One of my close friends since college called today and is in a bind, asking to borrow $2K.

This is against my better judgement but I'd hope he'd do the same for me if I had an emergency. He has a job as an accountant for a big 4 accounting firm (thus knows he has income) and supposedly going to be able to return a majority of the money after he sells his second car.

Thoughts on this, not sure if I'm comfortable doing this although i'm fairly confident he'd pay me back?

I figure if I could get some sort of collateral and promissory note it could limit my liability. Seems like a small claims suit and/or judge judy scenario in the making.

[Edited on December 3, 2013 at 11:37 AM. Reason : a]

12/3/2013 11:35:46 AM

bad idea

12/3/2013 11:38:38 AM

Close friend, yes. Occasional friend...no.

12/3/2013 11:44:34 AM

if you see yourself ever resorting to small claims court to get your money back, you're probably not good enough friends to loan him 2k

[Edited on December 3, 2013 at 11:47 AM. Reason : v basically what he said]

12/3/2013 11:46:03 AM

i'm having trouble understanding a person with a real job salary not being able to come up with $2k in short time unless they were already in really really bad shape financially, and in that case I wouldn't expect to see the money. if you want to help him out, you should look at it as a gift and be happy if you are paid back but should not expect it.

12/3/2013 11:46:09 AM

Someone once told me, never loan a friend money and expect to get paid back.

You say he has a job and an income, so why does he need to borrow additional money? I know the whole "do unto others as you would have others do unto you" principle, but this situation is always sensitive because more often than not it results in a loss of money AND friendship.

If you aren't feeling good about the situation, i'd avoid it. If he's actually a good friend, he should respect your decision not to loan the money.

12/3/2013 11:46:35 AM

Quote :

"i'm having trouble understanding a person with a real job salary not being able to come up with $2k in short time unless they were already in really really bad shape financially, and in that case I wouldn't expect to see the money. if you want to help him out, you should look at it as a gift and be happy if you are paid back but should not expect it."

agreed completely here.

12/3/2013 11:48:34 AM

I loaned a really good friend $10k about 5 years ago so he could start up his own business. He started making payments right away, but I saw that he was struggling and told him to make the payments when he could. He went about 4 years without making any payments (I knew he was still scraping by, so I never said anything). Last year he paid me back $5k and in the next month or so he's going to write me a $10k check "for interest." He's doing really well now and can afford it and then some.

Deep down I always thought I was going to eventually get the money back because I had faith in this guy's business. But when it went years with him still scraping by, I was still OKAY with possibly n ot getting the money back (even though I still thought it was going to happen).

The part I regret was telling my fiancee (and now wife) that I loaned this guy the money. Don't think she would have allowed it had we been together at the time.

So basically, I echo these sentiments:

Quote :

"Someone once told me, never loan a friend money and expect to get paid back. "

and

Quote :

"if you see yourself ever resorting to small claims court to get your money back, you're probably not good enough friends to loan him 2k "

Here's the thread I started on this back in the day:

message_topic.aspx?topic=529694

12/3/2013 11:57:18 AM

What kind of an accountant at a big firm doesn't have liquid 2K? That's really really weird.

12/3/2013 12:02:37 PM

Quote :

"bad idea"

12/3/2013 12:09:46 PM

you are not a bank. don't loan money.

unless you don't care to ever see it.

12/3/2013 12:48:03 PM

this dude is involved in something shady

12/3/2013 12:57:52 PM

what's the bind?

12/3/2013 1:19:09 PM

he should give the second car as collateral lol

12/3/2013 1:20:22 PM

Quote :

"Close friend, yes. Occasional friend...no."

12/3/2013 1:22:52 PM

who fucked up?

12/3/2013 1:23:47 PM

I wouldn't give a friend or family member money unless I was perfectly okay with it never coming back. I have done this, and I have had some repayed and some not. One non-payment resulted in my sister realizing how much of a sleazeball that guy was, and I still consider that money very well spent.

12/3/2013 1:27:34 PM

I've got a friend of 20+ years and three family members for whom I'd drain my savings, sell my stuff, and even take extra jobs to help their cause. But, seeing as I'm not some wealthy benefactor, everybody else can fuck off.

12/3/2013 1:38:01 PM

jbrick - you should update your thread with updates and details. it's a pretty interesting story and one with a happy ending

12/3/2013 3:14:42 PM

Agree with the sentiments of "close friend yes, occasional friend no" and "you need to be okay with never getting it back, consider it a gift."

If it's a close friend who's been there for you, and you can afford it without any personal discomfort, then it might be the right thing to do. (I wonder how someone who should have plenty of disposable income would end up urgently needing $2k, but that's really none of my business and I don't know his circumstances.) But you have to give and forget--if you stay on his back about it, or really make any sort of comments at all, it will strain and possibly kill the friendship.

