I should also add "intoxicated"...

Damn I love William Dafoe.


[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 1:24 PM. Reason : I dont like any of these adults!]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 1:26 PM. Reason : That was cool! ...and now I'm controlling some random dude.]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 1:28 PM. Reason : Where's this other bitch at? The game keeps yelling at me through grey screens and noisey shit.]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 1:35 PM. Reason : Fuck this shit...I found the other bitch but with no Idea how to do what the game wanted me to do I.]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 1:36 PM. Reason : fucked it up. while trying to stand and look at the card, I failed, and reverted to Ellen Page.]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 1:41 PM. Reason : Is there a limit to post edits? just tried to chock somebody,thengot a trophy! Also Im eating Ramen]

10/9/2013 1:23:50 PM

Next chapter(?) I don't like this douche I'm with at some Arab party.

Pressing Triangle randomly is the only button that does something other than walking.

Creepy sheikh dude is worse than american douche. My ramen is Chicken with added chives and lemon pepper seasoning. I have no fucking clue how to "find a quiet place" I hate this game.

I'm getting more rum. so far it's like a movie only worse. I'm controlling Ellen Page and walking around or teleporting into other's bodies and shit, but I have to figure out what to do and where to go, with no clues outside of a little glowing dot, sometimes. I have maybe 20 minutes of actual playing and have controlled what would be 4 minutes if they just made it a movie.

With all that said, I played Indigo Prophecy and enjoyed the hell out of it.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 1:55 PM. Reason : Now Im controlling someone as "Aiden" and E.P. is lying to me. "Camera's, I told you to take care of]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 1:57 PM. Reason : them first!" except no the fuck she didn't. This game is bullshit. More rum]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 2:07 PM. Reason : So after disabling the camera that she didnt tell me to disable, Im in the room with NO CLUE what to]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 2:08 PM. Reason : do. HEY GAME DEV.s! WHEN A CHARACTER IN GAME SAYS "You know what to do." NO THE FUCK I DONT!]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 2:12 PM. Reason : I wish she would stop telepathy-ing me to hurry up. You think I enjoy wasting this much time? I]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 2:12 PM. Reason : could be wathing vlogbrothers vids on youtube right now. Instead, Im giving your ass a chance.]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 2:14 PM. Reason : I dont speak Arabic...and that whore just stole my stolen papers.]

10/9/2013 1:51:37 PM

Next(?) Chapter:

Shit, William Dafoe is my dad or something!
Why is this game making me do menial shit that should just be a cutscene? Is there any reason I have to open the car door mydamnself? More Ramen. Texted another friend to tell him to avoid this game.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 2:31 PM. Reason : So my Ramen is Chicken with added Pampered Chef Smokey Barbeque Rub and honey from the farmer's]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 2:32 PM. Reason : market, because I'm classy. Rum is what ever was cheap and I mean cheap.Cheaper than Ron Rico cheap.]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 2:34 PM. Reason : This girl whose party I'm at sounds exactly like Luanna Hill.]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 2:35 PM. Reason : Also, while we're "getting crazy" I'm wondering aimlessly, because I'm unable to find anything meani]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 2:37 PM. Reason : ngful to do. Oh! I found music! And Luanna showed up with beer! that she hid under her bed...]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 2:41 PM. Reason : E.P. is wearing a cute dress though. Although I never dance...WTF?! I said refuse the dance!]

10/9/2013 2:23:09 PM

This dude is day drinking like it's his damn job.

Much respect sir!

10/9/2013 2:29:48 PM

I too approve of this. I can only imagine how disorienting the nonlinear vignette story progression is while intoxicated.

Do tell.

10/9/2013 2:30:42 PM

Day drinking at it's finest.

You're really going to be pissed later

^^^ You get to the part with the rapey dude yet?

YEA, IT'S A SPOILER. WANNA FIGHT ABOUT IT?

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 2:39 PM. Reason : ]

10/9/2013 2:32:23 PM

The Londoner? SAw that ass grab coming.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 2:45 PM. Reason : What kind of High School(?) girl gives her friend a thong? or a rare book...]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 2:47 PM. Reason : Really, they locked her in the closet under the stairs? And she's just gonna cry about it?]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 2:47 PM. Reason : More rum, because I cant stand to hear crying.]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 2:53 PM. Reason : I burned the effin house down!, but now I go further back in time...]

10/9/2013 2:41:59 PM

^ yep

Gotta protect my one true love, Ellen Page, though. If I could chop that dick off, I would.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 2:44 PM. Reason : ]

10/9/2013 2:44:01 PM

Next Chapter

So he's not my dad. He's my Shrink. And this fucking game made me walk two fucking feet and sit in a chair. Seriously? Do that for me.

I fucked up William's moniter, haha.

