Sweden All American 12288 Posts user info edit comment |
RED MEANS LOL 11/12/2008 3:57:48 PM |
nothing22 All American 21537 Posts user info edit comment |
how bout a photo essay of women getting into traffic accidents at intersections? 11/13/2008 10:35:13 AM |
fatcatt316 All American 3800 Posts user info edit comment |
Hhaa, impatient 11/13/2008 11:29:08 AM |
NeuseRvrRat hello Mr. NSA! 35376 Posts user info edit comment |
here's my entry:
I DON'T KNOW IF ANY OF YOU HAVE BEEN TO THE HARDEES IN LILLINGTON, BUT THAT PLACE HAS A HISTORY OF RHEE RHEE'S.
THEY HAVE INDUSTRIAL STYLE TOILETS THAT HAVE NO RESERVOIR ON THE BACK AND NO TOILET LID, JUST A MOVABLE TOILET SEAT. FOR THE PLUMBING THERE'S JUST A PIPE COMING OUT OF THE WALL WHICH MAKES A 90 DEGREE BEND AND GOES INTO THE BACK PART OF THE TOILET. AT THE 90 DEGREE BEND THERE'S A FITTING WITH A HANDLE ON IT TO FLUSH THE TOILET. I'M SURE YOU'VE ALL SEEN THESE TOILETS. IN CASE YOU STILL CAN'T IMAGINE IT, THIS IS WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE:
WELL, I ONCE WENT IN THAT HARDEES TO FIND THE WORST INDUSTRIAL ACCIDENT I'VE EVER SEEN TO BE HONEST.
I TRIED TO RECREATE THE ACCIDENT SCENE THE BEST I COULD AND I CAME UP WITH THE FOLLOWING SCENARIO. A 275LB MALE CONSTRUCTION WORKER HAD EATEN TWO PHILLY CHEESE STEAKS THE NIGHT BEFORE. HE WAS ON HIS WAY TO WORK WHEN HE REALIZED HE HAD RHEE RHEE. HE STOPPED AT THE HARDEES AND RAN IN, HEADING STRAIGHT FOR THE BATHROOM. HE RAN INTO THE BATHROOM AND BURST INTO THE STALL, VIOLENTLY STRUGGLING TO RELEASE HIS BELT, BUTTON AND FLY BEFORE HE HEAVILY LOOSE PILED HIMSELF. HE HAD TROUBLE WITH THE BELT AND THE BUTTON, WHICH LOST HIM HIS LAST PRECIOUS SECONDS.
AS HE GOT HIS PANTS DOWN HE SIMULTANEOUSLY TRIED TO SIT DOWN AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE. THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ONE SWIFT MOTION, WHICH WOULD HOPEFULLY END UP WITH THE LOOSE PILE IN THE TOILET. UNFORTUNATELY THE BELT HAD COST HIM TOO MUCH TIME AND AS HE BENT FORWARD TO SIT DOWN HE HAD WHAT I REFER TO AS A "LONG POP FART." THIS CAUSED AN IMMEDIATE BLOWOUT OF LOOSE PILE RHEE ALL OVER THE WALL, FLOOR AND PLUMBING OF THE TOILET.
HE WAS SURPRISED WITH THE FEROCITY OF THE LONG POP AND AFTER FEELING IT OUT FOR A MOMENT HE REALIZED ALL OF THE RHEE WAS GONE. SINCE HE WAS NOW FINISHED DUMPING LOOSE PILE, HE SIMPLY WIPED HIS ASS AND LEFT THE BATHROOM THAT WAY. THE HARDEES EMPLOYEES REFUSED TO CLEAN IT BECAUSE OF THEIR LOW WAGES AND LAST I HEARD THEY HAD TO CALL IN Arab13 TO HANDLE IT. 11/14/2008 11:29:43 AM |
ncsuallday Sink the Flagship 9818 Posts user info edit comment |
alright SaabTurbo 11/15/2008 1:15:09 PM |
themodernage Suspended 1339 Posts user info edit comment |
IS THIS FOR TARGET? I THINK THIS IS FOR TARGET OR MORE IMPORTANTLY FOR THE COMMUNIST PARTY. 11/16/2008 9:02:15 PM |
sNuwPack All American 6519 Posts user info edit comment |
um....patience is a virtue. 11/17/2008 6:31:48 PM |
marko Tom Joad 72824 Posts user info edit comment |
Deadline has been extended to December 5th, 2008. 11/24/2008 11:46:23 AM |
Lelacake All American 1486 Posts user info edit comment |
this makes me think of period sex. 12/16/2008 9:27:08 PM |
Bob Dylan All American 594 Posts user info edit comment |
has anybody won this shit yet? 12/28/2008 2:41:36 AM |
nothing22 All American 21537 Posts user info edit comment |
http://ncsu.edu/featured-stories/community-of-scholars/dec-2008/rmg-contest/index.php
you can't make this up 1/7/2009 9:05:01 AM |