were dating. "

oh i know shawna. i want to know who was the guy who stammered like a retard the first time he met me and thought my accent was cute.

12/17/2009 8:57:09 PM

Quote :

"when i'm walking in a crosswalk and see an oncoming car that is about to turn in front of me, i walk ahead faster to block their turn and then walk really slow to make them miss the light i'm probably amused by this much more than i should be"

12/17/2009 9:24:42 PM

Quote :

"you know how some people have a cigarette after sex? i like to have a bowl of ice cream"

12/17/2009 9:51:33 PM

Quote :

"If you're familiar with the term "blood wings," I am a double recipient of said award. And I am very much so proud of that. "

i had to google this term and i'm still confused

12/17/2009 9:53:08 PM

eating a girl on out her period.

so sick.

12/17/2009 9:56:18 PM

going down on a girl on the rag

it's also the meaning behind "get your wings" which was the title of an aerosmith album and a phrase commonly used around biker gangs as a form of initiation...the prospective member goes down on his old lady while on the rag to get his patch for his jacket

[Edited on December 17, 2009 at 9:57 PM. Reason : .]

12/17/2009 9:56:46 PM

urban dictionary had 2 definitions. and i think i'm more disturbed about the whole slamming a pin into your chest part than eating a girl out on her period.

12/17/2009 10:00:56 PM

Quote :

"I like a song by Wheatus......and you're a dick."

Awww somebody hates me

12/17/2009 10:19:16 PM

give me some damn confessions....I'm bored...and a little drunk

12/17/2009 10:35:02 PM

Quote :

"i fake an orgasm tonight as a guy i'm pretty good at that just was not into it tonight "

12/17/2009 10:47:01 PM

how does a dude fake an orgasm? i mean... either it comes out or doesn't. right?

12/17/2009 10:49:10 PM

what comes out or doesn't

12/17/2009 10:49:52 PM

on a rare occasion, there is no come.

12/17/2009 10:50:42 PM

i thought the whole defining point of an orgasm was the ejaculation

12/17/2009 10:52:12 PM

from m-w:

Quote :

"an explosive discharge of neuromuscular tensions at the height of sexual arousal that is usually accompanied by the ejaculation of semen in the male and by vaginal contractions in the female"

12/17/2009 10:53:11 PM

Quote :

"I was a little freaked out when I realized that I am an adult now and that the family I grew up with is no longer my primary family."

12/17/2009 11:06:55 PM

^^^neg

12/17/2009 11:08:08 PM

Quote :

"i've now seen djeternal's penis. i'm that much more wanting to have sex with him "

and

Quote :

"I have also seen dje's penis...it's pretty big"

[Edited on December 17, 2009 at 11:29 PM. Reason : why all the confessions about his penis to me? ]

12/17/2009 11:27:25 PM

Quote :

"I haven't seen djeternal's penis, but I wouldn't mind it."

12/17/2009 11:30:45 PM

damn someone make a confession to me...the last PM I got was like 9ish...I'm feeling dry

12/17/2009 11:31:44 PM

Quote :

"I was some what drunk at the Hive one night and the waitress came up to our table because she recognized me. After talking for a few minutes, I asked her 'what was your name again?' and then I realized she was my ex from high school. Does that make me an ass hole? "

12/17/2009 11:35:57 PM

Quote :

"i usually don't give a damn what folks think of me, but i kinda wish my name were mentioned in the hottest males thread "

12/17/2009 11:36:29 PM

Quote :

"when a girl says she's "dry", my immediate thought is "I'll make you wet" I think that makes me a perv "

12/17/2009 11:37:05 PM

Quote :

"When I was 13, I cut a hole from my bedroom into the bathroom next to my room. I watched my older sister's friends take showers during/after a sleepover. I still spank to those mental images."

epic 4 post streak!

12/17/2009 11:37:38 PM

^^what other things could she mean by 'dry'? haha

[Edited on December 17, 2009 at 11:38 PM. Reason : ^]

12/17/2009 11:37:55 PM

drunk

12/17/2009 11:39:12 PM

Quote :

"I too have see djeternal's penis and it is big. DO WANT "

12/17/2009 11:39:43 PM

you know when your mouth gettin' dry
you plenty high

12/17/2009 11:40:12 PM

Where are my confessions? I need some entertainment while I work.

12/17/2009 11:41:35 PM

Quote :

"I had sex with my neighbor twice. She has huge tits and fucks like a goddamn nympho. My fiance has no idea that this happened while we were dating."

12/17/2009 11:42:57 PM

Quote :

"i was taking care of my neighboors house, when i was a teenager and found the wife's stash of naughty underwear. there was also a vibrator in the same drawer. for some reason, i stole the batteries from the vibe. they never said a word. "

12/17/2009 11:46:04 PM

Quote :

"I'm delusional"

12/17/2009 11:47:06 PM

Quote :

"for some reason i find miska to be very attractive "

12/17/2009 11:48:47 PM

^cause she's hot

12/17/2009 11:55:02 PM

miska

12/17/2009 11:55:15 PM

miska_kisses

12/17/2009 11:56:43 PM

Quote :

"for some reason i find miska to be very attractive "

12/17/2009 11:59:01 PM

Quote :

"i think the beatles were horribly overrated "

12/18/2009 12:01:58 AM