I'm completely infatuated with this superbly hot chick (like, Natalie Portman/Anne Hathaway hot) at the blockbuster by us.

I think we'll be renting more movies on Saturday nights

Jesus Christ, she's hot. Dear god almighty.

Next time I'm using dirty talk to get laid, she's being involved in a make-believe scenario.

5/31/2008 10:34:30 PM

[Edited on May 31, 2008 at 10:48 PM. Reason : nm]

5/31/2008 10:36:22 PM

^NO!

Don't puss out.

5/31/2008 10:49:32 PM

6/1/2008 2:24:27 AM

english holmes...we are not all computer wizzes

6/1/2008 2:40:50 AM

i ate sonic 3 times this week

i'm not even ashamed

however i get pissed when the carhop forgets my mint. i love that shit after i finish my coke.

6/1/2008 3:12:49 AM

not all things are flat in kansas

6/1/2008 3:25:56 AM

as cheesy as it sounds....i'm a firm believer that there are lots of forces at work both inside and outside of us all...

this is why i believe in God, and astrology, and dreams, etc....

that being said...last night I had a very random, and what I thought was pretty insignificant dream....of the parts I can remember....

I've been studying it a little this morning to see if there was anything to it...and wow...just wow....it pretty much sums up all the shit i have racing around in my mind right now according the information i have found...

and that's not me reading anything extra into it....that's direct interpretation from what each part of my dream symbolizes...

6/1/2008 9:01:49 AM

I've had snakes in every dream I've had recently... wonder what those symbolize?

I spent way too much money at American Eagle last night, mostly because I lost weight and can fit into a smaller size and it makes me feel good to buy smaller clothes.

I'm spending way too much time dwelling on the past right now. Could be the Sister Hazel on my winamp.

Sometimes I wish I could get a sneak preview of what my future holds so I can relax already. Sometimes I just want to go back to 3 years ago.

6/1/2008 9:05:17 AM

every time my girlfriend travels and is away from me I get real down and can't help but feel that she is going to leave me. she's been in europe for close to three weeks now, and although I hear from her nearly every day (sometimes more than once), I always feel like she is not going to come back

6/1/2008 9:08:36 AM

the more stuff i find about this dream the freakier it gets....

apparently everything in a dream symbolizes something....and this is just crazy

[Edited on June 1, 2008 at 9:59 AM. Reason : ok...it just got really weird]

6/1/2008 9:48:16 AM

i don't know what i'm working for in life and i don't even know what i want really

6/1/2008 10:11:12 AM

I need a second job.

6/1/2008 3:17:31 PM

i need a second testicle

6/1/2008 3:18:26 PM

One e-mail caused this past ten months of misery.

6/1/2008 3:21:51 PM

I need a third job.

6/1/2008 3:26:02 PM

i need a hobby

6/1/2008 3:26:48 PM

i need to shave like now, i got a memorial day beard gone wrong

6/1/2008 3:28:03 PM

atleast you can grow facial hair

6/1/2008 3:29:17 PM

yeah i went home for memorial day and hadnt shaved in like 3 days and i say something and my friend was like "yeah if you didnt shave for a few days you could totally pull it off" and i was thinking like "damn i havent shaved in a few days anyways lol"

6/1/2008 3:32:21 PM

its a curse, especially since mine suddenly started growing in like the dudes on the FBI posters

youve seen it i look like a bushman that got attacked by a bird or some shit. id rather be able to say i cant grow it than OH SHIT THIS IS GONNA HURT BAD

6/1/2008 3:35:14 PM

yeah it was pretty long.. i used to have a pic of me after two weeks of not shaving on here but i think it was lost in the server crash..

6/1/2008 3:38:34 PM

Only having to shave on mondays is ftw

6/1/2008 3:45:25 PM

just because you ONLY shave on mondays doesn't mean you SHOULD ONLY shave on mondays

6/1/2008 3:47:19 PM

too bad i cant find my little memory card for the coolpix or id hook you guys up with a pic of my bird nest. usually i can pull it off monday and wednesday. everyone is usually wearing stupid shit on fridays anyway so i dont care, unless im going to meet someone.

but i always shave the night before cause my skin is so sensitive

6/1/2008 3:51:21 PM

I'm a pity whore, the absolute worst subset of the attention whore.

6/1/2008 3:53:37 PM

i'm just the opposite of a pity whore....or something


i can't stand for people to feel sorry for me....

6/1/2008 3:55:17 PM

I like to read the confessions thread on sunday to see if anythig interesting happened over the weekend

Also, i read postsecret every sunday

6/1/2008 4:45:10 PM

This is more of a brag than a confession but since theres not a boasting thread...

I banged two girls this weekend with a cumulative age of 50

Neither one was in their 20's

6/1/2008 4:48:26 PM

18 and 32

or 19 and 31

6/1/2008 4:49:04 PM

34 and 16

[Edited on June 1, 2008 at 4:50 PM. Reason : nah, 19 and 31]

6/1/2008 4:49:52 PM

ok...i dont' know that i would have shared that

[Edited on June 1, 2008 at 4:50 PM. Reason : hahha...ok]

6/1/2008 4:50:27 PM

[Edited on June 1, 2008 at 4:51 PM. Reason : kfjh]

6/1/2008 4:51:34 PM

+2 to that guy

6/1/2008 4:51:52 PM

i gotta walk to motherfucking foodlion after it finishes storming

6/1/2008 7:58:49 PM

i wanna write something here but i know somebody at work post stalks me sometimes so that'd be bad

6/1/2008 9:51:26 PM

hoe sit down has got to be one of the best rap songs ever

6/1/2008 9:55:55 PM

i wonder how long it takes life to become the shit once u graduate

6/2/2008 2:58:40 AM

I wonder how long it takes for life to become the shit if you don't graduate

6/2/2008 3:00:11 AM

good point

6/2/2008 3:02:11 AM

My left leg is ~0.75" shorter than my right.

6/2/2008 11:08:05 AM

my ex called me 18 times sunday morning between 330-4am and i only picked up once to find her sobbing asking me to come pick her up.

all of this while i was entertaining the new girl im seeing. you should hear the voice mails she left on my cell phone.

i really want to upload those voice mails to mp3s but i dont know how to get them off my phone.

6/2/2008 5:08:20 PM

did you pick her up? i'm guessing no but....did she really need help?

6/2/2008 7:50:48 PM

what was wrong with her? And.... what did your new lady say?

6/2/2008 8:00:21 PM

i carried my laundry about a mile just to wash it for free at str8bacardils place

6/2/2008 8:04:50 PM

josh i really think this whole no-car thing is working out for you. you're going green!

6/2/2008 9:44:21 PM

i think i'd shoot myself if i didnt have a car

and i seriously look like i'm post stalking you ^ but i really just go to post somewhere and its always you im responding to

6/2/2008 9:49:46 PM

that's kinda cute.

6/2/2008 9:56:22 PM

i think that means you want me

6/2/2008 9:56:49 PM

well let's not jump to conclusions...

6/2/2008 10:01:07 PM