Republican18 All American 16575 Posts user info edit post |
How can you do it? Long story short, I had a pregnancy scare with my ex, and we broke up over it. She was not pregnant thank God but I made it absolutely clear how much i do not want kids at all ever. She couldn't be with a dude who didn't want a family some day.....but thats beside the point. the reason i don't want kids is two fold: one is that i enjoy spending what little money i have on myself and my woman. i want a relationship where we can be free to enjoy ourselves without worrying about finding a babysitter just to have a night to ourselves. family stuff sucks and if we ever got divorced its is so much easier to cut ties without any fucking rug rats running around. also, if i bite the dust i don't want someone dependant on me, i have the absolute minimum life insurance policy offered by my department, just enough to cover my ass with dirt, no one is profiting from my death fuck that life insurance shit. Now my second reason, which pissed off the ex, is that i have such a cynical view of the world there is no way i could ever bring a child into this world in good conscience. there is so much hate, crime, war, evil and fucked up shit in the world that i would never want a kid to have to experience it. better to never exist than to have to see this bleak excuse for reality that is our world. Anyways, thats why i dont want kids, people with kids, i dont see how you do it.
oh yeah, when you do have a kid, you spend like 16 years trying to raise him right, teach him morality and ethics, right n wrong etc, and then despite your efforts he becomes a father resenting crack head.......fuck that shit. i will keep the college savings account for myself
[Edited on December 8, 2007 at 3:23 PM. Reason : .] 12/8/2007 3:19:16 PM |
hollister All American 1498 Posts user info edit post |
Sounds like you made a good choice.
Now go and have those bad boys snipped so's you don't have another scare. 12/8/2007 3:20:38 PM |
Republican18 All American 16575 Posts user info edit post |
ya know, after the scare i am seriously considering it.....im a wuss though when it comes to a person near my nuts with a knife. 12/8/2007 3:24:42 PM |
ambrosia1231 eeeeeeeeeevil 76471 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "Now my second reason, which pissed off the ex, is that i have such a cynical view of the world there is no way i could ever bring a child into this world in good conscience." |
That's why I'm adopting.
They're already born, and they need a home.12/8/2007 3:43:07 PM |
Republican18 All American 16575 Posts user info edit post |
true, im glad im not alone in my bleak world view.
[Edited on December 8, 2007 at 3:56 PM. Reason : .] 12/8/2007 3:52:27 PM |
pwrstrkdf250 Suspended 60006 Posts user info edit post |
I could get snipped and not care
I'd adopt a kid in a heartbeat if I had to 12/8/2007 4:07:55 PM |
hollister All American 1498 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "true, im glad im not alone in my bleak world view." |
not trying to change your mind here, but kids do wonders for that sort of thing.
re: knives & nuts - understandable, but I don't think there's much (if any) info out there about the equipment you're interested in using not working after a vasectomy.12/8/2007 4:14:02 PM |
ambrosia1231 eeeeeeeeeevil 76471 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "but I don't think there's much (if any) info out there about the equipment you're interested in using not working after a vasectomy." |
I don't think it's the functionality he's concerned about.
It's the concept of sharp objects + genitals.
Quote : | "not trying to change your mind here, but kids do wonders for that sort of thing." |
A lot of the time? Probably. Often enough to make a blanket statement? Doubtful.
He is not insulated against the shit in this world the way that a majority of people are. It's a constant.
You don't need to have had kids in order to see, and appreciate, the good in life. Having kids doesn't change the fact that there's a whole lot of stuff out there that you'd rather not exist. Cynicism is a good thing - in moderation. So, too, is paranoia.