OK, so clearly this dude is a psychiatrist of some sort, why was his brain on the white incorrectly and incompletely labeled?

Next chapter.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 2:59 PM. Reason : I have never seen jeans pre-shredded that bad.]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 3:01 PM. Reason : This CIA training scene is bullshit. at the end of the monkey bars, what does that graphic mean?]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 3:02 PM. Reason : Really, Sixaxis? What game makes you drop your controller on the Vertical axis? It's Gimmicky at abs]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 3:03 PM. Reason : olute best.]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 3:08 PM. Reason : This game just made me say "For fucking seriously?" out loud. Why on earth would it make you complet]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 3:09 PM. Reason : e the formula on the character's written exam, but simply by following commands with the right stick]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 3:09 PM. Reason : ? I dont k ow why I'm still playing at this point, I really dont.]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 3:13 PM. Reason : More Rum. It is Ron Llave Supremo, and it cost 11.75 for a handle. Yes, a handle, not a fifth.]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 3:16 PM. Reason : The CIA Trainer told Ellen Page to "Keep your fat ass down!" Clearly this man has never seen a Karda]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 3:16 PM. Reason : shian.]

10/9/2013 2:58:56 PM

lmao

JESUS, IT'S CALLED A MONTAGE. THIS IS STILL THE 80S

hahaha, I just found this for you: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL9MoLfABC7y79x7Hxpr3_OVR42DCpd_VG

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 3:14 PM. Reason : ]

10/9/2013 3:01:37 PM

Why would the train start moving if the policemans were there? Wouldn't they have been all like "Dont go anywhere?
And More Sixaxis, and More rum, and a GF on her way home...

So now I'm walking through the woods, again completley randomly, no sense of direction.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 3:45 PM. Reason : .]

Oh shit! Dawgs! and policemans!

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 3:46 PM. Reason : .]

Oh damn, they caught me climbing the rock wall. Alcohol is a drug people. It will diminish you reaction time.

C'Mon game, I drunk. Dont punish me for not pushing "x" fast enough. I want to get out of the river, I really do.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 3:48 PM. Reason : .]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 3:52 PM. Reason : putting dinner on the stove. brb.]

10/9/2013 3:36:38 PM

I was pushing the shit out of x and those ass fuckers still failed me

I was PISSED

Also, Swoakley is now the worst person on my list

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 4:22 PM. Reason : ]

10/9/2013 4:22:03 PM

So, the story would continue the same either way? interesting. I watched Heavy Rain as a youtube movie, and wondered how much I might miss, or how different I couldve played it. Anyway, GF is making some phone calls about the new apartment, so I cant play ATM.

10/9/2013 4:24:21 PM

Yea, sadly Im' pretty sure the only thing that changes is the ending.

I wish some random choices you make during the story would change change the possible endings.

Kind of hard to do the heavy rain dying shit when you're only playing one character

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 4:30 PM. Reason : ]

10/9/2013 4:28:51 PM

So jaZon, have you already played through Beyond? No worries about spoilers. The Thread is already marked for them and I dont care.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 4:32 PM. Reason : in the habit]

10/9/2013 4:30:44 PM

Nah, I got to the condenser shit that pretty much pissed me off before i went to bed\

I'm still sticking by my aiden prediction though

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 4:34 PM. Reason : ]

10/9/2013 4:33:08 PM

So whats your prediction?

Also, I don't know anything about "condenser shit."

Aside from that, I just stole the HP motercycle,a nd I am annoyed that 1)I cant crash it, and 2)the helicopter showed up immediately

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 4:45 PM. Reason : .]

Oh damn, Aiden got some for real power to bust all through the SWAT barrier.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 4:51 PM. Reason : .]

Im pretty sure that snipers dont use laser sights...

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 4:53 PM. Reason : .]

So Im the theatre or some shit, and EP is yelling "Help me Aiden!" Cept I dont see any glowy dots...

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 5:03 PM. Reason : why didnt they just make this a movie?]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 5:03 PM. Reason : More Rum, and the next stage of dinner.]

EP:"Help me for God's sakes" Maybe she could at least run up the fucking stair well instead of hunkering dow in front of the damn double doors. Isn't this bit after the CIA process? maybe I'm a bit out of sync as someone foreshadowed earlier...

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 5:12 PM. Reason : .]

10/9/2013 4:44:06 PM

I think the condenser is next

And I think Aiden is her dead brother.

Pretty much only basing that on how David Cage said he got the idea due to the death of a loved one or something like that

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 4:55 PM. Reason : ]

10/9/2013 4:53:49 PM

So the bitch ass SWAT dudes just threw a gas granade threw the window, but there were no glowy dots I could find, am I stupid, or did that also happen to you?

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 5:22 PM. Reason : .]

