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 Message Boards » » The IT Guy You Wish You Had Page [1] 2, Next  
Nighthawk
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Saw on Switched about a new and humorous IT blog, The IT Guy You Wish You had. Whats funny is the second post he names himself, Brian Horton, and the next one mentions wcpss.net e-mail accounts. He is a tech guy at one of the middle schools in Wake County. Pretty funny stuff too. Anybody else read it, work with or know the guy, etc?

http://itguyyouwishyouhad.wordpress.com/

1/17/2010 5:53:32 PM

Grandmaster
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Quote :
"Had a student who was working on a project. His teacher approached me about his… searches
This is what he searched for on Google Image:
Tigers
Tigers
Tigers
Tigers having sex
people having sex
The second jump is logical, the first one … what??!"

1/17/2010 6:25:22 PM

wdprice3
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lol. i like this guy

1/17/2010 6:27:44 PM

DeltaBeta
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Quote :
"So, if you are thinking of using the copier, ask yourself: “Am I Mary? Do I make the best collard greens in North Caroline?”
If the answer is no to either question, do not use the copier."

1/17/2010 10:12:52 PM

Solinari
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Quote :
"To: Staff
From: Brian
Subject: Computer Refresh
A few notes regarding Tuesday’s PC refresh. I apologize in advance for the length of this email. I need everyone’s assistance if we are going to get the maximum value from this PC Refresh.

1. If you see or find one of the old “clunkers” in your room or anywhere other than a CTE classroom, please let me know immediately. I am missing a few computers that I would love to find. Exceptions to this are Barnes and Haughton.
2. Computer allocations are not final until next week. I may have to move some new computers around in order to provide the most equitable use of our resources. I am doing everything possible to minimize this.
3. Enter the Teacher’s lounge at your own risk. There is a small path which allows access to the printer, snack machines, kitchen, and restroom. Emphasis on small.
4. If you have a keyboard or mouse that is not very good, or non functional, feel free to swap it out in the teachers lounge. Make sure you test it on Monday as they will be gone on Tuesday. Especially do this if you have PS2 or Ball Mice, these have the green connector on the end with pins. Make sure you get a USB based laser mouse. DO NOT TAKE ANY MICE OR KEYBOARDS, only swap. I wish I had the time to make sure everyone has the best mouse possible, but I don’t. So I’ll need your help to sort through those.
5. If you have a CRT monitor in your room, let me know, I have a few surplus LCD monitors that we can replace them with. I need to know early Monday.
6. If you have any computers that are broken in any way, let me know and I will switch it out with a functional computer that is about to be sent back. There is no sense in keeping a broken computer and sending a good one out.
7. Some of you have new(er) machines in your room, the printers have been set up on these computers. If you are having trouble printing, please wait until Wednesday to ask for assistance.
8. I will be taking machines from Bass, Sharpe, Green, Tenney, Morris, and Casorso on Monday. Please email with a time you will be available to back up files. They will of course be replaced on Tuesday.
9. If you have had computers taken from your room, please try to clean the space where they were located. We got some of them on Saturday, but were unable to get everything. We can not put new computers in a dustbowl. They don’t like it. I am in no way implying that anyone is dirty or unkempt. Computers just attract dust and many have not been moved for a long time.
10. If you have not done so, please purchase a USB drive for backing up documents from personal laptops. I will be replacing 35 of the oldest laptops. All R51’s and R52’s will be replaced on Wednesday or Thursday.
11. If anyone is willing to volunteer a period, I have several tasks that I could use help with before Tuesday rolls around. I would greatly appreciate any time you can give me. Please email me if you can help out.
12. If you are missing a computer cart. I stole it. I’m talking to you Mr. Gaudet. I will return it on Wednesday.
13. The Upstairs sixth grade will be getting a new printer on Wednesday, all new computers that arrive on Tuesday will be programmed to print to the new printer. I will set up the older machines on the printer on Wednesday.

Please note that if you did not receive all the computers you asked for, we will be getting a reallocation of additional computers later in the year. I will try to meet everyone’s requests at that time.

Also, a special thanks to NC Haischer and her husband Tom for volunteering to help out with Saturday’s workday. Without their help, I would still be pushing computers around the school (it’s 9pm)."


Why in the hell is he posting shit like this? It's completely boring and borders on privacy violations.

Also, the only thing remotely funny about this is the fact that he wrote this huge goddamn email and I bet NO ONE read it.... I know I sure as hell wouldn't read this much crap from an IT monkey. I usually auto-delete emails from IT anyway. They're in the service industry and the sooner they figure this out, the better we'll all get along together.

