...you didn't need to know.

1. Strip the skin off a rattlesnake, tie off the flesh at one end, fill it with pee, tie off the other end, and toss it around your neck in case you need a cool drink on your hike.

2. You can squeeze the water out of giant piles of animal dung for a refreshing drink.

3. Raw snakes, fish, day old zebra meat, etc. is all fair game.

4. If it crawls or squirms you can pop it in your mouth for a tasty treat. You may want to squeeze it from head to tail and watch the feces and intestines squirt out first.

...moar.

I'm just waiting for one of them to tell us about the untapped source of protein that they have been ignoring thus far.

8/13/2008 8:29:31 PM

5. Instead of sleeping in the shelter you made, sleep in a hotel when you turn the cameras off.

8/13/2008 8:46:32 PM

Quote :

"Strip the skin off a rattlesnake, tie off the flesh at one end, fill it with pee, tie off the other end, and toss it around your neck in case you need a cool drink on your hike."

any smart tip taker would know that the cool pee just wont cut it. gotta drink it while hot.

8/13/2008 8:47:23 PM

I'm pretty sure it was hot by the time he drank it. At least a couple of hours passed.

8/13/2008 10:18:39 PM

i cant imagine that eating insects will fill me up
unless it was a whole colony of ants

8/13/2008 10:23:24 PM

don't bring survivorman into this shit

8/13/2008 10:23:40 PM

I've got to be on the verge of dying from dehydration before I'll even consider drinking my own piss.

I've also got to be pretty damn hungry before I eat insects, but at least that's conceivable to me.

8/13/2008 10:59:33 PM

Sometimes I see those big black ants trying to crawl on the hummingbird feeder and I think about all the free protein I'm wasting.

8/13/2008 11:06:52 PM

Les Stroud/Survivor Man >>>>>>>>>>>>>> Bear Grylls/Man vs. Wild

oh, and

Quote :

"5. Instead of sleeping in the shelter you made, sleep in a hotel when you turn the cameras off."

[Edited on August 13, 2008 at 11:10 PM. Reason : #5]

8/13/2008 11:10:20 PM

Who cares. Go sleep outside all you want. I don't see you drinking any piss out of a rattlesnake hide.

8/13/2008 11:13:12 PM

Ay....Where can I find a monitor lizard around here?

8/14/2008 10:52:32 PM

So I just watched Bear eat some Prickly Pear Cacti. I happen to have a shit ton of them in my yard. So guess what I"m going to start eating?

9/11/2008 11:32:54 PM

they`re pretty bland. you can use them for some ok jelly though.

9/11/2008 11:39:18 PM

Quote :

"Strip the skin off a rattlesnake, tie off the flesh at one end, fill it with pee, tie off the other end, and toss it around your neck in case you need a cool drink on your hike."

No. Urine consumption does nothing to hydrate you. If you were over-hydrated and pissing clear in the beginning . . . maybe. But once you're pissing yellow, you're fucked. Blood doesn't work either. It is a food, not hydration.

9/11/2008 11:42:03 PM

I always piss yellow.
Highlighter yellow that almost glows in the dark.
Thanks to my Vitamin B6 intake.

[Edited on September 11, 2008 at 11:43 PM. Reason : l]

9/11/2008 11:43:42 PM

I'm not saying you're fucked if you're drinking and you're pissing yellow normally, just that if you're in a survival situation and your piss is already yellow due to low fluid levels and you try to drink your piss to re-hydrate then you're not going to gain any real value from it.

I'm not really interested in your personal urine tint

9/11/2008 11:46:25 PM

I'm just saying; I can save you a sample if you need to see it.

9/11/2008 11:49:49 PM

bears accent is just cool as shit.

lee he just speaks in a monotone and is like yeap you could die.

bear GRILLS lol ftw

9/11/2008 11:51:24 PM

this is getting dangerously close to urolagnia

9/11/2008 11:53:19 PM

bear grylls

-Specialist Combat Survival Instructor and Patrol Medic for SAS Special Forces unit
-achieved a Guinness World Record as the youngest Briton, at 23, to summit Mount Everest
-circumnavigated the UK on a jet ski ...to raise money
-he led a team of five british men on the first unassisted crossing of the north atlantic arctic ocean, in an open rigid inflatable boat
-the youngest Briton to summit Ama Dablam in the Himalayas

for christs sake, his parachute chord ripped at 16,000 feet causing him to freefall and land flat on his back and broke 3 vertebrae ... the fucker climbs everest a year later




les stroud
-worked for several years at the Toronto-based music video channel MuchMusic
-songwriter for his band New Regime
-garbage collector for the City of Toronto
-makes documentary, Snowshoes and Solitude, which was named Best Documentary at the Muskoka Film Festival and Best Film at the Waterwalker Film Festival.
-makes 50 minute documentary, Off the Grid with Les Stroud, chronicled the process of buying property and refitting an old farm house with solar and wind power, a raincatcher and well
-exceptional blues harmonica player




cameramen or not, if youre stranded in any desolate, treacherous, life threating environment on this earth, who would you want as your guide


bear is a fukn superhuman

[Edited on September 12, 2008 at 1:13 AM. Reason : calling Restricted]

