*Has constantly started leaking a honey-like substance uncontrollably from her disgusting, fat nipples
*Has pus-filled pimples all over her boobs and back
*Has inch-long black hairs growing in her asscrack
*Farts uncontrollably and her rat terrier-like muff reeks of homelessness

Still gets me hard. That is all.

5/3/2007 6:13:14 PM

guess what!!

Its not gonna get better after she poops that slimy thing out

[Edited on May 3, 2007 at 6:14 PM. Reason : ]

5/3/2007 6:14:31 PM

you people

5/3/2007 6:14:42 PM

excuse me while i puke

^^, hahahahah

[Edited on May 3, 2007 at 6:15 PM. Reason : hahaha]

5/3/2007 6:14:54 PM

now that's love

what a lucky gal

5/3/2007 6:16:14 PM

hahahaha

gg man. treat her right. let her know that she's loved

5/3/2007 6:20:06 PM

Oh, I forgot three things....
*Has stretchmarks that look like ``~~``~ pretty much everywhere not affected by gravity.
*Has thighs that have quarter-sized dimples in them.
*Made me clean up the two panty-liners my dog ate that were soaked in "discharge".

God bless her

5/3/2007 6:23:21 PM

Jesus, if thats love, I never want it.

GG for being a man though.

5/3/2007 6:24:22 PM

and i just threw up in my mouth a little bit

you should probably trade her in for a newer model

5/3/2007 6:24:36 PM

My guess is she was all these things prior to pregnancy.

5/3/2007 6:29:33 PM

Having delivered a few babies, and assisted on some C-sections, I still don't understand why the fathers want to be in the room. It's not a pretty process.

5/3/2007 6:30:04 PM

Quote :

"Still gets me hard. That is all."

5/3/2007 6:31:40 PM

^^^hardly, and that's the saddest part. hopefully she'll make a full recovery.

5/3/2007 6:43:16 PM

hopefully she'll read this thread and kick you in the balls

5/3/2007 6:45:22 PM

hey be sure to link her this page on your anniversary

5/3/2007 6:48:03 PM

this thread is like one of those NSFW threads with something homo like a penis in the first post but i keep clicking it because it says NSFW.

I can not stop clicking this thread, but everytime I do I get sick to my stomach.

5/3/2007 6:52:21 PM

she won't read this. she's talking about her hormones with her knocked up e-friends on some pregnancy forum. she woke me up last night because she was craving sweetened condensed milk. guess which tool put on his slippers and went to the store? (it was me)

5/3/2007 6:52:29 PM

While you were gone she blew me.

5/3/2007 6:53:12 PM

5/3/2007 6:58:05 PM

ok i'm heading home. guys,think of me when you're blowing your load in your girl tonight, and remember that there's always that .008 chance..... and how happy you are with your life.

(not that mine's bad or anything, it's just a different kind of good)

5/3/2007 7:00:08 PM

If you slap her tummy, do you hear an echo?

5/3/2007 7:06:11 PM

Quote :

"I still don't understand why the fathers want to be in the room"

My husband said he didn't want to see, etc. then when it was actually time to push he was fascinated watching


I can help you with remedies for most of those symptoms, so if you wanna know PM me. Here's a freebie: offer to shave for her since she can't reach it

5/3/2007 10:53:43 PM

or hire a pervert to shave her

5/3/2007 11:00:08 PM

....I do not know if I'm the first to say this or not....but...



I think that is precious!

5/3/2007 11:00:44 PM

i don't know if i'm the first to say this or not, but...

fucking +1000 for having a boxer!

5/3/2007 11:05:36 PM

congratulations - you just helped control the world's population

my ovaries are now permanently closed

5/3/2007 11:09:56 PM

Quote :

"Has constantly started leaking a honey-like substance uncontrollably from her disgusting, fat nipples"

honey-like as in consistency / thickness / color? or as in taste?