[Edited on January 17, 2010 at 11:11 PM. Reason : s]

1/17/2010 11:09:42 PM

kiljadn
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Pretty sure he works at Ligon Middle.


I don't think he's THAT funny though.

1/17/2010 11:46:53 PM

richthofen
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Quote :
"I usually auto-delete emails from IT anyway. They're in the service industry and the sooner they figure this out, the better we'll all get along together."


So do you expect a phone call every time something important happens that might effect you? I mean I'm sorry if I'm *beneath you* (what exactly do you do that makes you so superior?) but we might have something important to say occasionally that would take way too much time to communicate in any other fashion.

1/18/2010 12:54:07 AM

evan
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^don't feed the troll

1/18/2010 2:01:51 AM

richthofen
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Sigh. You're right.

The fact that I even responded betrays the fact that I am insecure in my job and my skill set and, ultimately, in the wrong field anyway.

[Backs out of thread to go think self-defeating thoughts]

1/18/2010 3:38:33 AM

Solinari
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OK. I was being a little bit melodramatic - I admit.... But still, a full page of text to basically say that he's distributed the new computers and you can get new peripherals in the teacher lounge?

He's seriously wasting everyone's time with that drivel. He needs to learn how to get the damn point.


Quote :
"we might have something important to say occasionally that would take way too much time to communicate in any other fashion."


Make it short and sweet. I've got an attn span of approximately 15 seconds when I get a mass email from any external department, whether its corporate/it/whatever.



And to top it off.... According to this guys blog, he's spamming that school up to 3 times a day with emails like this. RIDICULOUS! I seriously would have set up a filter for his shit on about the second day. Might take a glance through that folder once a week or so.
Quote :
"

To: Staff

From: Brian

Subject: Free Food – For Real
http://www.unthinkfc.com/
Coupons are available until the end of the day and are good until the 19th.
You will have to print these at home. Do not attempt to get a coupon here, it will not work due to a shared IP address violation. It may also invalidate your opportunity to get a coupon.
"


This is SPAM. I would be so pissed off if, of all people, the IT guy was sending this bullshit out.

[Edited on January 18, 2010 at 7:56 AM. Reason : s]

1/18/2010 7:51:07 AM

wdprice3
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shut up, troll. it's annoying as hell.

Quote :
"He's seriously wasting everyone's time with that drivel."

maybe everyone else is wasting his time with their own drivel.

1/18/2010 8:22:32 AM

Solinari
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Ok... fine. I guess I'm trolling when I say that 3 emails a day from the IT guy is too much. Hell, I don't think any one of my coworkers even send out three emails a day and if they do, they sure as hell are business related not, "HEY GUYS CLIKC ON THIS FREE CHICXKEN!1!!"

1/18/2010 8:36:14 AM

wdprice3
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well, how do we know he's not getting stupid emails from at least half of the staff and students? and where to you get that all of these were sent out on the same days? It only shows when they were posted on the website...

1/18/2010 8:38:36 AM

Solinari
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He probably is getting stupid emails from more than half the staff and students. How is that relevant?

1/18/2010 8:46:32 AM

wdprice3
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well, they waste a lot of his time... he wastes 5 minutes of their time... so how is this guy so bad?

1/18/2010 9:12:39 AM

Grandmaster
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someone is a bit sour after being caught browsing TWW on company time.

1/18/2010 10:21:41 AM

Stimwalt
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I'm the IT guy, there is no wishing required, lol.

1/18/2010 10:32:03 AM

Solinari
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he's wasting EVERYONE's time for one thing

he's also diluting his credibility by sending out so many emails that people stop paying attention to any of them.

1/18/2010 12:54:27 PM

Nighthawk
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As 2 schools IT guy, I know I NEVER send mass e-mails out unless its something major like, NCWise is down, a server died, phone server shit the bed, etc. Hell I called my boss on a spam e-mail one day when he sent out a mass e-mail about some new fucking virus that was old news on Snopes.

I still find it humorous and can relate to some of his stuff. Not the funniest shit around, just surprised somebody from Raleigh was getting lots of attention from his blog.

1/18/2010 2:51:59 PM

Solinari
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^ Yea, that sounds reasonable. Sending out a mass email about KFC coupons or printer usage is just annoying and leads to filters directing one's emails to /dev/null

the searches for tigers was pretty funny. he needs to post more of those stories and lay off the rest

[Edited on January 18, 2010 at 2:55 PM. Reason : s]

1/18/2010 2:53:53 PM

mellocj
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yea he sounds quirky.. I wasn't sure if he really sends out those emails or if he is just using that format for blogging -- i.e. typing an email of what he is thinking to send to staff but just blogging it instead?