[Edited on December 8, 2007 at 4:26 PM. Reason : sldkj]12/8/2007 4:23:27 PM |
Republican18 All American 16575 Posts user info edit post |
ha yup 12/8/2007 4:26:40 PM |
jbtilley All American 12797 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "there is so much hate, crime, war, evil and" |
selfish people that only care about themselves 12/8/2007 4:52:04 PM |
sylvershadow All American 7049 Posts user info edit post |
I wish I could get my tubes tied as easily as guys can get a vasectomy. 12/8/2007 4:52:43 PM |
roddy All American 25834 Posts user info edit post |
my brother in law was the same way, no kids no kids no kids(due to his childhood) and my sister convinced him to have 1 and then another...she would of had more but after a boy and girl he got fixed.... 12/8/2007 4:53:36 PM |
frugal_qualm All American 1398 Posts user info edit post |
I dated a guy who was snipped- if you really don't want kids its perfect. They knock you out, in surgery less than an hour, you go home that day. Ice the crotch for a week, no sex for two, and you are good for life. His best friend had a woman "on birth control" and ended up with twins cause she was too lazy to refill her prescription. Thats her story, at least. They did it together as a "fuck women" after she took him to the cleaners in child support. 12/8/2007 5:17:00 PM |
CharlesHF All American 5543 Posts user info edit post |
Sounds pretty selfish to me. 12/8/2007 6:24:40 PM |
colter All American 8022 Posts user info edit post |
I don't know. I agree I guess.Like you said, I never want to have my part in bringing someone into a life so full of horrible things. I also don't know how I'd deal with it, I'd probably be a bad father. 12/8/2007 6:55:10 PM |
wolfpack0122 All American 3129 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "better to never exist than to have to see this bleak excuse for reality that is our world. " |
So do you hate your parents? seems like you wish you were never born. People who wish they were never born tend to think about suicide. You may want to talk to someone.
I have 2 kids and its amazing. Did I think I was a little young when we had them? sure. But I wouldn't change anything.
Quote : | "i enjoy spending what little money i have on myself and my woman" |
You know you are allowed to make more...12/8/2007 6:55:39 PM |
Kurtis636 All American 14984 Posts user info edit post |
I don't ever want to have kids either. I feel you man, there's no way I would ever want the burden of children. 12/8/2007 6:58:30 PM |
CharlieEFH All American 21806 Posts user info edit post |
I see this as an opportunity to improve the overall human gene pool. Your sacrifice is greatly appreciated. 12/8/2007 7:16:57 PM |
Aficionado Suspended 22518 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "Sounds pretty selfish to me." |
this response has always intrigued me
last time i checked, you can do whatever the hell you want when it comes to reproduction
its like you are his parent and you really want grandkids and you are running a guilt trip on him
[Edited on December 8, 2007 at 7:31 PM. Reason :
12/8/2007 7:30:30 PM |
Nighthawk All American 19623 Posts user info edit post |
Damn I'm glad some of ya'll ain't having kids. Kids can limit your activities (no I can't just pick my wife up after work and cruise to a buddies kegger or a concert) but open you up to lots of new things. They aren't a damn burden, they are a blessing. I was a listless, going nowhere fast motherfucker with no direction and only gave a shit about myself. After getting married and having my boys, I have goals, got into the career I want if not the pay yet, have a fairly nice house, and am generally pretty happy.
As for spending money, you can still spend on your significant other and yourself. You just have to ration out what you really want, instead of just impulse buying every piece of junk you've ever thought you'd need. As I type this I'm ordering my wifes Christmas presents, but I'm also working hard to get a Wii for my boys for their Christmas. They are into games, so is my wife, and wouldn't you know it, I am too. So spending on them also means I'm spending on something I will enjoy too. Hell my kid can already kick ass on lots of games at 4 that are pretty difficult. He's been playing Clone Wars with me on X-Box today, and beat the game this evening. Now instead of fighting the n00bs and 12 year olds online if I want to play somebody, my kid can give me a run, and sometimes beat my ass at games.