5/3/2007 11:11:39 PM

this thread made me physically ill

5/3/2007 11:13:07 PM

I'm sure your wife loves having her personal business all over the internet

5/3/2007 11:14:36 PM

tdub isn't quite "all over the internet"

unless wral gets ahold of it, then it will be on every scout.com board.

5/3/2007 11:17:52 PM

Quote :

"now that's love "

5/3/2007 11:17:59 PM

having kids is overrated and we do have this population problem. don't breed ppl.

5/3/2007 11:20:18 PM

^^^ o rly?

why don't you try googling a TWW screenname + TWW

see what happens

[Edited on May 3, 2007 at 11:21 PM. Reason :  ]

5/3/2007 11:20:46 PM

Quote :

"tdub isn't quite "all over the internet""

WELL IT JUST GOT REPOSTED ON CAMPUSBLENDER.COM!!!!!!

5/3/2007 11:20:49 PM

^^ if i look for tdub, i find tdub. no surprises there.

5/3/2007 11:22:47 PM

ok buddy

this totally doesn't count as being all over the internet

http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=simonn+tww&btnG=Search

5/3/2007 11:24:28 PM

there's always that 0.008 chance

yep

that's the same percentage of chance that I won't strongly recommend an abortion

5/4/2007 12:37:04 AM

i'm not trying to e-fight, but searching specifically for my username and 'tww' and yielding four results is not, in my opinion, 'all over the internet'

you can't even search for my real name and find that. only 'simonn'

5/4/2007 12:48:07 AM

5/4/2007 12:53:24 AM

Paul Cousins!

5/4/2007 1:06:29 AM

bless her heart

5/4/2007 1:09:27 AM

Quote :

"she woke me up last night because she was craving sweetened condensed milk. guess which tool put on his slippers and went to the store? (it was me) "

PLEASE explain to me why she can wake up in the middle of the night craving something... can't she wait 'til morning? Wouldn't she be sleeping MORE since she's growing a baby???

5/4/2007 2:21:02 AM

i've heard those kinds of stories before, but it does sound pretty crazy

5/4/2007 2:22:02 AM

Quote :

"Jesus, if thats love, I never want it."

hahhaha.

yeah and uhhh ill remember never to get knocked up. cuz i'd feel bad for the babydaddy havin to deal with those gross side-effects for 9mths

[Edited on May 4, 2007 at 7:23 AM. Reason : .]

5/4/2007 7:09:27 AM

pics!?!

5/4/2007 7:16:27 AM

this thread is useless without pics

5/4/2007 7:18:16 AM

I've got two kids now and my wife didn't get any of that, with the exception of some stretch marks.

Quote :

"I still don't understand why the fathers want to be in the room."

Amen. I knew I didn't want to see, but I accidentally caught a glimpse off of a reflection from a picture hanging on the opposite wall. That ruined any chance of her getting oral from me for a good year or so until I could get that image out of my head

5/4/2007 7:51:00 AM

how sure are you that the baby is yours?

5/4/2007 9:00:08 AM

Quote :

"I still don't understand why the fathers want to be in the room. It's not a pretty process."

i thought it was an amazing process.

although my baby momma didn't have any of the symptoms yours has.

there are some women who never return to pre-pregnancy anything.

Quote :

"ok i'm heading home. guys,think of me when you're blowing your load in your girl tonight, and remember that there's always that .008 chance..... and how happy you are with your life. (not that mine's bad or anything, it's just a different kind of good)"

i agree, it is a different kind of good. although i can't stay out till all hours, stay up for days tracking trends in the market, hang out with friends 24/7, etc... i can say that hanging out with my kid is pretty damned cool.

Quote :

"PLEASE explain to me why she can wake up in the middle of the night craving something... can't she wait 'til morning? Wouldn't she be sleeping MORE since she's growing a baby???"

according to my woman, it's hard to sleep with something akin to an alien poking out of your stomach, pressing on your organs (reducing the amount of oxygen you can process), affecting her nervous system, wreaking havoc on your hormones, etc... not being able to toss and turn would bother the hell out of me.

5/4/2007 10:41:22 AM

set em up

5/4/2007 10:44:39 AM