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 Message Boards » » In Memorandum: TWW Secret Santa Page [1] 2, Next  
bbehe
Burn it all down.
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Post your favorite secret santa gifts (either sent or received) or memories here

I'll start, my favorite memory was when Banjoman said he got me a gift, but then didn't.

12/2/2019 6:25:30 PM

justinh524
Sprots Talk Mod
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That is also my favorite memory

12/2/2019 6:37:12 PM

BanjoMan
All American
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I am not a liar. I got you gift and mailed it with DHL. I got you a chocolate santa and some other goodies from Switzerland. I spent around 40 bucks in total. It must have gotten lost in the mail because I addressed it using my writing, and Germans write their 1's and 7's different from us. Was there a one or seven in your address?

I have stuck to the same story since this happened, because that is the truth. I bought you something very nice and it got lost in the mail. For that I am sorry, but I definitely didn't scam you.

12/2/2019 6:44:10 PM

justinh524
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I also bought you something really nice bbehe, THAT DANG MAILMAN STOLE IT

12/2/2019 6:59:27 PM

BanjoMan
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for the record, I just looked it up and there were multiple 1s and 7s in your address. Looking back on it, I made a mistake by not printing out the addresses myself, but I think that this is prolly the reason why the packages got lost.

My son still lives in Germany, and I have to be very careful about how I write the addresses or else he just wont get it. The way that Germans write a one looks like a seven to Americans, and vice versa. This is well known, you can google it.

I swear to you that I did get you something, and it got lost due to me handwriting the address.

12/2/2019 6:59:52 PM

NeuseRvrRat
hello Mr. NSA!
35376 Posts
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I enjoyed making the gifts I fabricated/welded for folks. I was happy with how they turned out. Hope they're bringing joy to the recipients.

12/2/2019 9:45:03 PM

bbehe
Burn it all down.
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^ Did you make the welded thing of my daughter's name? If so, we absolutely love it

12/2/2019 10:03:15 PM

NeuseRvrRat
hello Mr. NSA!
35376 Posts
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yeah

12/2/2019 10:04:10 PM

NeuseRvrRat
hello Mr. NSA!
35376 Posts
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here it is on my welding table: https://photos.app.goo.gl/PQ9zBkNLqvNaZkzT6

all the letters were from plain old square stock. made the bends with one of those harbor freight benders.

[Edited on December 2, 2019 at 10:09 PM. Reason : adsf]

12/2/2019 10:07:44 PM

justinh524
Sprots Talk Mod
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It's cool that both you and banjoman fabricated gifts for bbehe

12/2/2019 11:31:59 PM

dustm
All American
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Yes 911 I would like to report a murder

12/3/2019 12:19:07 AM

FroshKiller
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BanjoMan said:
Quote :
"It must have gotten lost in the mail because I addressed it using my writing, and Germans write their 1's and 7's different from us."


It must be absolutely fucking fascinating to live in your dumb world.

Do you reckon that ze Germans just...don't receive mail from anywhere else on the planet from people who may not write their ones and sevens differently from ze German way? And that your package, which I am not at all convinced ever existed, was the first artifact bearing the unfamiliar glyphs that a series of German delivery worker and mail carriers had seen? And that somehow, despite the almost certain presence of other non-numeric address data that would have at least gotten the package to the right region, they fucked up and lost it in the last leg of its journey, finally flummoxed by your arcane renditions of those digits?

12/3/2019 6:23:20 AM

aaronburro
Sup, B
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So, did bbehe live in Germany when this alleged package was mailed? Cause I'm trying to figure out why "Germans write 1s and 7s differently" would matter

12/3/2019 8:04:19 AM

FroshKiller
All American
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come on, man, context clues

do the reading, it's all in the thread

don't be a b*nj*m*n

12/3/2019 8:28:40 AM

BettrOffDead
All American
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>.<

12/3/2019 8:33:45 AM

justinh524
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Germans couldn't read the 1's and 7's, so they didn't know the package was supposed to go to the US and instead they mailed it to the moon.

