I heard a few years ago he bought a 1-way plane ticket to Kenya, flew over there, tracked down a fucking LION, and kicked that bastard SQUARE IN THE NUTS.

1/30/2008 11:19:13 AM

true story.

1/30/2008 11:19:55 AM

that was just one time. another time i tied a vaccum cleaner cord around my neck and then opened the window and tossed the whole thing out the 4th floor window

1/30/2008 11:21:52 AM

was that the one with the 50 foot cord i let you borrow?

1/30/2008 11:22:47 AM

and another time he hooked up a vacuum to his cock, then stood in the 4th floor window tossing off for all to see.

1/30/2008 11:23:00 AM

yeah, sorry for lying and saying i lost it. i would have faced you but i had like 17 needles in my arm from trying to inject bleach into my veins to kill myself

1/30/2008 11:24:00 AM

^^^ It turned out to be one of those small dirt devil vacuums. All he really managed to do was to create a very awkward necklace.

[Edited on January 30, 2008 at 11:25 AM. Reason : not enough ^s]

1/30/2008 11:24:22 AM

kinda like Flava Flav!!!

1/30/2008 11:24:56 AM

Yes, but domestic.

1/30/2008 11:25:39 AM

ahahahahaha

1/30/2008 11:27:07 AM

1/30/2008 11:28:50 AM

gosh, i suck so much i even fail at ending my miserable life. and the really embarrassing stuff hasnt even been said yet. gosh i hope emce doesnt see this thread

1/30/2008 11:29:25 AM

he will
i'll see to that

1/30/2008 11:31:11 AM

i heard he went to mexico specifically to drink the water. and brought some back in case the first dose didnt give him a disease. hardcore suicide attempt there

1/30/2008 12:18:51 PM

i heard he walked up to Chuck Norris and called him a pussy

1/30/2008 12:23:52 PM

i heard he walked up to BritneySpears14 and put on his robe and wizard hat

1/30/2008 12:25:41 PM

I'm watching you

1/30/2008 2:01:25 PM

Quote :

"fucking LION"

naw, that was actually Third!!! not a lion

1/30/2008 2:10:46 PM

I heard he double majored in Aerospace and Nuclear Engineering and that he yelled, "fuck you," to a group of black people outside a pizza parlor in Chapel Hill.

1/30/2008 2:13:01 PM

hahah i trained sn00p and third to be attack cats in that old outdoor shed thing at my old house on maynard road. then one day i wanted to die, so i walked out there covered in COW BLOOD and they clawed me and almost licked me to detah with the little things on their weird cat tongues. but once again, i survived (and failed suicide, just like everything else)

1/30/2008 2:13:34 PM

I remember this

1/30/2008 2:21:25 PM

you named a cat 'third"?
as in ender's game?
as in orson scott card?
who lives in greensboro, NC?

I think I see a connection here.

1/30/2008 2:21:27 PM

Quote :

"I heard he double majored in Aerospace and Nuclear Engineering and that he yelled, "fuck you," to a group of black people outside a pizza parlor in Chapel Hill."

aahaha

who did that in real life again?

1/30/2008 2:24:00 PM

if it wasn't for this tiny detail:

Quote :

"Aerospace and Nuclear Engineering"

I'd say it was OneNighter86

1/30/2008 2:26:45 PM

jackleg brah, dont try to play it off.


we know you're life is pathetic and that you tried to end up. no need to get your butt buddy to make it seem that you were just fucking around. because really, you're a sad old ex druggy with nothing to live for

1/30/2008 4:49:44 PM

1/30/2008 4:51:27 PM

1/30/2008 4:53:29 PM

1/30/2008 4:56:07 PM

"I saw Andy earlier in the day he asked for a 6 foot length of rope"

"aww jesus you didnt give it to him did ya?"

"yea, how the fuck was i supposed to know"


i butchered the hell outta these lines

1/30/2008 4:56:15 PM

lol... a black pedophile and a white ex redneck druggy posting pictures..

aint that nice.

1/30/2008 4:58:37 PM

why don't you put your playlist in here so we can go 3-3

1/30/2008 4:59:42 PM

1/30/2008 5:00:35 PM

only if you post it for me

1/30/2008 5:01:09 PM

bbl with more exciting stories of more suicides and other things i've failed at in life

1/30/2008 5:02:29 PM

This is turning into a creative suicide thread. That could be fun.

Calling Chuck Norris a pussy won't result in death. He'll actually bless you with partial chuckness. You will proceed to live forever, but without the mighty skill of Chuck that will enable you to leverage your longevity into greatness. Instead, you'll be reduced to misery as everything you know and love eventually dies. You'll spend eternity begging for a death that won't come. Eventually, the world will end and you will sit alone in front of the gates of paradise barred from entering. Periodically, Chuck will emerge from the realm of divine bliss and holy beat-downs to kick you in the nuts.

1/30/2008 5:02:33 PM

Quote :

" DRUGS ARE BAD "

1/30/2008 5:04:24 PM

so jackleg... how much does it take to overdose on oxycodine ( sp ) ?

1/30/2008 5:11:24 PM

^ I hear it's based on your body weight to emo ratio.

1/30/2008 5:21:40 PM

^true story

1/30/2008 5:29:29 PM

1/30/2008 5:30:18 PM

i heard he had a glock 22 in his mouth during the whole "mellon collie and the infinite sadness" CD



WHAT

4/6/2008 6:36:55 PM

Quote :

" How Jackleg tried to kill himself"

I would have put money on there being some drugs involved....

4/6/2008 6:47:18 PM

albuquerque, new mexico. may 2006.

60 valium, 40 vicodin

ZERO LUCK

4/6/2008 6:48:06 PM

OR A LOT OF LUCK


see what i did there

4/6/2008 6:48:42 PM

we all know that it wasnt a real suicide attempt... because of that monster fucking tolerance.

4/6/2008 6:49:08 PM

SQUAH IN DA NUTS

4/6/2008 6:50:56 PM