1/18/2010 3:25:22 PM

HaLo
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^that's what I think it is

1/18/2010 3:43:10 PM

Solinari
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Actually, if you read his blog closely, you'll see that he is actually sending all of these emails out. In one of his later posts, he comments to that effect.

1/18/2010 6:46:17 PM

Noen
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Quote :
"leads to filters directing one's emails to /dev/null"


Except for the 95% of the world who doesn't know about email filters, and the 99.5% of the world who doesn't know what /dev/null is.

You obviously don't have a clue about the technical aptitude of teachers, or the social environment that he works in. And we are talking about 100 people. This isn't some giant corporation.

Pull your panties out of your asshole and live a little. While it may be a revelation to you, some people enjoy their work environment AND the people in it. Personal interests shared at work (within reason) promote bonding and trust. Two things critical to working with other people.

1/18/2010 9:20:35 PM

ScHpEnXeL
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Quote :
"Personal interests shared at work (within reason) promote bonding and trust"

i'm fucked then

1/18/2010 9:24:13 PM

Solinari
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^^ I would redirect the emails to /dev/null. The technically inept would A) ignore the emails and B) get annoyed by constantly getting spammed by them.

And i'm pretty sure that emails every day lauding his own work or berating them for using the wrong printer or not trading in their mouse properly, etc etc. are not common interests with the 100 teachers.

But hey, that's just my opinion.

[Edited on January 18, 2010 at 9:30 PM. Reason : s]

1/18/2010 9:30:10 PM

smc
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If he was my it guy his unnecessarily verbose and snarky emails would go directly to the spam folder, just like the dreamhost newsletters.

1/18/2010 9:47:19 PM

ScHpEnXeL
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OH MAN THAT'D REALLY SHOW HIM

1/18/2010 9:50:03 PM

Solinari
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who gives an F what he thinks - the point of binning/ignoring his emails is to be productive at work and avoid stress.

1/18/2010 9:52:06 PM

Grandmaster
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Quote :
"

We’ve heard it a million times, the computer is infected with sdra, lowsec, skynet, police pro, antivirus pro, netsky, conficker, you name it and it’s got a fresh new hell wormed into the machine. So, you’re sifting through your Hijack this log and the question comes up… “How did I get this?” I don’t go anywhere but Facebook and my kid goes to Webkinz!

*FacePalm*

There is no worse question than trying to explain the intricacies of acquiring viruses. I usually just blame facebook apps, or myspace. And if I know them, I tell them to stop Browsing for gay porn. Unless I know they might be looking for gay porn, then I just say it can come from anywhere.

One of my customers had a really great point though, her money is not going to the idiot (may the fleas of a thousand camels infest his armpits) who wrote XP Antivirus 2010, it’s going to the guy who can remove it. You ever wonder if there some grand conspiracy here that benefits the security companies? Like some secret underground complex deep below Symantec headquarters where a crack team of experts is making the most destructive software known to man. Then the camera pans out and you see an old, bitter, and bearded coder handing a USB key with the only anti-virus on it to some suited executive who smirks and takes the elevator back to ground level.

Anyways, what do you tell them when you get asked, How did I get that?
"


I was with him all the way until the security team conspiracy theory. Everyone knows once the technically savvy spamkings realized instead of mywebsearchbarz/wallpapers/screensavers/cursor packages, they could just exploit security holes to force the adware onto machines for their 30 dollar referrals it was game over. Any 59.99 "Professional Version" fees are just bonus.

1/18/2010 10:05:58 PM

Noen
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Most technically inept people enjoy getting any email, spam or otherwise. Especially if it has anything to do with them. This is that whole part about "you do not represent everyone".

This is the same reason that viruses and malware still spread rapidly through email, because most people don't get enough of it to realize that they should ignore it.

1/18/2010 10:31:26 PM

KaYaK
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Nick Burns

1/18/2010 11:17:00 PM

1337 b4k4
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Quote :
"The technically inept would A) ignore the emails and B) get annoyed by constantly getting spammed by them."


I don't think you know any technically inept people. Most of them are the same people that forward emails to 100 people cause Bill Gates said he'd donate a dollar to the goat boy with no arms, legs or penis to get prosthetics.

1/18/2010 11:34:44 PM

Solinari
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You guys might have a point. Nevertheless, he would annoy me if he was my IT guy.

He is NOT the IT guy I wish I had, per the thread's title.

1/19/2010 12:14:34 AM

quagmire02
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i don't find this especially amusing

am i missing a part of the funny?