12/3/2019 11:28:25 AM

StTexan
Suggestions???
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gnsp

12/3/2019 11:32:39 AM

UJustWait84
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^^ it probably went somewhere in the United Arab Emirates. It's a well-known fact that things get mailed to the UAE all the time instead of USA.

[Edited on December 3, 2019 at 12:28 PM. Reason : lettuce see receipts, Banjoman]

12/3/2019 12:26:06 PM

A Tanzarian
drip drip boom
10990 Posts
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Quote :
"It's cool that both you and banjoman fabricated gifts for bbehe"


hahaha

breathe

hahahahaha

12/3/2019 12:44:22 PM

dtownral
Suspended
26632 Posts
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Quote :
"It's cool that both you and banjoman fabricated gifts for bbehe"


fantastic

12/3/2019 12:45:08 PM

BanjoMan
All American
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Quote :
"Do you reckon that ze Germans just...don't receive mail from anywhere else on the planet from people who may not write their ones and sevens differently from ze German way? And that your package, which I am not at all convinced ever existed, was the first artifact bearing the unfamiliar glyphs that a series of German delivery worker and mail carriers had seen? And that somehow, despite the almost certain presence of other non-numeric address data that would have at least gotten the package to the right region, they fucked up and lost it in the last leg of its journey, finally flummoxed by your arcane renditions of those digits?"



Quote :
"So, did bbehe live in Germany when this alleged package was mailed? Cause I'm trying to figure out why "Germans write 1s and 7s differently" would matter"


good question, allow me to clarify. I prolly wrote his American address using the german system for 1 and 7 because I had been living there for a while and had gotten use to it. Thus, the one wound up looking like a seven to americans. It's the only thing that I can think of, and mail does get mixed up to this mix up. It's actually a pretty big problem for expats living in Germany and vice versa. The Germans think that our one is just a dash, and we think that their one is a seven.

https://german.stackexchange.com/questions/11027/how-different-is-german-handwriting-from-americans

I am just saying that it is a possibility. I have gone to the post office here and shipped something to my son, and they got very confused because I was still using the german system. For example, they typed in the area code for Essen (45130) incorrectly as 45730. This has happened to me recently as I have gotten use to writing my numbers and dates using their system, which is why I think that it is a possible explanation for why my package never made it.



[Edited on December 3, 2019 at 1:17 PM. Reason : k]

12/3/2019 1:07:46 PM

daaave
Suspended
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dawg if that happened it sucks, but you could/should have rectified it by sending another gift

Quote :
"It's cool that both you and banjoman fabricated gifts for bbehe"


lmao

12/3/2019 1:16:21 PM

justinh524
Sprots Talk Mod
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Always cross your sevens. Then there is no problem.

[Edited on December 3, 2019 at 1:19 PM. Reason : Also, don't write your ones like a moron. Yes I'm calling all Germans morons.]

12/3/2019 1:18:22 PM

BanjoMan
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^ Well, when it was brought to my attention I advised the parties involved that I had shipped it a bit late, and that it would be nice if people would be a bit patient and wait on it, since it was coming from over seas during Christmas time. I honestly was just waiting on it to show up, and then people were very quick to jump on the " I am a liar" train at which point I got pretty pissed off. I was given an option to make a donation of something on line, but I couldn't do this because I had no credit cards or pay pals. Then, it became more important for people to just ridicule me instead of allowing me to wait and ship another package. So, I was already deemed guilty and still am to this day.

Quote :
"Always cross your sevens. Then there is no problem.
"


It is not the seven that is problematic, just check the link, it is a one in the german system that looks like a seven to us.

[Edited on December 3, 2019 at 1:25 PM. Reason : a]

12/3/2019 1:20:56 PM

EMCE
balls deep
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^^^ that sounds like a completely contrived, ad-hoc, poorly thought out explanation.

Personally, I'm more inclined to believe you're just a piece of shit that fucked up someone else's Christmas because you didn't send a gift. And then instead of resending a gift when you realized your folly, you doubled down on being a scroteface. It's also not clear whether you donated to the Air Force as bbehe requested as a way to make up for your goofy ass.

