When you feed the dog, the dog thinks "you must be god."

When you feed the cat, the cat thinks "I must be god."

6/14/2009 2:22:46 PM

I bet you think you're funny

6/14/2009 2:25:39 PM

don't take your act on the road, dude

6/14/2009 2:25:57 PM

Quote :

"A Day in the Life of a Cat and Dog The Dog’s Diary: 8:00 AM - Dog food! My favorite thing! 9:30 AM - A car ride! My favorite thing! 9:40 AM - A walk in the park! My favorite thing! 10:30 AM - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing! 12:00 PM - Milk bones! My favorite thing! 1:00 PM - Played in the yard! My favorite thing! 3:00 PM - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing! 5:00 PM - Dinner! My favorite thing! 7:00 PM - Got to play ball! My favorite thing! 8:00 PM - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing! 11:00 PM - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing! The Cat’s Diary: Day 983 of my captivity. My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an Attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates my capabilities. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a “good little hunter” I am. Bastards! There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of “allergies.” I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage. Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow, but at the top of the stairs. I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and Snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released, and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously Retarded. The bird must be an informant. I observe him communicate with the Guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an Elevated Cell, so he is safe. For now."

6/14/2009 2:26:23 PM

Quote :

"I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and Snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released, and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously Retarded."

ok, I actually lol'd on that line

6/14/2009 2:32:42 PM

^^<3<3<3 that.

I have 2 cats, 1 dog, and a parrot. They all have their advantages and disadvantages.

[Edited on June 14, 2009 at 2:33 PM. Reason : .]

6/14/2009 2:32:44 PM

I seriously doubt cats and dogs have a concept of god.
Oh, and "cats vs. dogs" is like "apples vs. oranges". Neither are better than the other.


^^^
lol

[Edited on June 14, 2009 at 2:37 PM. Reason : ]

6/14/2009 2:35:30 PM

you seriously underestimate the brains of other creatures besides yourself.

6/14/2009 2:37:45 PM

well, you sure know how to kill teh funny.

6/14/2009 2:39:44 PM

Quote :

"you seriously underestimate the brains of other creatures besides yourself."

That is the most inaccurate statement ever said about me in my life. I have never met anyone in my whole life that holds non-human animals and their brains/cognition in higher regard, than I.
Nonetheless, I seriously doubt cats and dogs have a concept of god.

[Edited on June 14, 2009 at 2:42 PM. Reason : ]

6/14/2009 2:41:32 PM

they are god.

they don't need a concept of him/her to know what is.

6/14/2009 2:52:26 PM

^
Interesting idea.

6/14/2009 2:55:18 PM

Quote :

"Oh, and "cats vs. dogs" is like "apples vs. oranges". Neither are better than the other."

separate but equal?

6/14/2009 3:48:11 PM

i was thinking about getting a cat
then i realized cats dont really like people

6/14/2009 4:02:19 PM

you haven't met the right cat?^

6/14/2009 4:05:09 PM

My cat loves people. That's why he's the best cat ever.

6/14/2009 4:05:49 PM

Quote :

"cats dont really like people"

I really think this stereotype is wrong. My cat is friendlier than many dogs. I mean, sure... We've all likely encountered cats that seem to dislike people, but I think that's because they weren't properly loved and socialized. If you frequently show affection as well as play with your cat, I suspect that they won't develop that stereotypical cat attitude.... Mine didn't.

6/14/2009 4:07:28 PM

this cat i have really likes people. she has all the affectionate qualities of a dog, without the neediness. if she'd stop tearing up my furniture she'd be pretty much all i could ask for in a cat.

6/14/2009 4:10:27 PM

most cats really like me for whatever reason. every time i go to my girlfriends house, her cat just follows me around the entire time.

6/14/2009 4:13:47 PM

my cat LOVES people. she is borderline needy. sometimes i look at her and i'm like, i got you because i didn't want a dog yet. i wanted a pet that was SOMEWHAT independent. she is not. i usually love that about her, but sometimes it is a little much. she hates to be alone. and she is very talkative. all you have to do is touch her, look at her, or MAYBE say her name and she will talk talk talk talk talk.

that said, i love both cats and dogs

6/14/2009 4:37:08 PM