9/12/2008 1:07:49 AM

Quote :

"-achieved a Guinness World Record as the youngest Briton, at 23, to summit Mount Everest"

How can you get a world record for being the youngest British person to do something? That's like being the Wake County hot dog eating champion of the world.

9/16/2008 5:22:55 PM

I'd rather have Les with me for long term survival stuff as long as there wouldn't be any violent conflict

9/16/2008 7:00:33 PM

from a long term stand point, Les would be less annoying so id go with him

9/16/2008 7:01:17 PM

Cook a turtle on an open fire until you poke the shell and it somewhat crumbles.

9/16/2008 7:05:30 PM

TKEshultz left out on his list that Les actually lived in the wilderness for a year with his wife

Quote :

"In the spring of 1994, Les Stroud and Sue Jamison bade farewell to modern society and followed their hearts north into the remote reaches of the Canadian wilderness. Leaving home, family and jobs behind, they would spend the next year living closer to the land than most of us could ever imagine. And they did it without the luxury of a single modern convenience."

9/16/2008 7:20:26 PM

how did that bitch cook with no oven. thats impressive

9/16/2008 7:32:26 PM

6. If you want to make people think you are surviving in an active lava field where you might fall into hot molten magma, just go to a tourist park in Hawaii and don't show the road and the cars and the visitor's center

9/16/2008 7:32:45 PM

6. Instead of posting on TWW and wasting everyone's time, go back to watch those shitty shows.

9/16/2008 9:12:38 PM

you can only drink your piss if it's clear, and you can only drink it once. the increased concentration of urea in the following pisses will cause you to vomit, resulting in you becoming even more dehydrated.

most of the situations they get themselves into for the shows are pretty outlandish anyhow. and, if you can't understand the basics of finding water and building a shelter, you aren't fit to stand up from your computer desk.

9/16/2008 9:26:11 PM

7. If a river is flowing from a glacier, be sure to jump in it. You won't die of hypothermia.

8. If there's a waterfall, be sure to climb up it. You won't slip, fall, and break your leg. You will not die a slow or painful death.

9/16/2008 9:29:57 PM

yeah, if i had to choose between being stuck in the wild with bear or les, i'd pick bear. Atleast his british accent would be entertaining.

9/16/2008 10:55:12 PM

I don't care about authenticity

bear is infinately more entertaining, despite the fact that half the stuff he does would probably get you killed

9/16/2008 11:09:52 PM

Quote :

"6. Instead of posting on TWW and wasting everyone's time, go back to watch those shitty shows."

yes, because TWW is somewhere people go when they don't have any time to waste.

9/16/2008 11:25:20 PM

Quote :

"8. If there's a waterfall, be sure to climb up it. You won't slip, fall, and break your leg. You will not die a slow or painful death. "

Ya, I saw that and thought WTF?! I've rocked climbed while it was raining and the rock is wet and its one of the less pleasant things to do.

9/16/2008 11:34:19 PM

So when Bear is eating those nasty insects and stuff, why does he have to chew/taste them? Obviously they taste horrible. Why can't he just cut them up a little with his knife and swallow them quickly, minimizing the amount that he has to taste?


Also on an episode of Man vs. Wild a few weeks ago, Bear cut the fur off of a sheep he found submerged in a bog in the Irish moors. As he was climbing into it for warmth while sleeping he said "I suppose you could call this a 'sheeping bag' ".

I thought it was hilarious. I love puns.

9/16/2008 11:39:58 PM

9. wrestle aligators, grab poisonous snakes, snatch catfish w/ your bare hands, but bee stings will fuck your world up

9/16/2008 11:43:43 PM

Quote :

"from a long term stand point, Les would be less annoying so id go with him"

I'm not so sure about that. Maybe if you can wrestle that harmonica away from him and throw it in a lava pit. Something tells me that thing would get old fast.

9/17/2008 12:14:43 AM