Santa dont like ugly, BanjoMan, and one day he's going to wash his dick off in ya mouf.

[Edited on December 3, 2019 at 1:28 PM. Reason : H]

12/3/2019 1:28:12 PM

BanjoMan
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As stated, I had no means to make a donation without a credit card or paypal. I did offer to send something else, though.

It's frustrating that I had explained the same details throughout this entire thing, and people still insist on saying that I lied about it... just because.

Yes, I did get him a gift from CH.

Yes, I did ship it a couple of days later than I should have.

Yes, it is apparent that it never showed up.

Yes, I stuck to my guns and said please wait because I sent it.

Yes, TWW went all on my ass and I was deemed guilty. Again, I am not excusing culpability here because I did not pay for tracking and insurance, and that would have made all of this go away. However, I have had multiple problems upon arriving back to the US and sending things to Germany due to their writing system, or more importantly, me still using their writing system and confusing postal workers.

12/3/2019 1:38:47 PM

EMCE
balls deep
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Is this where you start blaming your SS shortcomings on your ex-wife again?

12/3/2019 1:42:18 PM

StTexan
Suggestions???
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He probably fabricated that too

12/3/2019 1:43:09 PM

EMCE
balls deep
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12/3/2019 1:45:45 PM

BanjoMan
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Quote :
"Is this where you start blaming your SS shortcomings on your ex-wife again?"


She got knocked up by a german dude and just had another kid. She kept my son there in Germany because I signed a custody agreement with her stating that I could have 50% custody as long as I lived in Germany.

Since coming back to the US, she has completely broken off contact with me and is currently filing papers that would eventually allow her new baby daddy to effectively adopt my son.

I've gone to the social services in Germany, lawyers and even pretty high up in the State Department as they are in effect stealing him from me, but still can't get any contact or updates on him from her. It's hard to believe that she is an american, he is an american, but since she is so set on staying there and had a kid with a German guy, I am being effectively pushed out by diplomatic red tape.

So, no, I will not be blaming anything on her. She has damn near completely shut me out of his life and he prolly wont even technically be my kid come this time next year.

12/3/2019 1:54:04 PM

BigMan157
no u
103352 Posts
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the secret secret santa is going well this year at least

12/3/2019 1:55:47 PM

BanjoMan
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since we are on this topic, are there any twwers with experience in international or divorce law? Man, I'd give my left nut for a 15 min consultation right now.

12/3/2019 2:00:08 PM

bbehe
Burn it all down.
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Hey Banjo, remember what you sent me when I messaged you about the gift? 'Fuck it, I got mine'...you think your exwife thinks that when shes nailing the German dude?

12/3/2019 2:33:04 PM

StTexan
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12/3/2019 2:36:37 PM

UJustWait84
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The old TWW woulda had this thread blown up to multiple pages by now, but this thread is a nice early Xmas gift bringing the lafta already.



[Edited on December 3, 2019 at 2:39 PM. Reason : .]

12/3/2019 2:38:05 PM

EMCE
balls deep
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German dude is probably waxing BanjoMan's ex- wife's ass, while reading his father's day care like:

12/3/2019 2:47:46 PM

FroshKiller
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"The old TWW" would not have blown up to multiple pages revisiting some shit from four years ago.

12/3/2019 3:12:00 PM

BanjoMan
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Quote :
"Hey Banjo, remember what you sent me when I messaged you about the gift? 'Fuck it, I got mine'."


I remember you playing the victim and being an outright asshole from the get go, calling me a liar despite me presenting the logistics of an entirely reasonable problem. I remember that your only solution was for me to make a donation that I could not make in the situation that I was in. I was then harassed to seemingly no end when in reality I was trying to explain what had happened and to find a fix to it.

You're still going at it. When a guy says that he's sorry and acknowledges how things went to shit, most people find a way to mutually move on, but you have been riding this topic for years now. Maybe it's because this is an internet alias and thus we are not held to the normal standards of maturity and manners, or maybe it's because you are an attention-seeking middle child. Who the fuck knows, or cares at this point?

