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 Message Boards » » thinking of having a 3-some... Page [1]  
longbow_fc
All American
1163 Posts
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long, but quality read...

http://newcastleunited.rivals.net/FORUM/pgePosts.aspx?boardId=103&clubId=55&threadId=520491&pageNumber=1

6/23/2009 7:18:07 PM

hondaguy
All American
6409 Posts
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Quote :
"I plumb it in, so far so good. I am hammering away. For a short while it feels good and you forget the circumstances. I open my eyes and Bulldog right next to me - looking right in my face. Grinning. I didn't put any music on, so the only sound was like a dog walking through mud, only wetter, and my idiot mate right up in my face. So I whipered:
"Fuck off"
"What?"
"Fuck - off"
"Fuck yeahhhh"
"No - fuck off"
"My go!!"
"What"
"Gimme a go"
"I just started"
"Im gonna blow - let me go"
with that he shuffles off in the corner and I can see him out of the corner of my eye getting undressed 'FFLAPP' there was a wet slapping sound, as if someone hit Bulldog, I snap my head around to look... 'FUCK MEEEEEE'
It was Bulldogs cock. It was fucking huge. Like a comedy rubber, foot long, lady slaying monster dick. The noise was as it swung and slapped his thigh!! He then starts wagging it about, trying to get blood in it cos it is too big to just 'wood up' like a normal-un. "

6/23/2009 10:00:28 PM

NeuseRvrRat
hello Mr. NSA!
35386 Posts
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hahahaha

i read the whole thing

pretty funny

6/23/2009 10:45:28 PM

LimpyNuts
All American
16860 Posts
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Quote :
"I look at her pussy. Bulldog had ruined it. It was huge and stretched out of shape like she had just given birth. I could have stuck my whole hand in her cunt and flipped a coin!! "


priceless

6/23/2009 11:03:29 PM

adultswim
Suspended
8379 Posts
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the "my dick feels like corn" part is from dane cook

6/23/2009 11:27:49 PM

melanndelyn
All American
2119 Posts
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^"my puss has the butter"

that dane cook is a silly bitch

6/23/2009 11:28:29 PM

dustm
All American
14297 Posts
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Quote :
"We started kissing. Even that was awful, it was like a hovercraft drove over my face."



ahahaha

6/23/2009 11:34:24 PM

BIGcementpon
Status Name
11323 Posts
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Pretty funny read.
Quote :
"
I remember this next bit, as it is one of my epic FAILS. I had to say something sexy, and wild, but didn't know what to say - all nervous I honestly said the following.....
"Uh, yeaaaah..... my dick feels like corn"
corn... CORN?? what the fuck was I thinking, corn? I panicked and said the first thing t come to mind and it was corn. Lucky for me - she didn't miss a beat and said "Yeah, let me put some butter on it"
....and thats how it started "

I don't care if Dane Cook said it first, its still funny.

6/24/2009 12:37:53 AM

wawebste
All American
19599 Posts
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lol, pretty funny read

6/24/2009 12:59:24 AM

sparky
Garage Mod
12301 Posts
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funny as hell

6/24/2009 7:58:41 AM

LRlilDaddy
All American
6511 Posts
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do it

6/24/2009 8:24:26 AM

vonjordan3
AIR
43669 Posts
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hah

6/24/2009 8:33:21 AM

Jeepin4x4
#Pack9
35784 Posts
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Quote :
"if Dane Cook said it first"



That would be a first!

6/24/2009 8:48:31 AM

LRlilDaddy
All American
6511 Posts
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are you implying that dane cook is unoriginal?

6/24/2009 8:55:30 AM

chocolatervh
All American
22986 Posts
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that was great. i actually read the whole thing. lol

6/24/2009 9:25:59 AM

optmusprimer
All American
30318 Posts
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Quote :
"it was like watching a guy try to post a python through a letterbox"

6/24/2009 10:19:42 AM

quagmire02
All American
44225 Posts
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haha, i lolled

Quote :
"Now, let me just clear up the size issue. It matters. A lot. Trust me. Want to know how I know? Go into a sex shop. All the dildo's are thick 9+ inches or more of monster cock. Never has a woman gone "Uhh, yeah - do you happen to have a sub-average size dildo?" Would never happen. NEVER HAPPEN. The only time you could by a cock my size, all small and ugly with an awkward kink in the middle would be on a key ring. And it would be a joke. "

6/24/2009 11:05:42 AM

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