12/3/2013 3:19:10 PM

Quote :

"Someone once told me, never loan a friend money and expect to get paid back."

^ THIS

I'm assuming this friend has exhausted all other resources...family, 401k, etc?

12/3/2013 3:27:39 PM

^ agreed. If you "loan" a friend money, you need to go ahead and consider it a gift.

This is kind of ironic, because just yesterday a friend of mine called me asking if he could "lease" one of my cars. He just lost his job and his company took back their car, which was his only car.

I told him that I feel bad for him, but he should have never relied on his company car as his only mode of transportation. I also told him that while yes, I have multiple vehicles, I am not willing to take the insurance risk of him driving one of them. Then I told him to spend the money he would pay me to "lease" one of my vehicles on cab fare.

It's tough to tell your friends no, but sometimes you have to.

[Edited on December 3, 2013 at 3:50 PM. Reason : a]

12/3/2013 3:48:57 PM

HUR needs to come in here with some more details. Why is this guy needing $2K if he has a real job? Is it for something unexpected like medical bills or family issues or is he just a cocaine addict?

12/3/2013 4:15:30 PM

Whats the money for?

12/3/2013 5:12:35 PM

No. Either it's an amount you could easily get on a card with zero intro interest, or it's too much for me to give away. I'd wonder why the guy had all his cards maxed out if he supposedly had a good job.

12/3/2013 5:15:58 PM

title loan, payday advance, big sky or what ever



[Edited on December 3, 2013 at 5:18 PM. Reason : .]

12/3/2013 5:17:33 PM

uh, why isn't this guy just taking a personal loan, 401k loan, or not paying his credit card this month?

I'm assuming this guy gets paid bi-weekly so just tell him to wait until he gets paid this week or next and leave you out of it...

12/3/2013 5:28:24 PM

^ yeah.

and:

Quote :

"i'm having trouble understanding a person with a real job salary not being able to come up with $2k in short time unless they were already in really really bad shape financially, and in that case I wouldn't expect to see the money. if you want to help him out, you should look at it as a gift and be happy if you are paid back but should not expect it. "

yeah.

Quote :

"What kind of an accountant at a big firm doesn't have liquid 2K? That's really really weird."

yeah.

a plumber or garbageman or waitress ought to have 2k liquid.

12/3/2013 5:57:29 PM

if a good friend needed the money and i had it to spare, i would make it a gift so there would be no tension on paying it back.

12/3/2013 6:08:07 PM

I've had a similar situation with a GF. I expected 50% of the money back… and I've gotten about 70% back as of now. (we're still together, but she hasn't made her payments as we originally agreed… but she's paying me back when she can) But when I "loaned" her the money, I accepted that I may not have seen any of it again.

If it's someone who's going to be in your wedding, loan him the $$$ (or figure out some way for their to be collateral on the loan… IE whatever he's buying goes in your name) and don't expect full payment in return. If it's not, then I'd ask how else you could help him out.

12/3/2013 8:30:20 PM

Quote :

"If it's someone who's going to be in your wedding, loan him the $$$"

Fuck that, you're casting the net wayyyyy too wide.

12/3/2013 9:23:04 PM

Whenever my friends/relatives ask to borrow money, I say I don't have it - then I'll come back and say well I might can loan them half of the money. I'll call them back in a few days and tell them come get the money.

12/3/2013 9:50:49 PM

apparently what happened is he charged $2K of personal expenses to his company credit card. Now due to change in corporate policy they are taking away his corporate card and doesn't have the cash to pay the balance before his company discovers what he's been doing....

12/3/2013 9:51:59 PM

Oh shit he better take out a personal loan then. But at least he was honest with you.

12/3/2013 9:53:44 PM

Agreeing with everyone else, do it but dont expect it back. Though it sounds like in this situation he's already been caught or is about to have the hammer come down on him and might not have a job much longer. I would already be under the assumption only a dumbass or an arrogant jackass would pull something like that with a company card.

12/4/2013 1:30:14 AM

And that's not even close to the whole story. How is he so hard up for credit that he's using his corporate card for 2k of personal expenses? I mean, if he has a ton of student loans and is leading an unwise lifestyle, then I could see the debt piling up pretty bad...but that's a lifestyle issue, not a "jam." And it's certainly not worthy of a loan.

He needs to do what everybody else does--sell his stuff quickly for whatever he can get for it. And he sounds like the kind of guy who has plenty of stuff to sell.

I got fifty on the TV.