10/9/2013 5:21:42 PM

i think i had gas grenades in the demo, but not this time

i dunno? maybe you should kill people faster

10/9/2013 5:27:30 PM

So now I'm like 8y/o and I get to walk around my house! My character meanwhile looks alomost as bored as I feel!

Oh boy I get to look into the mirror, wiht two button presses!!1!

10/9/2013 6:02:53 PM

hahahahahaha

this thread has made my day

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 6:04 PM. Reason : ]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 6:07 PM. Reason : This is how I feel while playing GTA5 half the time]

10/9/2013 6:04:43 PM

And now I cant find the fucking garage to get a can of oil for my mom. bullshit bullshit bullshit.
fuck this "game"

For fucking really? my mom just told me that the "yard's the other way honey" when I tried to walk out the front door. If you wont let me go out the door, then dont let me open the motherfucker! It isnt like that added a damn thing to the gameplay experience. Especially since it was my mother that TOLD me to go outside!!!

While I typed that paragraph, my GF played, and is already annoyed at this stupid fucking game.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 6:41 PM. Reason : .]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 6:42 PM. Reason : My dad is sorta a dick...]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 6:47 PM. Reason : More rum. We had tostadas for dinner. They're awesome; for you non cultural types--google it.]

Was it necessary for me to hold two buttons to hold my damn bunny rabbit? Why isnt that a continuous cutscene??

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 6:55 PM. Reason : .]

10/9/2013 6:33:39 PM

oh man, find that shit - it's pretty epic once you get in there

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 6:35 PM. Reason : for like 10 seconds]

hahahaha, i tried to go out the front, too and said cunt a few times when the bitch told me not to go out

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 6:44 PM. Reason : ]

wait until you find out why her father is a piece of shit

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 6:45 PM. Reason : ]

10/9/2013 6:34:29 PM

Why she got scratches on her head? Why do I want to rewind this game so often?

S just got R

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 7:07 PM. Reason : "Condenser shit"]

Why can't EP walk a bit faster?

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 7:10 PM. Reason : ?]

Oh no! Sixaxis again! oh yeah a dead body too, I guess thats traumatic to some people.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 7:14 PM. Reason : more rum]

So, the getting memories from dead people is kinda cool, but at the same time, idk why but it feels kinda FF7 to me.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 7:23 PM. Reason : .]

Got that fire extinguisher...P.A.S.S. bitch. P.A.S.S.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 7:33 PM. Reason : P.A.S.S.]

10/9/2013 7:04:17 PM

i'm about to do the homeless thing and listen to ellen page sing beck over and over and over and over

10/9/2013 7:17:18 PM

10/9/2013 7:32:15 PM

So how excatly did it get to be so cold? Why cant I find the passcode? Why didnt I have the option to search the bodies before hand? Why are these even questions? More rum.

Why are some boidies worth searching and others not? This is a terrible interactive medium for anyone who thinks things through and/or has played good games before.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 8:02 PM. Reason : .]

Seriously, why is it cold? Did I miss something?

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 8:04 PM. Reason : I have no idea.]

That looks like a vagina. Just saying, that can't be a coincidence. Condenser, killing scientists, cold basement.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 8:24 PM. Reason : .]

10/9/2013 8:00:25 PM

ok, going to finally start playing - i'll post my bitching in here

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 9:18 PM. Reason : mother fucking bullshit didn't save my invert y axis]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 9:21 PM. Reason : oh, she's having fucking premonitions now?]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 9:22 PM. Reason : this still isn't changing my overtly creepy and downright unhealthy obsession with ellen page]

i hate having the choice to answer like i want to (for the sake of finding shit out) and how i think I should (not that it fucking matters.)

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 9:30 PM. Reason : ]

10/9/2013 9:14:24 PM

fucking hell, now i have to go back and see what slashing her wrist is like

Quote :

"I burned the effin house down!, but now I go further back in time"

hahahha, i just read that. can you actually burn the fucker down?

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 9:45 PM. Reason : ]

this homeless dude sees me crying and wanting to die and just busts in with "we got nothing to eat. gotta do something about it."

fucking thanks for getting my hopes about life up, prick

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 9:47 PM. Reason : ]

10/9/2013 9:43:54 PM

^No, I knocked out all the kids but one, then lit the drapes on fire with the candle. Outside, all the kids were fine, and the house was there...it was drunken dream fulfillment.

Walked around this homeless camp for, what, 15 minutes, then she looks towards what did NOT look like an exit an says "Come on, lets go." Only to find a very nice kitchen knife stuck in a tire?

Like one of those homeless fuckers wouldn'tve had that shit in their area. No I get to sit and cry while I try to make a decision about whether or not to cut my fucking wrist! Across the street at that! Fucking baby.

Sorry jaZon, maybe it'll change later, but for now this "game" is curing my EP obsession.

Also, I still don't know why the "Dead Scientists Basement" was frozen.