As for how fucking terrible this world is, you gloomy motherfuckers better realize that we have had war since man first picked up a stick. Natural disasters have been going on since this little rock coalesced into existence. Basically this shit is nothing new. Just before ma and pa in a farm out in the midwest didn't know shit about what was going on outside of their little county, or the state if they got the paper. Now with everything we have, I can pull up live news from any fucking where on this rock with a couple clicks of the mouse. Doesn't make the world any worse, just means we have more information and knowledge at our disposal than ever before. 12/8/2007 7:33:10 PM |
CharlesHF All American 5543 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "I see this as an opportunity to improve the overall human gene pool. Your sacrifice is greatly appreciated." |
You win this thread.12/8/2007 7:35:54 PM |
CharlesHF All American 5543 Posts user info edit post |
In Republican18's defense, I believe he's an LEO. Earlier he made a post about a "shotgun suicide". I would assume that being an LEO and possibly seeing the darker side of society would tend give someone a different world view than the average joe-sixpack. 12/8/2007 7:38:01 PM |
Hurley Suspended 7284 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "They aren't a damn burden, they are a blessing. I was a listless, going nowhere fast motherfucker with no direction and only gave a shit about myself. After getting married and having my boys, I have goals, got into the career I want if not the pay yet, have a fairly nice house, and am generally pretty happy." |
be sure to understand that there are people that can change direction/form goals/improve their life without having to have a child to do that.
In my opinion it's the same with religion. I know many a religious person that thinks nobody can live a truly happy and satisfactory life without being religious - yet there are people that do it every day with no problem.
I am glad that the parents who have posted in this thread are happy and seem to be doing well with parenting.12/8/2007 7:44:56 PM |
KeB All American 9828 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "im a wuss though when it comes to a person near my nuts with a knife. " |
if you are man enough to have sex then you should be man enough for just about anything (including children or having your shit snipped)
So quit being a immature fucking pussy, if you are going to fuck be ready for the consequences or sit at home and take care of it yourself....
and you are 26 years old.....
[Edited on December 8, 2007 at 7:49 PM. Reason : republicans....]12/8/2007 7:46:48 PM |
Hurley Suspended 7284 Posts user info edit post |
^thanks for shitting up the thread. 12/8/2007 7:55:17 PM |
joe17669 All American 22728 Posts user info edit post |
^^ probably knocked a girl up and ruined his life
personally, i look forward to the day that i want to have kids. i dont know when that will be, but I'm excited at the fact that I'm going to be a dad one day.
As for right now, I don't think I'm ready to have kids, and I'm not exactly ready to settle down to raise a family. ] 12/8/2007 7:59:43 PM |
Nighthawk All American 19623 Posts user info edit post |
I never said your only way to happiness is from kids. I was just saying I never exactly planned to have kids this young, and rather than seeing it as a burden, it has helped turn me around. It could fuck your whole self-centered world all up though, and yea you can have a hundred different things that make you turn around. I was just saying they have been the complete opposite of a burden for me. Your results may vary, obviously. 12/8/2007 8:04:05 PM |
KeB All American 9828 Posts user info edit post |
^^and ^^^ no i am just a man that knows that you have to deal with the decisions that I make. In life, the purpose of having sex is to reproduce. Yes we all do it for fun and satisfaction but there are consequences. He is whining about not having the money to raise a kid or he doesn't want to bring a kid into this world then he should be having sex.
Maybe when you both get a lil older you will see what reality really is.
I have sex BUT i am prepared to deal with the consequences whatever they may be.
Not to mention he's not some 18 year old making this post, he's 26 and a grown man. There is no excuse why he can't make the right decisions as an adult
If you don't want to have kids then the easiest way to avoid that is to not have sex. PERIOD Plus I thought republicans frowned upon premarital sex anyhow
[Edited on December 8, 2007 at 8:08 PM. Reason : ...] 12/8/2007 8:08:18 PM |
Hurley Suspended 7284 Posts user info edit post |
I really think the dude just wants a few different views on the subject matter, instead of being crucified for his opinion.
you must not like republicans, huh? still shitting up this thread 12/8/2007 8:32:30 PM |
Republican18 All American 16575 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "So quit being a immature fucking pussy, if you are going to fuck be ready for the consequences or sit at home and take care of it yourself...." |
how is deciding not to have kids selfish and immature? i realize i wouldnt be a good father, i realize that i dont want them and therefore i am not going to have them. its the ones that shouldnt have kids but do it anyways that are the selfish ones. and i am mature enough for the consequences of fucking, im just thankful it turned out that she wasnt pregnant.