12/4/2013 8:12:38 AM

Quote :

"And that's not even close to the whole story. How is he so hard up for credit that he's using his corporate card for 2k of personal expenses? I mean, if he has a ton of student loans and is leading an unwise lifestyle, then I could see the debt piling up pretty bad...but that's a lifestyle issue, not a "jam." And it's certainly not worthy of a loan."

12/4/2013 8:52:51 AM

what company allows you to make $2k of personal charges on a corporate card?

12/4/2013 8:54:24 AM

yeah after learning that the answer is def a "N0"

[insert picture of No Guy here]

12/4/2013 9:09:28 AM

Quote :

"what company allows you to make $2k of personal charges on a corporate card?"

They don't... that seems to be the problem haha

12/4/2013 9:15:37 AM

kovering korporate korruption

i see

12/4/2013 9:58:02 AM

After knowing that back story I would most definitely not be lending that dude money. Good Call.

12/4/2013 10:01:15 AM

^^ he was implying that it was because of a "change in policy", but really it sounds like he just got caught and doesn't want to get fired and potentially be criminally prosecuted. i can't imagine anyone's policy every allowing that.

12/4/2013 10:01:45 AM

Maybe the change in policy entails a more detailed itemization of purchases instead of just paying the bill for general groups of purchases without receipts or something like that.

[Edited on December 4, 2013 at 10:04 AM. Reason : /]

12/4/2013 10:03:43 AM

I think the change in policy is them taking away the card. The problem is he has been using it for personal expenses and obviously they let him keep track of it, which was a boneheaded move on their part. Now if he doesnt pay the balance off before they take the card back they are gonna wonder why there is 2k of shit on it and then he is gonna get fired.

12/4/2013 10:19:40 AM

I loaned my cousin $500 about a year ago and have yet to see a penny of it. He texted me on Black Friday and told me he was standing in line to buy the new xBox. A few months ago he posted a picture on Facebook of the new 3D TV he had just bought. I guess my repayment is on the back burner.

12/4/2013 10:22:09 AM

^Yep, I just don't get that. I was in a similar situation. I know that if whatever happened and I had to borrow money from a friend or family member, it would be my top priority to pay them back. I'd stop all unnecessary purchases, stop eating out, buy only the cheapest of beer, eat ramen noodles a few times a week... i would hate knowing that i owed someone money and try to pay them back as quickly as possible.

12/4/2013 10:33:35 AM

^ exactly. I had to borrow $1400 from my sister because I blew the engine out in my car and had just started a new job. My first 2 paychecks went directly to her, and I kept back just enough for gas and ramen noodle.

12/4/2013 10:41:56 AM

The guy I lent money to back in the day has a fairly "lavish" lifestyle. He doesn't buy fancy cars and go on jet-setting trips...but he wears nice clothes, goes out a lot, and takes a fair amount of weekend trips. About halfway into the 4-year stint of him not making payments on our loan we sat down and had lunch and I kind of laid it out for him. While I was scraping by with starting my own business...he was going to every Clemson home game, going out 3-4 nights a week, taking weekend trips with his girl to Atlanta and Boston, etc.

I understood that is and has always been his lifestyle. I'd be living my life the same way whether or not he had paid me back...so it wasn't one of those "I could be financially stable if you would pay me back!" type of things. I was still stable...I just wanted to remind him that he still owed me money and he could probably be cutting back on some things and work on paying me back a little better. He got the message, we were cool...and then he settled a decent sized case and cut me a $5k check.

It doesn't hurt to remind someone they owe you money and you can do it in a way that doesn't seem like, "fuck you, pay me."

12/4/2013 10:47:07 AM

Quote :

"I loaned my cousin $500 about a year ago and have yet to see a penny of it. He texted me on Black Friday and told me he was standing in line to buy the new xBox. A few months ago he posted a picture on Facebook of the new 3D TV he had just bought. I guess my repayment is on the back burner."

I hate that. I paid a girl's mortgage a couple years ago and got similar treatment. She was already working a new job, but her first paycheck was 2 weeks away. It seemed reasonable for me to offer to help her since she really was working a new job. She was crying and thanking me when she got the cash, but it was excuse after excuse when it came time to pay it back. In the end I recouped probably 75% of the money in cash and paid her way too much to do a pretty bad job of cleaning my home a few times. I don't regret it because I helped a friend avoid some pretty serious issues over a short term problem (she was going to have to dispose of most of her things, disrupt her kids' lives, and move back in with her parents.) I just wish she had taken the repayment seriously. I won't make that mistake with her again, but I wouldn't take it out on my other friends who may find themselves in need.

[Edited on December 4, 2013 at 11:55 AM. Reason : l]

12/4/2013 11:43:00 AM