Again, I am sorry for what happened with your gift, mostly because I was happy to have some sort of Christmas, even if that be with internet buddies, and I ended up just being harassed. I shouldn't have said what I said about "I got mine", I just felt backed into a corner at that point. You rode the victim card and attacked me to no avail, on a Christmas where literally the only gift that I got was a gift for my son from TWW. That was it. Ok, I made a mistake by going the cheap route with shipping and I'll own up to it and for how I responded. I have apologised for the whole ordeal many times before, and I'll write that I am sorry, again.

I have moved on from situations much worse than a secret santa and have done so much quicker than you have in this case. I don't know how to make it up to you aside from saying that I wished I had paid for shipment confirmation and insurance, and that I am sorry that you didn't get it. Other than that, it's fine for you to never forgive me for it, but goddamn, move on man.



[Edited on December 3, 2019 at 4:23 PM. Reason : k]

12/3/2019 4:14:40 PM

rwoody
Save TWW
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Seems to me, if this happened to me, one thing I, as me, wouldn't do is create a whole new thread about the very event

But that's me

12/3/2019 4:58:39 PM

BanjoMan
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If you are referring to me, I did not make this thread and had no intentions on going through all of this history again.

I wanted to get involved this year to try to make amends for what happened. The bottom line is that I have always been a fan of secret santa and this board.

12/3/2019 5:05:38 PM

rwoody
Save TWW
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There's no way you don't know what thread I mean, none.

And do you like this board? Seems like everyone is in a constant battle to own you first and you're pretty mad at a good chunk of posters

12/3/2019 5:15:27 PM

BanjoMan
All American
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I like the idea of this board.

I like that it's not a known entity outside of the NC State community. That has its advantages. I don't have to worry about somebody from my own personal life trying to stalk me on this site. Of course there's always a chance that something like that would happen, but it's not nearly as risky as something like FB or instagram.

It's also nice that a lot of the users have at least a basic understanding of writing argumentatively, which can make for interesting and useful practice in forming logical arguments. I have also learned quite a bit from this board, and used it a lot abroad to just stay up to date about things in the US.

Most of all, I have gotten some pretty decent feedback from people on TWW. It's why I stick around; to try and pay people back.

Sure, some people aren't going to ever shut up about me, but that's out of my control. I can't do anything about it and so I accept it.


[Edited on December 3, 2019 at 6:20 PM. Reason : k]

12/3/2019 6:06:45 PM

fatcatt316
All American
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Can't believe Secret Santa is going out like this

Is Krazy Kwanzaa still on??

12/3/2019 6:08:33 PM

BanjoMan
All American
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there is nothing stopping anybody from signing up. Everybody needs a fall guy, I guess.

12/3/2019 6:10:47 PM

elise
mainly potato
13071 Posts
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...

12/3/2019 6:46:44 PM

PaulISdead
All American
8547 Posts
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Bangoman is one of the better trolls I've seen

12/3/2019 8:07:16 PM

bbehe
Burn it all down.
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Banjo, it's not so much you fucked up, but you CONSTANTLY lied about it to me, Fuckwads, and TWW.

12/3/2019 8:28:18 PM

BanjoMan
All American
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You have no proof that I lied about the package, that is your assumption, despite all of my vehement protests on the matter. I owned up to not getting tracking or the UPS to ship it. But there is nothing that would indicate that my recollection of events, although they were shitty for you, weren't valid.

You took that assumption and ran with it like a mob boss, that's cyber harassment. Still to this fucking day. Move on man, or not, or try to find peace somehow. I don't know, if hatin on me is your therapy, then have at it.

Tell me this though, are you a middle child?

12/3/2019 10:17:20 PM

BettrOffDead
All American
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no one has pointed out that the title says "memorandum" instead of in memoriam

12/4/2019 9:18:24 AM

elise
mainly potato
13071 Posts
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I just can't with this. Also, middle children are used to being forgotten about. My dad has forgotten my birthday multiple times. Or maybe he's just an asshole. Either way, that has nothing to do with this. Carry on, gentlemen.

12/4/2019 11:39:31 AM

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