Quote : | "Not to mention he's not some 18 year old making this post, he's 26 and a grown man. There is no excuse why he can't make the right decisions as an adult" |
i make the right decisions man, i have DECIDED i dont want kids and am responsible about that. you are talking about this like its an abortion thread.
[Edited on December 8, 2007 at 9:38 PM. Reason : .]12/8/2007 9:35:34 PM |
KeB All American 9828 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "I really think the dude just wants a few different views on the subject matter" |
Quote : | "still shitting up this thread" |
And i gave my view on the subject.
so are you too naive to realize that different opinions are going to surface about issues brought up on this message board or just too busy dickriding republican18 to understand.
if this thread were about what he should do after getting a girl pregnant it would be 10 pages long by now along with views of all sorts on the matter.
I am just saying if you are not ready to handle getting a girl pregnant you should either a. prolong from having sex until you are ready or b. get your stuff taken care of in order to prevent that from happening. I am in no way crucifying him for his actions. he has already had a scare apparently and hopefully that has made him realize exactly what the consequences of his actions have been. I am not trying to crucify, just trying to bring light to the fact that if he really feels that strongly against having kids, why not make that a 0% possibility by either not having sex or getting snipped.12/8/2007 9:41:43 PM |
ambrosia1231 eeeeeeeeeevil 76471 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "He is whining about not having the money to raise a kid or he doesn't want to bring a kid into this world then he should be having sex." |
He didn't say he didn't have money for a kid. He said he'd rather allocate his money towards him and his woman.
And equating not wanting a kid with not being responsible enough for one is idiotic. I mean, hell...by your logic, despite wanting to raise kids, but not wanting any of my own (biologically; they'd lose SO hard in the genetic lottery), that means I'm not responsible enough to be having sex.
Quote : | "There is no excuse why he can't make the right decisions as an adult" |
What right decision are you thinking he hasn't made? Are you trying to imply that having kids = a good, proper, expected choice, and that not doing so is a bad decision?
Quote : | "I am just saying if you are not ready to handle getting a girl pregnant you should either a. prolong from having sex until you are ready or b. get your stuff taken care of in order to prevent that from happening. " |
I think the point of this thread was more along the lines of 'wow. Now that this has happened, it's cemented my decision'. Not a "I'm not sure I'm ready to be snipped' thread.
[Edited on December 8, 2007 at 9:46 PM. Reason : kjd]
[Edited on December 8, 2007 at 9:46 PM. Reason : dlfjk]
[Edited on December 8, 2007 at 9:49 PM. Reason : lkj]12/8/2007 9:44:07 PM |
Republican18 All American 16575 Posts user info edit post |
dude i think i knew what the consequences were prior to having sex. and i am ready to handle the consequences of any action i take. in this case however, yes, i am glad she is not pregnant and it made it abundantly clear to me how much i really dont want kids. there is nothing wrong with this view point, i am not selfish i am being responsible, and most guys have a scare at some point in their sexual lives so its not like anyone is being totally irresponsible. but i did learn a lesson from this and im better off for it. as for my bleak view, i am certainly not suicidal but i am cynical and realistic about the world and yes that has a large part to do with being a cop. i go to domestics all the time and see crack babies of parents that shouldnt have kids, i see violence and i see depressing stuff....and i can cope with it i just dont want a kid to have to cope with it or with me getting killed someday. those of you that are being unnecessarily harsh towards me really have no basis for it. i am in no way talking down to people that have or want kids, more power to you i wish you all the best......i am just stating my opinion about MY personal outlook on the issue. it reflects me only, so quit being dicks about it
Quote : | "I think the point of this thread was more along the lines of 'wow. Now that this has happened, it's cemented my decision'. Not a "I'm not sure I'm ready to be snipped' thread." |
thanks ambrosia
[Edited on December 8, 2007 at 9:51 PM. Reason : .]12/8/2007 9:49:29 PM |
Hurley Suspended 7284 Posts user info edit post |
^^^dude, I'm calmer than you are.
