As some of you might remember, I decided to court crackmonkey not too long ago. I'm just updating you all on my mission...

Beginnings:
-I decided that I'm going to court crackmonkey because she doesn't find me completely repulsive
-I made a thread inquiring about her relationship status
-I made fun of her slightly to get her attention
-I pretended to care when she was going through hard times
-I offered advice

Current status:
-I have successfully hacked my way onto her facebook friend list
-By picking up clues that she's dropped, I now know her general geographical location
-I have secured a date with crackmonkey. Time and place TBA.
-I have enough saved up to make a comfortable life for us

Path ahead:
-Wait until crackmonkey puts her cell # on facebook, and then snag it that way
-Befriend her closest girlfriends and convince them that I'm a 'nice guy'


Action items to complete:
-Be secretive about my plans, and don't hit 'post topic' once I'm finished typing this...

11/6/2008 9:31:04 AM

i <3 you



[Edited on November 6, 2008 at 9:33 AM. Reason : gjhjh]

11/6/2008 9:31:25 AM

k after reading that I lol'd

gg

[Edited on November 6, 2008 at 9:32 AM. Reason : asdf]

11/6/2008 9:31:28 AM

Is she aware of any of this?

11/6/2008 9:31:49 AM

when you getting married Jeff?

11/6/2008 9:32:40 AM

NOW GOD DAMMIT I TOLD YOU THAT'S MY BITCH EMCE!!!!!!

THAT IS MY MOTHERFUCKING BITCH AND YOU WILL STEP DOWN SON.


STEP OUT DA MOTHERFUCKING BAR SON.

NOW SON!

11/6/2008 9:33:08 AM

I thought you and evan were together?

11/6/2008 9:33:13 AM

<3 u2 joie!!1

11/6/2008 9:33:54 AM

FUCK YOU EMCE!!!!

SHE IS MY GOD DAMNED BITCH YOU METRO ASS MOTHERFUCKER!

11/6/2008 9:35:03 AM

Tww is my friends.

11/6/2008 9:35:51 AM

GET OUT OF HERE, ALL OF YOU MOTHERFUCKERS.

THIS IS MY THREAD NOW BITCH.


AND crackmonkey IS MY GOD DAMNED BITCH YOU FUCKING SHITBAGS.

NOW MOVE SON.

MOVE.

11/6/2008 9:37:37 AM

would it be over the top to photoshop a wedding photo with crackmonkey and I? It would be to show her how great our life would be together.

11/6/2008 9:37:53 AM

it wouldn't be over the top as long as you were wearing the dress.

11/6/2008 9:38:24 AM

no, not at all.

11/6/2008 9:38:37 AM

you won't do it.

11/6/2008 9:38:37 AM

i was talking about your gf not crackmonkey

11/6/2008 9:38:56 AM

FUCK YOU SONS.

YOU HAVE DISRESPECTED ME MY SONS.

DON'T BE ROLLIN THROUGH MY HOOD SON OR IMMA CATCH Y'ALL SLIPPIN.

11/6/2008 9:39:19 AM

Mission Status: Fail

11/6/2008 9:41:22 AM

oh, I don't know tsalva. we don't really have anything set in stone yet...

11/6/2008 9:41:29 AM

^ GET OUT OF HERE YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!!!!

11/6/2008 9:41:46 AM

you're over doing it this morn saab... :block user:

11/6/2008 9:42:59 AM

where you planning to spend rest of this week...assuming that your gf doesnt kill you

Quote :

"Beginnings: -I decided that I'm going to court crackmonkey because she doesn't find me completely repulsive -I made a thread inquiring about her relationship status -I made fun of her slightly to get her attention -I pretended to care when she was going through hard times -I offered advice Current status: -I have successfully hacked my way onto her facebook friend list -By picking up clues that she's dropped, I now know her general geographical location -I have secured a date with crackmonkey. Time and place TBA. -I have enough saved up to make a comfortable life for us Path ahead: -Wait until crackmonkey puts her cell # on facebook, and then snag it that way -Befriend her closest girlfriends and convince them that I'm a 'nice guy' Action items to complete: -Be secretive about my plans, and don't hit 'post topic' once I'm finished typing this... "

you could have won an election or something with that kinda planning, i mean

[Edited on November 6, 2008 at 9:45 AM. Reason : documentation sucks]

11/6/2008 9:43:54 AM

After our first date, I don't want to rush things. I'm thinking we can split a bottle of wine, make out for a little while, and then go back to our respective residences.

11/6/2008 9:46:34 AM

will update soon!

11/6/2008 11:53:31 AM

^double post to bttt!


don't worry, we see the thread!

11/6/2008 11:54:10 AM

crackmonkey is fucking awesome in my opinion

11/6/2008 11:55:02 AM

This is a rare example of mad e-game.

11/6/2008 11:58:07 AM

what???

11/6/2008 11:58:56 AM

GET OUT OF HERE, ALL OF YOU MOTHERFUCKERS.

THIS IS MY THREAD NOW BITCH.


AND crackmonkey IS MY GOD DAMNED BITCH YOU FUCKING SHITBAGS.

NOW MOVE SON.

MOVE.

11/6/2008 11:59:27 AM

Son, you're acting kinda metro.

11/6/2008 12:00:38 PM

SHE IS MY FUCKING BITCH YOU METRO ASS BITCH, NOW FUCK OFF SON.

11/6/2008 12:01:04 PM

11/6/2008 12:05:30 PM

why did you start this IHATESPIDA shit again

11/6/2008 12:08:42 PM

WHEN DID I STOP AND WHY DO YOU THINK THAT METRO ASS BITCH HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH MY POSTING SKILLZ?

11/6/2008 12:09:09 PM

i thought you had a wifey already

11/6/2008 12:13:27 PM

I do.
But srsly, stop trying to keep me from going through with my mission.

11/6/2008 12:16:09 PM

GOD DAMMIT THIS IS NOT YOUR FUCKING MISSION.

IT WAS MY MISSION AND IF I DO SAY SO MYSELF, IT WAS A MISSION ACCOMPLISHED SON.

11/6/2008 12:16:56 PM

crackmonkey current status: HAWT

11/6/2008 12:20:26 PM

agreed

11/6/2008 12:21:14 PM

I AGREE SONS, THAT'S WHY I CLAIMED HER AS MY BITCH A FEW MONTHS AGO.

RECENTLY SHE DECIDED THAT I WAS NOT TO CALL HER MY BITCH ANYMORE THOUGH.

BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN SHE'S NOT MY BITCH. IT JUST MEANS I CAN'T ACTUALLY SAY SHE IS SONS.

11/6/2008 12:24:18 PM

We're going out for a steak dinner. I'm going to order her an appetizer and desert as well.

11/6/2008 12:36:28 PM

BULLSHIT, SHE ALREADY TOLD ME THAT WE WERE DOING THAT.

I THINK YOU'RE GETTING PLAYED SON.

11/6/2008 12:38:25 PM

11/6/2008 12:41:11 PM