A Duke grad, a UNC grad, and an NCSU grad are walking down the street when they see a magic lamp. They all pick it up and rub it at the same time, so that they can all get their wishes.

The Genie comes out of the lamp and looks at the three grads. He says, "I am afraid I cannot grant three wishes to each of you. I can only grant three wishes right now, but I see that makes one wish per person."

The Duke grad thinks a moment and says, "I love my university, so I want to be able to work there for the rest of my life." The Genie nods and the Duke grad's business is moved to the center of Duke's campus.

The UNC grad thinks a moment and says, "I love my university, too. I want a wall built around it so that no one can get in and no one can leave." The Genie nodes and a wall appears around UNC's campus.

The NCSU grad thinks a moment and says, "Tell me a little more about this wall?"

The Genie replies, "It's fifty feet high and no one can leave or enter."

The NCSU grad smiles. "Fill it with water."

10/1/2025 7:37:18 PM

What's a genie "node"?

10/1/2025 8:44:13 PM

It's what appeared around UNC's campus, along with a wall

10/2/2025 7:07:44 AM

She touched my genie node

10/2/2025 11:55:20 AM

A couple went golfing one day at a very exclusive course lined with million dollar homes. On the third tee, the husband cautioned, “Honey, be careful when you drive. If we break one of those windows, it’ll cost us a fortune to repair.”

Of course, she immediately shanked her drive right through the window of the biggest house on the course. The husband cringed, “I warned you to watch out! Now we’ll have to go up there and apologize and see how much that lousy drive is going to cost us.”

They walked up, knocked on the door, and a warm voice said, “Come on in.” When they opened the door they saw glass all over the place and a broken antique bottle lying on its side near the broken window. A man reclining on the couch asked, “Are you the people that broke the window?”

Uh…yeah, we’re very sorry about that,” the husband replied.

“Oh, no apology is necessary. Actually I want to thank you. You see, I’m a genie, and I’ve been trapped in that bottle for a thousand years. Now that you’ve released me, I’m allowed to grant three wishes. I’ll give you each one wish, and I’ll keep the last one for myself.”

“Wow, that’s great!” the husband said. He pondered a moment and blurted out, “I’d like a million dollars a year for the rest of my life.”

“No problem,” said the genie, “You’ve got it. I have already put a million dollars in your bank account. It’s the least I can do.”

“And now you, young lady, what do you want?” the genie asked.

“I’d like to own a gorgeous home complete with servants in every country in the world,” she said.

“Consider it done. The deeds are now in your name,” the genie said.

“And now,” the couple both asked in unison, “what’s your wish, genie?”


Well, since I’ve been trapped in that bottle and haven’t been with a woman in a thousand years, my wish is to have sex with your wife.”

The husband looked at his wife and said, “Gee, honey, you know we both now have a fortune, and all those houses. What do you think?”

She mulled it over for a few moments and said, “You know, you’re right. Considering all that, I guess I wouldn’t mind.”

The genie and the woman went upstairs where he ravished her for the rest of the afternoon. Both satisfied each other repeatedly, and afterwards, the genie rolled over and looked at the wife and asked, “How old are you and your husband?”

“Why, we’re both thirty-five,” she responded breathlessly.

“No shit! Thirty-five years old and both of you still believe in genies?”

8/21/2026 10:09:32 PM