if you're cool with the thread, then so be it.
but where does the republican part come into play? trolling?
[Edited on December 8, 2007 at 9:53 PM. Reason : had to ask ]
[Edited on December 8, 2007 at 9:56 PM. Reason : V - that was for KeB]
[Edited on December 8, 2007 at 10:04 PM. Reason : shorten this damned post] 12/8/2007 9:52:11 PM |
Republican18 All American 16575 Posts user info edit post |
i dont give a fuck about the republican party or what an evangelical says i should do with my life 12/8/2007 9:54:43 PM |
KeB All American 9828 Posts user info edit post |
well i apologize for my harshness, in your first post it just seems like your attitude towards the situation was selfish but i do understand what you are saying at this point. I am def not going to be the first guy to say that i haven't had a scare, it just seems that there is an abundance of idiots out there these days that don't realize that consequences follow the actions you take just as some in this thread have shown. Maybe it is my older age or the fact that I have been in and out of shit in my life girl/relationship related where the girl just didn't seem to give a fuck about their actions.
As you said you have seen that there are way too many idiots bringing kids into the world today and mainly my statement was "if you are going to have sex, there is a chance to a have a kid." in order to avoid that you have choices otherwise
^the republican thing was just a jab at his name, nothing else
[Edited on December 8, 2007 at 10:00 PM. Reason : ..] 12/8/2007 9:59:41 PM |
joepeshi All American 8094 Posts user info edit post |
Don't come to me when you're trying to sign up for a Medicare Part D plan. 12/8/2007 10:00:40 PM |
KeB All American 9828 Posts user info edit post |
all you TWWers come watch what the old people do on saturday nights
i'm going to the bar.....lol
[Edited on December 8, 2007 at 10:03 PM. Reason : ;;] 12/8/2007 10:02:38 PM |
HUR All American 17732 Posts user info edit post |
maybe i'll change when i get older but at this point i dread the idea of having kids
a. changing diapers b. extreme time consumption during early years c. seems like lots of wives let themselves go looks wise after having kids d. crying lots of crying e. major money pit f. getting up in the middle of the night to feed baby g. lose ability to spend time for myself as much h. heard sex decreases with couples after kids
From my list I think the part i most dread is the first few years until children are semi self sufficient. Still taht is like 5-6 years of my life if i have two kids. 12/8/2007 10:08:53 PM |
bottombaby IRL 21954 Posts user info edit post |
I work with parents and small children. I've got to say that parents really seem to be some of the happiest and most fulfilled people that I have ever met. The pride that they take in their children and the love that they get in return just seems to make up for all of the trivial inconveniences. 12/8/2007 10:20:06 PM |
Wolfman Tim All American 9654 Posts user info edit post |
I don't want to have kids. I mean my nephews are cool, but I don't think I could deal with that. 12/8/2007 10:29:41 PM |
HUR All American 17732 Posts user info edit post |
omg lil johnny said papa how exciting!!!!!!!!!!!! 12/8/2007 11:02:23 PM |
SouthPaW12 All American 10141 Posts user info edit post |
I'm gonna have kids b/c I think I'll eventually enjoy them, but I can safely say I understand & respect Republican18 100%.
I have that EXACT same viewpoint, but I think my wife is nice enough to overcome the negatives of the world and influence our kid the right way.