1/19/2010 8:25:11 AM

Nighthawk
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^Apparently somebody else didn't find it funny either, because for whatever reason, the blog is now dead. Guess he realized maybe he had too much personal info out there, or somebody else figured this shit out easier than we did.

Jadn was right BTW, it was Ligon Middle. Casorso is in the media center there. Just a quick look at the website can confirm that.

[Edited on January 19, 2010 at 10:25 AM. Reason : ]

1/19/2010 10:25:22 AM

AntecK7
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He deleted the blog

1/19/2010 10:59:15 AM

gs7
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Considering the privacy regulations he violated, he may actually be The IT Guy They No Longer Have.



[Edited on January 19, 2010 at 12:00 PM. Reason : .]

1/19/2010 12:00:17 PM

Boone
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Hijack:

Nighthawk-- do you know if the state has any plans to get NC WISE running on Windows 7 w/o using Opera?

1/19/2010 12:31:22 PM

Prospero
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Quote :
"Considering the privacy regulations he violated, he may actually be The IT Guy They No Longer Have."

1/19/2010 12:49:32 PM

Solinari
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I guess that IRL vindicated my original point.

1/19/2010 1:46:32 PM

Nighthawk
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^^^Hahaha! DPI, are you fucking serious? hahaha. The next update is supposed to FINALLY support fucking IE 7! Don't get your hopes up about an actual Vista/7 supported client.

What gets me is that the whole reason it won't work is the damn Oracle Jinitiator they use is only compatible with XP. Obviously as Opera proves if you can bypass the Jinitiator need (which Opera does) then your fucking golden on any OS. Stupid DPI. Ridiculous that I have to keep my thousands of computers on insecure IE 6 because of them. Fuck that. I have just started upgrading to IE 8 and dropping Opera on the side and giving them a direct shortcut on the desktop to Opera, renaming it NCWise and setting that as the homepage. They never know the difference and think I've set them up a cute little link to make it easier on them.

1/19/2010 10:19:26 PM

Noen
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Don't blame DPI. Blame the shitty Oracle DB Admins at DPI. I was a contractor for DPI to create ncpublicschools.org

The only IT problems I had there was with the Oracle guys. They wanted 75k and 9 months of lead time to create a ONE TABLE database with 250 records in it. I showed DPI how to create it themselves for free with mySQL in ten minutes. Then the Oracle guys informed us that ONLY Oracle and MS SQL Server were approved technologies for databases.

So I wrote a flat SQL parser, and ran it all as a flat file db. The Oracle guys about shit a brick, and it apparently caused all kinds of crybaby shit in their department.

1/20/2010 12:52:20 AM

Solinari
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Quote :
"You obviously don't have a clue about the technical aptitude of teachers, or the social environment that he works in. And we are talking about 100 people. This isn't some giant corporation.

Pull your panties out of your asshole and live a little. While it may be a revelation to you, some people enjoy their work environment AND the people in it. Personal interests shared at work (within reason) promote bonding and trust. Two things critical to working with other people."


LOL in light of this guy getting fired and his blog deleted.

1/20/2010 7:31:35 AM

kiljadn
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We don't know that the guy got fired.





But I can find out.

1/20/2010 6:14:57 PM

Solinari
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Well, he was obviously at least censured. Find out what happened to him... Wonder what the penalty is for sending out a billion dumbass snarky emails.

1/20/2010 7:50:39 PM

Nighthawk
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^^DO IT!

[Edited on January 20, 2010 at 7:55 PM. Reason : ]

1/20/2010 7:55:43 PM

kiljadn
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actually might take a few days, I've got to ask someone better positioned than I to talk to the Ligon Middle people.


the only reason I knew it was Ligon was because the guy specifically mentioned "Mr. Gaudet," who is someone I've heard Ligon teachers mention several times


anyway, I'm on the case, will report back here with the findings

1/21/2010 12:48:52 AM

MaximaDrvr

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having worked for wcpss, the shear number of stupid emails that teachers pass through departments is mind blowing. I probably had 40 emails a day from other teachers/admin/staff of which only 10 were needed any kind of attention.

Being the 'technology' and 'shop' teacher, I can't even begin to explain the number of people that came to me for everything. They would come to me before the IT person, because I could fix things faster. I did everything from building book cases and pencil sharpener stands to fixing vcr/dvd players and microwaves.

1/21/2010 1:42:14 AM

kiljadn
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Well to be fair, if I were an IT guy in a school environment and someone asked me to fix their DVD player, I'd tell them to fuck off to Best Buy.

[Edited on January 26, 2010 at 10:43 AM. Reason : still working on getting some answers, btw]

1/26/2010 10:43:24 AM

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