In my attempt to find the answer to the above question, I found this review:
http://www.joystiq.com/2013/10/08/beyond-two-souls-review-bc07eda2/

Spot on.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 9:49 PM. Reason : .]

10/9/2013 9:47:07 PM

I refuse to read that anti ellen page propaganda!

dammit, i wish i had seen the candle

someone needs to hack this thing and make those dick riders die

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 9:51 PM. Reason : ]

god dammit, i'm homeless, why can't i cross the street

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 9:54 PM. Reason : ]

oh great, i can now that i'm at some fucking cross walk or something

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 9:56 PM. Reason : ]

10/9/2013 9:48:16 PM

Well, I wasnt able to knock down the last kid, so maybe if you can they do die, but I doubt it.

You cant even cut her wrist with the $85 kitchen knife in the homeless camp. Aiden knocks it out of her hand.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 9:57 PM. Reason : Or swan dive into traffic.]

Ohshit, she's right. It is Willem Dafoe.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 10:07 PM. Reason : I never knew that.]

10/9/2013 9:55:47 PM

Hey man, when you recieve a miyabi kaizen as a gift, you can't just pawn it for smack money

yea, i googled that

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 9:58 PM. Reason : ]

nice, an out of style rapist wants me to blow him

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 9:59 PM. Reason : ]

fuck yea, playing guitar with gloves on

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 9:59 PM. Reason : ]

really, gotta tune the guitar? no wonder the homeless dude didn't make any money

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 10:00 PM. Reason : ]

10/9/2013 9:57:40 PM

Willem

Willem Dafoe

10/9/2013 10:05:17 PM

this dude better buy 100 pack of ramen with that money i just gave him

god damn, she just laid that dude out

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 10:07 PM. Reason : ]

shitty god damn controls made me fuck that fight all up

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 10:09 PM. Reason : ]

10/9/2013 10:06:06 PM

willem Dafoe

10/9/2013 10:07:30 PM

Member's Only jacket just about raped me.

"I cant take that money Aiden, I'm no theif." At the ATM. Moments after she takes the money from the newspaper machine.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 10:13 PM. Reason : .]

Channeled Stan's dead wife. no more crying. More rum for me.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 10:25 PM. Reason : .]

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 10:26 PM. Reason : Oh fuck! Tuesday's having her baby!]

10/9/2013 10:08:46 PM

oh sweet irony - "your new home home is here" just above the abandoned building

those are some big ass cans of tuna...and albacore at that - RIDING HIGH

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 10:14 PM. Reason : ]


hahaha, channeled a dead chick and the heroin dude is all like "fuck, this must be some good shit"

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 10:18 PM. Reason : ]

oh fuck, rapey guy didn't give me the option to get raped

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 10:20 PM. Reason : ]

^ oh you prick, i missed the newspaper machine - I'M MISSING EVERYTHING

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 10:21 PM. Reason : ]

10/9/2013 10:10:32 PM

My husband and I discussed this when he was playing the demo. I was searching for a movie of his I watched on Netflix that was absurdly terrible and grotesque but I couldn't remember the name. So I searched his name and he told me I spelled William wrong. He, too, did not know his name was not William.

10/9/2013 10:25:35 PM

lol

10/9/2013 10:29:15 PM

My husband put this on his Christmas list, should he revise or is it worth a play through?

10/9/2013 10:32:23 PM

YOU WILL BUY IT FOR HIM RIGHT NOW

10/9/2013 10:33:08 PM

Its worth the two bucks I paid to play it tonight for sure. Even with the frustrations I had earlier. Fuck if I'd pay $60 though.

I just took off Tuesday's pants.

From what I've read, it's so short, you could just get a Redbox rental, get some popcorn and watch him play it over a weekend. If he likes it then the $2-4 spent that way is basically nothing. If he doesn't, the you saved $56+

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 10:37 PM. Reason : .]

Newborn babies do NOT FUCKInG LOOK LIKE THAT!!

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 10:41 PM. Reason : Little bitch is all pink and dry...]

10/9/2013 10:35:06 PM

Oh. OK then. But actually I think his mommy is going to buy it.

10/9/2013 10:35:43 PM

10/9/2013 10:35:54 PM

I just bought him GTAV! Games are expensive.

I will try to convince him to rent it so we can get other games for Christmas.

[Edited on October 9, 2013 at 10:39 PM. Reason : ]

10/9/2013 10:38:03 PM

does he call his mom "mommy"

10/9/2013 10:38:48 PM

No. I call mine mommy sometimes though. Not when I'm talking to her but when talking about her.

10/9/2013 10:39:51 PM

well that's cool

also, this pregnant chick is totally giving birth

i took a dump a few weeks ago that was more painful that she's acting

10/9/2013 10:41:41 PM