But dude, I feel ya. You're on point. 12/8/2007 11:25:30 PM |
Republican18 All American 16575 Posts user info edit post |
thanks man 12/8/2007 11:32:24 PM |
ambrosia1231 eeeeeeeeeevil 76471 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "maybe i'll change when i get older but at this point i dread the idea of having kids
a. changing diapers b. extreme time consumption during early years c. seems like lots of wives let themselves go looks wise after having kids d. crying lots of crying e. major money pit f. getting up in the middle of the night to feed baby g. lose ability to spend time for myself as much h. heard sex decreases with couples after kids" |
a) meh b) ranging from 'meh' to c) ... d) That IS something I am concerned about e) Not too big a concern f) I'm no longer used to a full night's sleep, and between the dog and the cat, waking up in the middle of the night is not so bad. Plus, my bf is goddamn considerate, and he'd help with this. And I have sharp elbows g) meh
h) meh12/9/2007 12:23:02 AM |
JCASHFAN All American 13916 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "They aren't a damn burden, they are a blessing. I was a listless, going nowhere fast motherfucker with no direction and only gave a shit about myself. After getting married and having my boys, I have goals, got into the career I want if not the pay yet, have a fairly nice house, and am generally pretty happy." | I not saying that this is the situation in Nighthawk's case, but I think a lot of people have kids precisely because it adds meaning to otherwise meaningless lives.
Lets face it, we're not all going to grow up to fulfill our dreams, there is only one President of the United States every 4 years and the vast majority of us will settle for somewhere short of our dreams in the vast field of mediocrity. But if we have a kid, why then we might give rise to the next Secretary General of the United Nations, the man who will bring peace to the world, and at the very least we can look down our noses at those horrible, horrible, people who chose to allocate their disposable income towards themselves instead of children.
I'm sorry parents, you had unprotected sex. Its not really a big deal. Get over yourselves.12/9/2007 12:54:38 AM |
Skack All American 31140 Posts user info edit post |
Even though I don't have kids, I totally want them some day. Just not right now. It's a responsibility thing for me. I like to have fun and disposable income right now and, honestly, when I do have kids I'd say that my life will be more about them whereas it is all about myself right now. I don't see anything wrong with spending years of your life dedicated to yourself, but I don't think I want to do this for the next several decades or anything. 12/9/2007 1:37:36 AM |
skokiaan All American 26447 Posts user info edit post |
Everyone is glad you decided not to reproduce
Quote : | "I think a lot of people have kids precisely because it adds meaning to otherwise meaningless lives" |
Indeed. I know guys who are thrilled about their kids. I know guys who are less than thrilled because their life as they knew it before pretty much ended.
kids = expensive world of warcraft. You are selfish if you don't login
[Edited on December 9, 2007 at 2:46 AM. Reason : .]12/9/2007 2:35:57 AM |
lewoods All American 3526 Posts user info edit post |
If you had to spawn just to have some purpose to your life, sounds like you are a useless loser and shouldn't have had kids.
I had my tubes tied, and yes I am 24. If you are completely sure you don't want kids, man up and get it done before you fuck up your life with the words "I'm pregnant" It's VERY simple for guys, and some docs even use lasers so it's knife free if you are that big of a pussy. It's REALLY important for guys, because you don't get to decide if the kid is born or not like the woman does, you just get screwed out of a third of your income for 18 years.
There is a small risk of spontaneous reversal (body healing itself) but it's less than 2% lifetime risk. Since the risk increases with time, I might have the boyfriend get snipped about 10 years after my surgery just to make damn sure there are no kid issues EVER. 12/9/2007 10:21:47 AM |
RalNCSUBoy All American 1042 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | ""Sounds pretty selfish to me."" |
Oh, please..enough with the selfish comments. There are many parents out there who DO have kids for selfish reasons without any best interest for the children.
[Edited on December 9, 2007 at 11:09 AM. Reason : a]12/9/2007 11:08:28 AM |